Posts by ARCTICWIND

She was startled for sure hearing her name called out, and she couldn't help herself from stiffening as her fur stood on end. When she brought her gaze to the cat who called her name, she let out a huge breathe of relief. For a moment she thought she was in trouble or something. Not that she caused any trouble, at least she didn't think so. Unless she had made one of the kits anxious and one of the queens wanted her to leave for a bit. However, it was none of that. Mottlewish was only trying to comfort her. Both Mottlewish and Virgo were perma queens, so she figured they had more experience with kits than she ever will. An nervous chuckle escaped her as she brought a paw to her neck, "Hello Mottlewish. I'm... Doing fine. Physically. I'm just thinking about my son. How to be a good mother and what I should strive for. For him to have the future he wants." Did that make any sense? Was she wrong for calling Bosie her son? She wasn't sure if it was too forward. She simply took him in and he was attached to her. Heck, he probably didn't think of her as such. That was okay too. As long as he grew up happy and healthy that's really all she could wish for. Especially during a time like this.

Another voice called out to her and it was none other than her mate. She couldn't imagine what was going through his mind with Heronstar's death and her decision to raise and look after Bosie. She hadn't been there to witness Heronstar's death because she had been more concerned with Bosie. She promised not to leave his side, so she stood by him. He was surrounded by strangers, so she wanted to be with him until he got used to everyone and built his confidence. Still, Heronstar's death meant many things. Her mate would become leader and he would have to dedicate more time to the entire clan. No longer would they have the free time to go for strolls or simply enjoy each others company. The next was that he would be sleeping in the leader's den. Normally they would share a nest, but those days would come to end. She wouldn't dare enter the leader's den. She didn't want any special privileges because she was his mate. They both needed to find some sort of balance with their new roles, which could take some time. Especially with what was going on.

For now they would enjoy this moment. Before he went off and officially became leader. When he would be known as Juniperstar. While they hadn't talked about Bosie and how the kit would effect everything, she hoped he wasn't angry at her. Right now they couldn't talk about it. They had their own matters to attend. All she did was tilt her head and flash him a smile along with a flick of her tail in greeting.

It was then that Bosie made his way to her and the others with a rather intriguing object. She really didn't understand what it was until he stated he couldn't find feathers that matched her ears. Oh, so he was trying to make me. That's actually cute. Hehe, I can see it. A fond smile made its way to her lips seeing Bosie sheepish. It amazed her to end how nervous the boy was, but then again they promised to stay together. A decision that was made from a single journey. They hadn't had the time to adjust to these new changes. Nevertheless, she couldn't say she had any regrets towards her decision. Glancing at the object, she couldn't help herself. She balanced on her hindlegs as she brought her paws to her ears, "I think it's a spitting image! Maybe even better," she laughed. Knowing Juniperthorn he'd be confused and say no. No this mossball with a pebble and feather sticking out of it looks nothing like you. To that, she would say: Shut up. It's the thought that counts when it comes to presents. For Bosie to make this showed her that the kit did seem to like her just as she liked him.

Of course she would be attending this session, despite the massive heat. Technically she wasn't a queen or was thinking of having kits in the future, but she was looking after Bosie. He was her son? She never called him that to his face, but that was because she didn't want to force him into it. Although, if she had to admit... It was awkward to bring herself here. Remember you want him to have a good future. While she wasn't sure Mottlewish would be giving specific advice to cats, any advice was better then going about this blindly. Still, she was very much flustered. When she sat near Mottlewish she couldn't hold eye contact for more than a few seconds. A pathetic wave was all she could offer as some sort of greeting. Thankfully Sedgeroot was here. She wasn't going to be alone for this. The older tom brought comfort to her. Just knowing he was here was enough moral support. As for his question she couldn't say it was a bad question. She may not know how old Bosie was, but he seemed pretty close to apprentice aged. I wonder if I should tell him about the roles of a warior and medicine cat. Maybe that will give him something to think about when the time comes. I'll wait after Mottlewish gives Sedgeroot her advice on his question.

// edited because i got ninja'd

Bosie was fine to get to know, but she couldn't be attached to his hip all the time. Just as he was his own person so was she. Although, she'd come to realize that she had less time to herself these days. Usually she'd go off and take strolls on her free time, but she hadn't been able to do that too much recently. She and Juniperthorn were adults, so she didn't need to look out for him all the time. He had others to help him out too. As for Bosie? He was a kit and he needed some guidance. Not to mention he didn't know everyone here or knew some cats well enough to be comfortable while she was gone. She always knew kits were difficult to raise, but she didn't think it would hit her this bad. Then again she was like the mist. Coming and going as she pleased. Everyone knew she went off on her own from time to time, which was fine because she always returned. Not to say she disliked not being able to go off whenever she wanted. It was just so strange. Being tied to another cat this way. Settling down that is. Bosie wasn't her flesh and blood, but she loved him all the same.

