Posts by Riverclaw22

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[size=11pt]Ic: "No..." Naomi wanted to pull from Angel's grip but even she was too weak to do so. She couldn't look into his sorrowful eyes, and kept her own pointed to the ground. He didn't deserve to be the father. He didn't need this kind of stress in his life. "It won't work out because... Because.... You don't deserve this!" She sobbed, "You don't deserve to be a father!" She looked at him in horror upon realizing what words escaped her mouth. She pulled away from his grip this time, but only made it a few feet before falling to her knees. She buried her face in her hands, more sobs escaping her mouth.
"I'm so sorry..."[/size]

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[size=11pt]Ic: "No it's not fine!" She cried out, turning away from him. "How could I have been this freaking stupid! I-I've ruined everything! For once I thought I wasn't stupid and now look what happened!" She shook her head once more, not even caring to wipe off the tears anymore. "I'm an idiot Angel, an idiot. I can't do anything right!" She glanced down at her stomach, and all she could see was the bump. It was there, and there was no denying it. She was going to have twins. It may not have been visible to others, but to her it was. "I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry..."[/size]

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[size=11pt]Ic: "Angel…" Naomi mumbled, her voice no longer in sobs, but tears still running down her cheeks. "What am I supposed to do? Of course I'm an idiot Angel. I'm going to be a mother and I don't even know if I want to keep it! You know I'm not that kind of person… It's just that, at the same time, I'm not ready to be a parent!" She shook her head. "But I can't just 'get rid of it'!" It was after a moment she finally faced Angel again, burying her face into his chest as she tried her best to calm down.[/size]

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[size=11pt]Ic: "What's the use Angel? I've messed everything up..." She sighed, her crying only stopping because she had nothing left in her to do so. "And I'll always doubt myself, Angel. I'm not brave, I'm a coward. I'm… Pregnant… And I don't know what to do. You call that brave? Why, that's not even smart!" She paused along the word 'pregnant' as she spoke. It still all seemed surreal to her. Was this her life now? Or was she meant to change it?[/size]

[color=#befff1][size=11pt]Ooc: tracking; I think I'll join in on this one since I have so much free time :)[/size]

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[size=11pt]Ic: "Heh... You know I can never agree to that." She sniffed, turning away from him. "I-I just... What am I supposed to do, Angel? I'm not ready for this... And I can't just terminate either!" More tears started streaming down her cheeks as she spoke. "Angel, I'm scared." Naomi buried herself into Angel finally, quietly crying to herself as her face was in his chest.[/size]

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[size=11pt]Ic: Naomi never realized how much she needed someone until now. The warmth from Angel's body for some reason really soothed her, and all she wanted to do was never move again. But of course, it took quite some time for her to settle down. "What if I put it up for adoption?" She finally said after a long moments silence, "I-I know it's p-probably a crazy option I'm giving you, but then you won't have to go through this." She finally lifted her head, and her blue eyes met Angel's for what was probably the first time today. They were red and puffy. [/size]

[color=#befff1][size=11pt]Ooc: Oh dear, I'm hoping/assuming you got that taken care of though??[/size]

[size=11pt]Ic: Naomi watched as he doctor left, sorrow filling her eyes. "I… No… John you don't deserve to go through this." She said, her eyes watering but not enough for tears to spill out. "I just- oh god I'm not ready. I can't do this! I'm sorry John. I'll leave first thing tomorrow. You don't have to worry about me…" Her voice trailed off as she looked down at the ground, lost in her own thoughts. How was she going to do this? There wasn't enough room in the apartment, let alone Naomi even ready to handle all of this in the first place. [/size]

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[size=11pt]Ic: "But... John, I..." She pulled her hands away from his. "I can't do this. You can't do this! You're not even the father, why would you want to put yourself through raising them?" She stopped for a moment, looking down at her bump. She took a breath, speaking a bit more quietly this time. "I don't know why you're putting yourself through this. I've messed up a lot of things for you, John. Why.... Why would you want to do this? What if I put them up for adoption?"[/size]

[color=#befff1][size=11pt]Ooc: Bump~[/size]

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[size=11pt]Ic: Naomi just looked up at him as he spoke. She knew she wasn't going to put them up for adoption; she didn't know why she even suggested it. The fact that she wanted the children herself at one point, she can't just simply give up now. But at the same time, this was all too much for her to handle. Naomi watched as John stood up, her eyes starting to water up again. She felt a pain in her chest that she couldn't explain. "Wait." She said, standing up to block him from the doorway. She wanted to say so much to him in this moment, but she couldn't bring herself to. It was then her eyes spilled over with tears. "I can't. N-Nevermind. I'm sorry John, I'm sorry…" She felt trapped in the room as she looked at him. "I-I have to go." She quickly turned around, and just like that, she was running down the halls, away from the room as she cried.[/size]

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Ic: Naomi wanted to turn around so badly, but at the same time, she couldn't. Even if she wanted to go back, now was not the time. It almost scared her running away from John like this; in fact, it did. Last time she did this, it was from her fiancé. And now, it was from someone she loved. I can't do this anymore. I can't raise two children. I can't even love someone... She went through the doors as fast as possible, and thankfully no one was there to watch her breakdown. She had forgotten how late it was, however, being greeted with darkness. She stopped for a moment to look around, only to just keep running away, following the street lights as they lit up the sidewalk.
She was still taking shallow breaths, both from exhaustion and crying. She had reached a nearby park, and just like that, collapsed on the closest bench. I'm right back where I started... She thought, her face in her hands as she cried. Now what can I do?

