[justify]Interested in Ripplesky - I played one of StormClan's early leaders, Planetarystar, but I haven't been involved in the Clan since her and I'd love to get back into it.
My posts are generally all over a hundred words - here's my most recent, spoilered for length:[/justify]
Display More[fancypost bgcolor=#000000; bordercolor=#FF006E; borderwidth=3px; border-top: 3px dashed #FF006E; border-left: 3px dashed #FF006E; border-bottom: 3px dashed #FF006E; border-right: 3px dashed #FF006E; width: 230px; ]
[fancyimage]http://i1234.photobucket.com/a…name-text_zpsa95d17f0.png[/fancyimage]
[justify]He hadn't felt so safe, so at home, so simply happy in a long time. Pressed up against Jank's rough brown tabby fur, he felt, for the first time in his memory, whole - like this was where he belonged, at Jank's side, physical location be damned. If not for the tangible sensations - the warmth of the older tom's body against his, the way his own body shook with excitement and anticipation and fear, the beat of his other half's heart - he would have been quite sure that he was dreaming, and still yet he did not fully trust his senses. Often he had dreamed of this meeting and woke to find it nothing more than a fantasy, and that had broken him. Perhaps now he could begin to mend.
During the months - or years, he'd lost any notion of how long it had been - since they had been separated, the silver tom had almost obsessively relived every memory he had of Jank, making sure they stayed firmly planted in his head. At one low point, he had been nearly delusional, on occasion believing the phantom from his memories walked beside him. It was those memories, of the good and the bad, that had kept him sane - that had nearly driven him mad. He had never been sure which was worse.
But now he didn't have to figure it out. They were together again, and he would never have to worry about anything, because when they were together there were no problems, there was only them and their love and their peaceful, glorious solitude. As long as they were happy, and together, that was all he would ever, ever need. That was all he wanted, and it was so close he could taste it. If he could have, he would've buried his face in Jank's fur and just stayed there forever.
It seemed, however, that there was a problem - if Jank didn't remember himself, what would he think of Crash? What would he do? Would he up and leave him all alone again? Or worse, would he decide Crash was up to no good or not to be trusted and - and perhaps dispose of the problem he caused? Although he wasn't sure he would mind the latter option much - at least it would be dying by Jank and not the slow burn of heartbreak - and he could always watch over him, even if the tabby never realized who he really was.
The venom in the tom's voice when he spat out the question made Crash shrink away, flattening his ears to his head and looking, in all honesty, even more pathetic. He took a deep, shuddering breath and struggled to find the words - how did one explain this whole debacle? He had to at least try - he would never forgive himself if he failed to find the words and could say nothing.
"I'm Crash." he repeated again. Might as well start at the beginning of the story, right? "I- We were both part of a group called the Blackheart Rogues. We grew up there - y-you're a couple of years older than me, s-so we didn't know each other growing up or anything. I met you when I was a treater-in-training, which... I don't remember how long ago it was, but it was a long time ago."
His mind had often focused upon that fateful day, that first meeting, when he knew right from the start that the prickly tom had stolen his heart. "You, uh, you fell down a flight of stairs in the building where we lived. I offered to help you in case you were hurt - you were a treater too, though, so I don't know why you would've needed my help - and you knew you were fine, but you said you'd let me get in some practice anyway. You... you made fun of me for being nervous."
He had said something along the lines of you look like you're about to get eaten by a dog, and Crash hadn't thought it funny at the time, but remembering it brought a bubble of hysterical laughter to the surface. "We, uh... We had a weird contest." His face burned at the thought - it had been ridiculous, and more than a trifle immature, but he still recalled it fondly. "You wouldn't tell me why you thought you were weird, so I won."
He cracked a grin. "We play fought for a while - you threatened to push me down some stairs 'cause I made fun of you - a-and then..." He trailed off, unsure - even now, it took a lot of courage and a lot of inner struggle for him to reveal his secret that wasn't really much of a secret anymore. "And I told you I was gay. And that I had a crush on you. And, uh, you said you weren't gay but you would be. For.. for me. I was the happiest cat alive that day."
Crash truly believed that no joy anyone had ever felt could have matched up to what he had felt that day, no matter the circumstance. "So we got together. And we got to know each other better, and every single day I fell in love with you more and more until I felt like my heart was going to explode from feeling so much. But... The Blackhearts wasn't a place for someone like me. I was too timid. Too shy. Too afraid of everything. And most of all, I-I was - well, nothing I like to repeat in polite company. So... I told you I was going to leave, that I was going to find myself and figure out who I was. I told you not to follow me - I promised I would be back. But..."
Another shuddering breath; this was the part that would kill him. "Without you there with me, I was dying. I could hunt and take care of myself, but - I just - I could not live without you, and by the time I realized it, I thought it was too late - I thought I would never see you again - and for a long time, I didn't - but now you're here, and we can be together again, and - and please don't leave me." Crash looked him in the eye, hoping he could see the pain that shot through his like lightning, hear the pitiable plea in his voice. "Please."[/justify]
[/fancypost]