Funny how she never thought she'd have a family of her own, yet here she was with a son. Funny how she was now like Sedgeroot at the roots of the nursery taking a break as their kits played with each other. She couldn't say no to his invitation. He was kind, so she saw no need to deny him some time. Seems like everyone's worried about me and trying to get me adjusted. That's nice. Having them be concerned. I'm not going to be forced to fend for myself and suffer. "... Thank you. Thank you for looking out for me during this time along with Mottlewish. A lot of things are on my mind, but Bosie is the main topic of our conversation." Was that rude? I hope not. Fiddling with her paws, she couldn't face him. She didn't want to see his angry face, if he was angry that is.

A moment of silence passed between them before she added, "I want the best for him. Bosie that is. I just... Don't know what I should do or how should I do it. I... I never met my mother. I was raised alone by my father and he would come visit me every once and awhile. I never experienced a normal kithood, so I don't have anything to go on for Bosie. Bosie and I... I'm not sure what we are. I consider him my son, but if he doesn't want that that's fine too. I can't force him to see me that way. I really just want him to happy I guess."

She'd been taught to climb trees as soon as she had been able to. Her father insisted on it. Not that she hated him for it. He simply cared for her and wanted the best for her. She could understand that much. She herself loved climbing trees and excelled at it. For her, it was the sights one saw at the highest branch that intrigued her. That's why she never rushed these things. She took her time feeling the bark and planning the best route to climb, as bark became worn away it was much more difficult to climb. She had been coming back from a stroll to ease her mind from recent developments. It was then she was able to see Sharptooth plummet and fall on his back. That certainly isn't good. Then she noticed Bosie there. He'd witnessed accident. She couldn't say she was concerned, since many in her time here had fallen or couldn't get down trees. Whatever the case, she alerted two nearby warriors to get a medic here just in case this was more dangerous than it let on.

With that said and done she made her way to Bosie's side. Figuring everyone said what was needed she didn't bother saying anymore. Still, that didn't mean she wasn't concerned about Sharptooth. It didn't seem like he would be okay. The wind got knocked out of him it seemed. Hopefully he didn't break some bones... I shouldn't even try to fancy the thought.

For a clan known for climbing trees she couldn't tell you how many times she had seen accidents from them. She couldn't count them all, but the point is that there were a lot of accidents. She also had to bring kits down from climbing trees. It's not that they meant to cause some trouble and panic to the queens, but they just wanted to become warriors already. Watching them climb was nice, but the problem mostly stemmed from the inability to get down a tree. Thankfully the kits she brought down didn't try to get down themselves. It was a terrifying thought. It wasn't like she could save them from broken bones or death if they decided to try and climb down away from her. The guilt would eat her. She would rather have the kits be safe while she took the blow. Even if it meant broken bones. Yes, she was young. However, kits still had a future. She couldn't allow herself to let it be cut so short.

Dustdevil was nice. He joined the clan not too long ago, but he still hadn't gotten the hang of climbing trees. Many members of the clan weren't actually skilled in climbing trees, which would be considered funny to some outsiders. Here's the thing though... Skyclan was made up of mostly kittypet and loners. No one actually had true skyclan blood within them. Heronstar had actually been a Riverclanner, yet she became their leader. That's why she watched in horror as Dustdevil's collar was held by a branch, causing said warrior to be held up in the air. She couldn't do anything to save the warrior flailing, trying to save himself. Thankfully the branch snapped and down Dustdevil went. The breath she had been holding back released.

She rushed to group and noted Bosie had been there. Was he traumatized? Said question wouldn't be answered for now. Bosie wanted to find help, which was the best course of action in this moment. However, she didn't know how to break it to the kit that Bisonpaw was gone. After Heronstar died... Bisonpaw was gone too. The only medics around were Charcoalsmudge and Tawnypaw. Bisonpaw was a conversation for a later date, if it came to it. Bosie could understand everyone was going through some sort of hardship, but he couldn't understand the true extent of their hardships. "Y-yes. Go find some help. Go get Tawnypaw or Charcoalsmudge to come here. They're in the medicine cat den, hopefully." Does he know who they are? We'll find out soon enough.

I really do hope I'll do fine. I don't want to ruin a future. Even unknowingly. That would be the worst crime to commit.