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[size=11pt]Ic: Naomi heard his voice and stopped crying, but still his her face in her hands. He came back for me? But why? She knew he was right… Being out here wasn't safe and she could have gotten hurt. It was then, still without a word spoken, she sat up and wrapped her arms around him in the blink of an eye. She buried her face in his chest, and all she did was start to cry again. "I'm sorry John." She sobbed, "I would never give them up; I don't know why I even said it. I'm sorry John." She wiped her eyes, but tears still ran down her cheeks. "I'm just so lost… I'm scared."[/size]

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Ic: "I have to feel sorry, I ran away from you." She said, wiping tears from her eyes. She looked up at him with puffy eyes, tears still escaping them."I-I know this sounds crazy, but I love you John." She said, burying her face back into his chest. "And I-I don't know why, because after all that's happened I shouldn't trust anybody. So why do I like you? Why am I trying anything anymore? Why do I want to be with you? I can't even handle having twins, so why do I think any of this is a good idea? Why do I even trust you in the first place?" She just kept rambling all the thoughts going through her head. And Naomi was right. She loved Mathyew more than anything. She trust him just as much as he trusted her. So how did she know John might turn back on her? She had no idea, yet something told her to trust him and she didn't know what to do.

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Ic: She smiled lightly under the tears, holding him tighter as she tried to control herself; to calm herself down. He was right though, how could she trust him? She felt this exact way with Mathyew, so what made it any different than John? There of course were times she'd get scared or nervous around him. That would never change. But all she could do for now was hope. She needed all the help in the world right now. She didn't want to look him in the eye from the state she was in. She didn't want him to see her like this. She nodded lightly, leaning against him as she finally calmed down, only giving shallow breaths. "It's cold." She said after a long pause of silence, "We should get home."

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[size=9pt]Ic: Naomi was quiet the whole way home, and just looked at her lap the whole time. By the time they had gotten back to the apparent, she was exhausted. Today was not only long, but after being so upset and running pretty far while carrying twins, it was safe to admit she just wanted to sleep. "Yeah, I guess so." Naomi sighed, throwing off her flannel. She had a hint of sorrow in her voice. She was still upset, needless to say, but she didn't want to think about it too much. "I just can't wait to get some sleep…"[/size]

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[size=9pt]Ic: Naomi just nodded, walking off to the bathroom to change her clothes. She still wasn't sure about any of this. She didn't think any of this was a good idea, that she wouldn't be able to do it at all. And even though John said they could get through this together, did he really think that? Or was it just so she could calm down? She tried shaking the thoughts out but it didn't really work. She left the bathroom and went over to the couch as usual. She was about to just pass out there, but it just didn't… Feel right. She stood there a bit, thoughts swarming her head like bees. She hated the couch to be honest. It made her back hurt and it was uncomfortable. And just like that, she turned around and quietly opened the door to John's room. She shyly went over to the empty side of the bed, and slowly lay down next to him. He did offer, after all. She tried to lay as far as a distance not to bother him, but sleep caught up to her and she fell asleep in an instant.[/size]

[color=#befff1][size=9pt]Ooc: Yeah that's sounds good. Where to? Maybe like 2 months later? Then she'll be 7 months. Also sorry I haven't replied, I've been with family in Boston for a bit.[/size]

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[color=#befff1]Ooc: cool I'll start then.

Ic: Naomi sat up and blinked the sleep out of her eyes. The blinds had been left open from the previous night, hence every bit of sunlight shining through the window. Last night wasn't exactly nice for her, either. Naomi's bump was pretty large now, and her back was always sore. She had moved to the couch so she wouldn't disturb John last night, but it didn't help her current condition. She got off the couch, closed the blinds, and slowly made her way into the bathroom to shower.

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Ic: Naomi cleaned off and got dressed, and greeted John right in the doorway. "Oh, good morning." She said quietly, "I didn't know you were going to be up early." She was originally going to give him a kiss on the cheek, but today she just felt a bit shy to. Sure, they liked each other, but at the same time she still sometimes felt uncomfortable being so open with him. She smiled lightly before heading into the kitchen for a glass of water. "So, what should we do today?" She called out from the room, "I was thinking… We haven't exactly bought stuff for the twins yet. Maybe we should today…?"