"Willowsway? Father? Dad?" She really didn't know that much about Sedgeroot or Willowsway, so it took her awhile to get it. The realization would be evident on her face. If Sedgeroot was concerned about what she thought or if she had ill will towards that information he didn't need to worry. For her, the connection was what mattered most. Gender, clan, and appearance didn't matter to her. Heck, she and Juniperthorn were mates! Many would argue that Juniperthorn wasn't the best looking due to his scars. As for her? She had scars of her own too. Both of them had imperfections that would cause many to look another way for a partner. What mattered was the time spent with someone and the hardships you faced with them. That you both wanted to grow, but not for the other. Growth would be for yourself, the other would be there to support when you needed it. Being together meant understanding each other's weakness and continuing to be with each despite knowing each other's weaknesses. Going back to the topic at hand...

Bosie not seeing himself as her son or her as his mother didn't bother her. She honestly didn't mind. It was nice to hear Sedgeroot tell her it was okay to see him that way. A small smile she offered him. "Bosie doesn't have to see me as his mother or himself as my son. In the future, if he does that's fine. No matter what I'll love him and help him if he needs it. Even if we aren't flesh and blood, the moment I saw him I knew this is what I wanted."

"Mottlewish and Virgo watch those kits like hawks, they'll be sure to keep them from trouble."

"That's true. Virgo and Mottlewish have always been there and will continue to guide them," she chuckled. What a fool she was for thinking she'd need to take all the burden herself. She'd been fretting about not being enough. When the reality she could never take on the responsibility of raising kits all on her own. Others within the clan will guide them as well and she'd just have to step in when needed and continue to support them the best she could. Be with them, huh. I suppose some things really do have a simple solution. "You know... I'd never thought I'd raise a kit or have a family of my own. I always thought I'd be on my own and wander. Settling down? That's not normal for me. Juniperthorn and I are mates, but we never talked about starting a family."

"When I saw Bosie, I forgot all about Juniperthorn. Maybe that was cruel to spring this kit on him. We haven't talked about it because of... Things, but I have to tell him he doesn't need to. I'm more than okay looking after Bosie on my own," she sighed. The truth is that she didn't want things to become strained between her and Juniperthorn because of this decision. If someone were to ask who she would choose to give up she'd say Juniperthorn without a doubt. Bosie needed her. Needed her more than him. However, she could tell the two toms had some kind of tension going on. Bosie appeared to be guilty and Juniperthorn had been distant. "I wonder if I should talk to Juniperthorn about it when he gets back, but I know he's too stressed for his own good. I might tell Bosie who exactly Juniperthorn is and that he shouldn't feel guilty for taking me away from Juniperthorn."

When Sedgeroot flicked her pelt, she didn't know what to make of it. She didn't think it was a bad thing, so she left it at that. What she wasn't prepared for was his next comment. "All parents should have your mindset for their child." Such a compliment caused her to become flustered. Her paw practically slammed against her neck as she rubbed it. A habit of hers. She never was good at receiving compliments. All she could do was nod. All the while avoiding Sedgeroots face. Nothing against the older tom, but she didn't expect that at all. While she said nothing, it didn't mean she wasn't listening on to him. The rubbing stopped when Bosie was brought up. How she needed him and how he needed her. Mutual need. Do I need him? I... I don't need him to watch over me, but... Why do I need him? It was then that Juniperthorn was brought up yet again and she flinched at the mention of his name. Needless to say she was grateful to have Sedgeroot in her life. He was patient and never called her strange. Many cats still harbored negative feelings towards her for being a bloodclan lover. Not to mention speaking out against Charcoalsmudge and their choice of medicine cats.

In all honesty, she didn't know what to say. Sedgeroot was right. Bringing her paw down from her neck and tilting her head to face Sedgeroot after all this time... She sighed, "Alright..." It should be evident to Sedgeroot that she took his words to heart. The problem was that she didn't really have words to express what she wanted to say, nor did she have an inkling what she wanted to say. What message she wanted to give him.

She couldn't help herself from chuckling, "He prefers things that way." Being weak to others and bringing down his walls is always something he hates. Even to Mothshine and I. We both know when he's not himself, but if we were to endlessly tell him... He would never grow. A flower endures harsh conditions. When new-leaf comes it is then support comes. A simple bee gives it the strength it needs for moons to come. Then, Sedgeroot brought two important points. Indeed, what was important to him was also important to her. Unconsciously she brought her paw to the scar on her cheek. She recalled how afraid and angry he was knowing she was charmed by Bloodclan. He was even willing to let her go, because he wanted her to be truly happy. And her? Even though she hadn't been there for him when his mother had passed... She joined him once when he visited his mother's grave. That seemed to be enough. He was happy to see her there and found himself more at ease. She couldn't say she hated his mother, but her relationship with Lavenderstar held mixed signals. They ended off on the wrong foot to make matter worse. Still, she went to make peace with the former leader and offer Juniperthorn support.

"How do you think you will approach it with him?"

That was the second important point. She really didn't have a plan other than wait till things smoothed over to talk to him. She knew he was beyond stressed with his new role and she didn't want to add more onto that pile. Knowing him, he's probably blaming himself. The truth of the matter was that she knew that he was also afraid. Afraid of Bosie. Juniperthorn had been distant with her and that wasn't knew. He often distanced himself when he was stressed and needed some time alone. They continued to share the same nest, but they didn't really talk. She didn't want to bring up Bosie before they slept. If she did that would increase the chance he had nightmares. Nightmares of losing her or being a parent to a kit that wasn't even his by blood. "I don't really know. Juniperthorn's... Difficult." He might put all the blame on himself. I don't want that. He's already stressed enough as it is. Not to mention he's going through poppy seed withdrawal.

Still, she could at least tell Sedgeroot a rough outline of what she had. Maybe he could offer some input. "Sunhigh I'll talk to him outside of camp. I don't want to jump into it, so I'll probably as him what's on his mind. Then, I'll bring up Bosie. I'll tell him that he doesn't have to if he doesn't want to. If he does... Then, I'll tell him to take the time he needs. After all, he's going to become leader and he's mourning. I want him to be okay if he decided to help raise Bosie too. I want him to ease into the role." Did that make sense? Maybe he would understand? If he didn't that was okay too. Many times cats told her she was quite difficult to interpret.

To see Juniperth-, no, Juniperstar was strange for her. She always knew that he would eventually become leader, but she didn't think it would come so soon. Watching him call for a meeting where Heronstar and Lavenderstar once stood wasn't something she'd think she'd be used to. Calling him by Juniperstar was going to take some time too. He had only recently received his new name, which could be forgiven. Yet, she had the nagging feeling that he wouldn't appreciate being called Juniperstar. Even if he didn't say anything she could tell. He was bothered by his rise to leadership. Losing Heronstar and Lavenderstar was a heavy blow alright. Both leaders had gone with multiple lives taken. She hoped that Juniperthorn would not follow the same fate, but she would be lying to say she hadn't been thinking about it.

However, those thoughts were best left to rot for the time being. It was much too soon to be thinking that way. It was also dangerous to be having these thoughts. While she didn't exactly see him off or welcomed him back when he returned, she wanted to present for his first meeting. The two of them continued to share a nest, but eventually he would have to move into the leaders den. Those days of sharing a nest would be gone. Another saddening thought, but she made her decision not to follow him or ask him to continue sharing a nest with her. Such a request was selfish. He now had to worry about the image he held more than ever. If he allowed her to join him in the leader's den... She was worried that others would think he favored her because she was his mate.

Being mates with a leader... She wasn't sure how to feel about it. However, she knew one thing. A new deputy had to be picked and she wasn't going to volunteer. Even if he asked her, she would decline. In her mind there was only one cat in this clan who deserved it. Mothshine. Ultimately, Juniperstar could choose whoever he saw fit. For now, she would continue watching him. Just as she promised all those moons ago.

Talking to Sedgeroot brought her the peace of mind she really needed during these trying times. Funny, how she found an ally within him. Every since she took in Bosie she somehow became part of the parents group and slowly found herself integrating quite well into the group. Mottlewish, Virgo, and Sedgeroot were all very kind and patient with her. Compared to them she was young. A young parent who was concerned about the future of a kit she considered her son. For a while she felt conflicted thinking of Bosie as her son. It felt wrong to give a title he may not want. He never gave her permission to consider him that, for that reason she felt rather shameful for giving into that desire. The desire to be mother and son. She didn't care if he was not her flesh and blood. She didn't care that he had a mangled leg. She didn't care he was a kittypet. He was amazing. To her at least. He didn't need to do anything for her. If he really wanted to do something for her, she would ask that he continue his life the way he wanted.

"There's no harm in thinking of him as your son though."

Yes, there was no harm. Sedgeroot had told her it was okay. It was not sin to think of him as such. She accepted it. Finally accepted it. That the kit she found in that twoleg den... Was her son. Even if he didn't think of her as his mother or himself as her son, she would be okay. He didn't need to accept her feelings. Just watching him grow and being able to support him when he needed it was all she needed. Just as she needed that talk with Sedgeroot. The older warrior was now her friend? They had a certain understanding and didn't seem to mind each other's struggles. Sedgeroot opened up to her and she opened up to him. A heart to heart is what they had. Whatever was discussed would remain a secret. What wouldn't be a secret was that she was thankful to have met Sedgeroot. Another struggling parent trying their best for his kits.

After their talk she realized that she hadn't visited Bosie yet. Normally she'd go on a stroll, but she made it a point to see him every day. Get to see him and know him a bit better. However, she couldn't be with him for long. She had her duties to attend to after all. Duties that she had finished for the day. When she returned and went to look for Bosie, she hadn't been expecting Juniperstar. It was to see little Slatekit though, so she offered the kit a wave and a smile. He was Sedgeroot's son. It was nice to see that Slatekit and Bosie were conversing with one another. Hopefully they'll become friends.

Now, back to Juniperstar... The two of them hadn't really spoken to each other due to new responsibilities. "I really would encourage you to talk to Juniperthorn." Sedgeroot's words echoed in her mind. Yes, she needed to talk to Juniperstar. Not now though. Not with Bosie asking him to play a game with them. To say she wasn't nervous what Juniperstar's decision going to be was a lie. Juniperstar wasn't exactly known for playing games with kits. Throw Bosie and tension in the mix and I smell disaster. Whatever the case, she went to Juniperstar and nuzzled his cheek in greeting for a second. Then, she would go over to Bosie and bring her paw to his head, ruffling the fur atop his head. "Did I keep you waiting? Were you lonely? I'm sorry for not coming sooner, I had to do something important. I'll make it up to you Bosie. We could spend all day together tomorrow, if you want." I'll have to make up the work though. That's okay. A little more work is nothing.

The advice Mottlewish had given was solid. She found herself agreeing with the queen, but then again she had always intended for Bosie to be in charge of his own life. Even when he would become an apprentice she wasn't going to spoon feed him. He needed to solve things on his own. It had never been her style to give the answer. That would only hinder Bosie's growth. As for Bosie becoming an apprentice? She wasn't exactly saddened by the thought. In fact, she was rather excited. They were able to do more things together. Most importantly he wouldn't feel trapped. When he became an apprentice his world would become broad. He would stumble many times to find the right path for him, but she would be here for him. Just as many others had been there for her, she would be there for him. Even if she was stumbling through life herself.

Now, with Sedgeroot's question answered she would have to come up with her own. There was so much she wanted to ask, but she didn't want to overload the queen. Many things would be learned through experience and she was aware of that. Right now she was struggling from the lack of experience and references to go off of. She never had a normal kithood after all. Her father had been the one to raise her. She knew the love of a father, not the love of a mother. Still, she needed to ask an important question. Just one that she needed to bring her mind at peace. "How do you know if you're doing okay as a parent?" Maybe they'd laugh at her. Maybe they'd look at her as if she asked the strangest question. However, she really wanted to know if she was doing okay. What makes a good parent?

Taking part in the raffle!

So many things to do, so little time. Everyone was working themselves to the bones despite the heat and starvation. She admired that about them. Even when everything was becoming ugly they still stood and put up a fight. Although, she couldn't fault the daylight warriors that returned back to their two-legs and never returned. Many would call it cowardice for running back to the protection of their two-leg owners, but she couldn't hate them. Daylight warriors had their own two-legs and kittypet friends. She had seen some of them quite fond of their two-legs. How they would allow themselves to be touched and cared for. It was strange to her. Allowing herself to be vulnerable and have these two-legs touch her. However, the daylight warriors were actually doing them a service by returning to their owners. Daylight warriors were well fed and taken care of by their two-legs, so if they were to stay with their two-legs that would mean more food for the clan. Not to say she wanted them out of the clan, but things were difficult during these trying times. It's not like they could spare food to any outsiders at a time like this. No matter how much they wanted to. Unless they were a kit. If they were a kit they would spare food. Funny, how they still upheld morals during these times. Cats would grumble at the prospect of having another mouth to feed, but they wouldn't allow a kit to starve. If a she-cat in the clan were to announce they were expecting kits everyone would pull in together and help out. Some may initially say that the she-cat was out of her mind for having kits at a time like this, but what's done is done. It's not like they could or would strip a she-cat of her kits.

Kits... She'd always loved kits and all the things she did. Her fascination became appreciation. Appreciation at the sheer fact that these kits were not alone. These kits would have others to support them and bicker with. Bickering could lead to fondness or it could end in distrust. It really depended on how the two cats interacted with each other and gave each other a chance. In this world it's impossible to become friends with everyone. Toleration is more tangible, along with hatred. Hatred is what made her rethink her place in this clan. Unlike many of the cats here she didn't bear a grudge against the city cats. Even if she heard the atrocities the other clan committed she still had faith in them. She held onto the idea that there were cats that were good. Even if everyone called her foolish or crazier than a fox in a fit! It didn't matter to her. She didn't want to become blind. To allow herself to be moved by hatred and act accordingly. Allowing herself to become moved by such an emotion would bring regrets. She wouldn't be able to live with herself if she attempted to hate others because she feared what Skyclan would do to her if she didn't follow the norm.

Normality wasn't used to describe her. The description she liked the most came from Sedgeroot. A kind tom that helped her figure out some things about parenthood. He had described her as the mist. The mist was a mysterious thing. Around these parts such a phenomenon was scarce. Dare she say that she never experienced it. If she did she couldn't remember. Not like it mattered now. Seeing and experiencing mist wasn't at the top of her list. Lately her mind became muddled with many things. Her life was changing in so many ways. Her relationship with Juniperstar was going through changes. Her responsibilities were shifting due to taken in Bosie. Her free time was becoming limited as the days past. There was just so much going on that trying to tackle them all at once would only do more harm than good. What she needed to focus on was Bosie and Juniperstar. These two cats were important to her. She wanted the best for them, even if it meant sacrificing her free time for them. Sedgeroot had told her that she needed to talk to them and he was right. All she had been doing was running away from what was really important.

Dreams became a common occurrence in turn. These dreams were wishful thinking. She'd imagine Bosie becoming a wonderful warrior and Juniperstar cheering him on. That the three of them would become a true family. Did she imagine any other kits? No, she didn't. For her it wasn't important. She had Bosie right now and she wasn't ready for kits. Especially during a time like this? She didn't want to put anymore strain on Skyclan by having kits. She also didn't want her kits to suffer during this time. She didn't know what she'd do if they didn't survive. Ah, she couldn't bear to think about it. Besides, the decision to have kits wasn't hers alone to make. Juniperstar would also have to be interested and okay with it. In all honesty she didn't mind not having of their flesh and blood. If they just had Bosie that was more than enough for her. To experience motherhood and be able to help Bosie grow was all she needed. One experience was better than none. Funny, how much she'd learned over the past days when it came to parenthood. The cats she became accustomed to and the strengthening bonds between them. Now she can proudly say that she would protect Slatekit with her life. Not because they were a kit and needed protection, but because they were Sedgeroot's kin. A friends kin. Just as Sedgeroot would look after Bosie, she would look after Slatekit.

What she didn't expect was a starry form coming to visit her in her dreams. She knew this cat very well. It was none other than Lavenderstar. She couldn't say she was afraid of them anymore. Maybe it was because of all that was happening that she couldn't bring herself to be nervous. I'm sure your proud that he's become leader now. He hasn't said anything about it, but I'm sure he saw you and Heronstar. Unlike the many times they've met, she greeted Lavenderstar as an old friend opposed to a superior. A smile and a wave of her paw. She wasn't that close to be able to hug the great Lavenderstar, but she hoped the leader was pleased by these developments. After all, they were family. If Lavenderstar was watching she would know that Arcticwind had taken in a kit.

"Hello Lavenderstar," she finally called out. I wonder if you're happy seeing him become leader. Ah, those thoughts were not meant for her. As curious as she may be, that wasn't for her to know. That was private between mother and son. "Is there something you wanted to talk about? Or did you happen to enter the wrong cats dream?" Her last remark ended with a chuckle. A little joke in these trying times. In this dream they could pretend just a little while that nothing was going wrong after all. The body may deteriorate, but the soul must remain strong. With a sheepish smile, she continued, "I've been wanting to ask you something. If you've really gone to the wrong cat, then feel free to leave. I'd rather not force you to talk to me. All I wanted to ask is about parenthood. I'm sure you've seen Bosie. If not, my apologizes. I shouldn't have assumed."

myth   LAVENDERSTAR

Ah yes, the alliance between Thunderclan and Windclan. To be honest she had forgotten about them. Skyclan had been undergoing its own tragedies that she couldn't say she remembered the other clans. Perhaps she may have been foolish for forgetting them, but all the clans were trying to survive this massive heat and starvation. Wherever anyone went it was unbearably scorching. Solace only came at night when the sun would go down. While she had been blessed with short fur and a light pelt, that didn't mean she couldn't feel the heat. The reality was that she did feel the heat, but focusing on it would only cause her to feel even warmer. She distracted herself by going on patrols or staying with Bosie. To focus on the horrid only would bring my spirits down. Anyone's spirit would be severed if they continued to think only of the terrible. Advice that was easier said than done. Hunger, dehydration, the increase of illness, and the unbearable heat was more than enough to make any cat break. How could one find light in this time of darkness? She couldn't answer that question, for she believed the light could only be found by an individual.

"...what is the point of an alliance if one Clan isn't willing to fight alongside their ally?"

She disagreed with him there. Having an ally didn't always require violence. An ally could fight alongside them, but in times like these... She couldn't see anyone fighting. Maybe if the situation got worse and everyone lost their minds she could see it. Why would the clans fight? Many of the cats were now malnourished and exhausted. Fighting wouldn't do anyone good. Fighting would only bring the end much sooner. Fighting right now isn't a concern Juniper. I know that it's important for allies to fight alongside each other, but I with how things are now... Normally she'd keep shut about these things, but with the state of how things were now she couldn't help herself. Although, she wasn't sure if she was allowed to bring her input on the table. Yes they were mates, but that didn't mean she agreed with him all the time. They were both very different and that was okay. However, she will say it is quite odd to speak up to Juniperth- Juniperstar. Maybe with time sh would become accustomed to him holding meetings.

"I... I don't think fighting alongside each other should be of importance," she called out. Ah, this was awkward. Speaking up to him of all cats. She wasn't trying to offend him or anything, but this was just strange. They were not equals in this situation. In this situation he was her superior and she just needed to adjust to that. "Cats are increasingly growing ill. The heat is unbearable. We're running out of prey. All of us are beyond exhausted in one way or another. We're... We're also mourning Heronstar. I think we should try to work together with our allies to find resources. We're all trying to survive. No clan wants to die out." She could only hope that the others didn't become offended by her reasoning, or that they were upset she spoke out of line. The reality of the situation was that this was a race against time. How much longer till all the prey was gone? She was sure that many Skyclanners wouldn't become kittypets in order to save themselves until conditions got better. All the clans would have become kittypets if it hadn't been for their pride. Pride is what brought them together. In life and death. Together they would overcome and together they would be overwhelmed.

Anyhow, they moved onto happier news. Small happiness that is. A new mentor and apprentice pair. She had heard Ryepaw's mentor had stepped down, but what could they do? Sometimes life didn't work out and mentors had to be changed. What she didn't expect was for her own name to be called. To think, that after two leaders she would finally be given an apprentice. One would call it saddening for her to receive one so late, but she couldn't say she was upset. Nervous most definitely. Eyes wide as saucers she glanced at Ryepaw. She didn't exactly converse with the apprentice, but she did know who their mother was. Heronstar, their former leader. To be given a leader's child as her first apprentice was an honor alright. No sarcasm intended. She had nothing against Heronstar whatsoever. In fact, she rather liked the former leader.

Perhaps she should have been paying attention. Before she realized it, Ryepaw had approached her. The moment they touched noses with her she flinched and glanced side to side in panic. The words Ryepaw told her barely registered in her mind. It was obvious to tell that she was nervous at being given her first apprentice. So much so she could only murmur a pathetic, "Y-y-yeah. Me too. L-let's do our best." With that Ryepaw took their place back in the crowd and she let out a sigh of relief. The moment was over and she no longer had to worry. For now at least. However, as the meeting proceeded she was drawn away from it. A thought played her. Heronstar I'll do my best. Even if I end up being hated by Ryepaw, I'll try to support her anyway I can. I hope... I hope you're okay with someone like me being your daughter's apprentice.

"The new deputy of SkyClan shall be Mothshine."

Started she was, the announcement snapping her out of her thoughts. She heard other cats chanting Mothshine's name In a rush she chanted, "Mothshine! Mothshine! Mothshine!" Once the chanting was all said and done with, she began to truly comprehend what happened. Juniperstar had chosen Mothshine as their new deputy. His dearest friend. She couldn't say that she disapproved of him picking Mothshine because Mothshine is what they needed in times like these. When the going got tough, Mothshine was always fighting for a better future. If it was Mothshine, then Skyclan would be alright. Besides, the deputy needed to make sure the leader was alright too. What cat was better than Mothshine to watch out for Juniperstar? And no, the answer is not Arcticwind.

Here she was again at the two-leg place. This is where she'd found Bosie and she didn't regret finding him or taking him in. No, that was a decision she would never regret. Even if she was young and still had plenty of growing up to do she wasn't going to let Bosie go. She held on for him. While he may have not had the greatest beginnings he could at the very least make the best of the rest of his life. Whether or not he decided to stay or leave the clan. All she really wanted was his happiness, just as she wished happiness for Juniperstar. Whether that happiness meant to be with someone else, she would be okay. It would hurt, but she would be grateful nevertheless to have met him and be with him for awhile. Anyhow, she had returned to this place to think. Think about Bosie. He was on her mind most of the time and she couldn't tell if that was a bad thing or a good thing. It's strange how much a kit is able to change a person. She never thought she would have a family, so all these thoughts were terrifying to her. The need to be by Bosie's side grew, but then her fear of being tied down came to bite her. With Juniperstar, he understood she went off on her own. Juniperstar let her be free when she wanted, but Bosie wasn't the same. She could leave him and go on about her days, but that didn't sit right with her. He would no doubt take it the wrong way. It's just that she rather liked wandering wherever her paws took her. She wasn't sure who she gotten this trait from, but she wasn't going to hurt her brain to guess.

Family wasn't exactly drilled into her. She knew she had a mother and father, but she only knew her father's name. Her father didn't tell her who her mother was and her grandparents. No use in trying to figure out something permanently lost to history, yet she found herself thinking. Her father had been the one to name her all these years... Should I give Bosie a new name? While she may want to that was for Bosie to decide. That was just something they should talk together about. Whether or not he wanted a new name. She just continued on her way and a sound had stopped her.

Crying, She heard crying, but it wasn't from a cat. She knew she should have turned away and left, but she couldn't help herself from checking the source. Cautious she was in her approach. What she had found this time was a two-leg. A two-leg on the floor hunched over with their paws covering their face. Their body was shaking as they sobbed. What a fool I am. Two-legs are weak too. They can cry like us too. Her thoughts distracted her and she stepped on something strange. She would never know what it was, but it was a potato chip bag. Such a sound wouldn't go unnoticed and she found herself frozen as the two-leg lowered its paws to gaze at her. You're sad. What's hurting you? If there was anyone from Skyclan they would yell at her to run or drag her away because of her stupidity. She should have run away a long time ago. Two-legs were dangerous creatures, but when she looked at this two-leg she couldn't see them being dangerous.

Said two-leg's eyes widened and they rushed over to pick her up. "Ren! You're back. Thank goodness. Don't leave me alone again! Please, stay with me. I'll give you all the treats you want. I'm sorry for not being around so much. I know you're angry, but I promise to do better." Whatever this two-leg was saying didn't register in her mind whatsoever, as the language of cats and two-legs were rather different. However, by the way this two-leg was holding her... While it was strange she felt... Needed? When she looked up she saw the two-leg continued to cry with a smile on their face, looking at her as if she was the most important thing in the world. They held her close to their chest. It was unnaturally warm and unnaturally gentle. Still, no matter how unnatural this all was... She hated seeing this two-leg so sad. Without thinking she nestled closer to them and purred. She'd rather give them a hug, but with the way this two-leg was holding them it was impossible.

Away the pair went somewhere. Being held the entire time was more than strange, but she would be lying to say she wasn't enjoying it a little bit. The two-leg brought them inside their den and set her down on the wooden floor. This den is a lot nicer than Bosie's two-legs den.She shook her head. Growing attached to this place and staying here was not good. She needed to leave. The open window would make a clean escape, but the two-leg promptly returned with food and water. Both things were now considered luxuries, as Skyclan struggled to maintain what little water and prey they had. While she was hungry and thirsty, she couldn't take these things. The two-leg seemed to notice her hesitation and nudged the bowl of food and water closer. "Please eat and drink Ren. You're looking like skin and bones. It must be hard out there." Again, she couldn't understand the words coming from the two-leg, but they continued to nudge the bowls towards her. Concern was the only thing she could register from them. I... I shouldn't be doing this, but they look worried. Even though I'm a little scared to eat whatever this brown stuff is. Staring at the two-leg in front of her, she slowly neared the bowls. Water was her first choice, as it was the only thing she was used to. Then, with fear in her eyes she went over to the brown bowl. Just don't think too hard about it. It doesn't look like prey, but remember the daylight warriors eat this. It should be at least okay if they eat it. The rather loud growl let out by her stomach caused the two-leg to laugh, "See? You're hungry Ren. I brought the type you love so much, so I know you can't resist!" While Arcticwind had no idea what the two-leg was saying to her, she was flustered by the sound from her stomach. Anyhow, she proceeded to take a bite of the brown lump. Surprisingly it wasn't that bad. Before she knew it, it was all gone.

The life of kitty-pet and daylight warrior was rather strange and interesting all the same. However, she needed to return. The window looked quite appealing in this moment, but she heard a strange sound. The two-leg was crying again, paws covering their face. Glancing back at the twoleg and the window where the moon was glowing, she sighed. Today she was going to return home later. Just like Bosie had needed her, this two-leg needed her. Drawing near, she took her place on their legs. Bringing her paw to their arm. "I won't leave you alone anymore," she told the two-leg. Of course, the two-leg didn't understand. Their paws lowered and stared at her with shock. Not a moment later was she pulled into a hug by this two-leg. A gesture she returned by nuzzling against them. What the other's thought back in Skyclan was at the back of her mind. She shouldn't let those things ruin the moment.

A warrior and a crying two-leg. Did this look strange to anyone? Whatever the case, the two-leg put her down and patted her head before going off somewhere. This left her all alone to process what happened. Sadness. They're all alone too. Surely its lonely to be by oneself. Those days where she hid from everyone else and wanted to know them, yet she feared them as well. Everyday she would be left alone in that den with nothing but shadows to talk to. At the time it was enough, but she had been fooling herself. The company her shadow could bring compared to other cats was far from the same. Footsteps drew near and her ears perked. When she looked up she saw the two-leg holding something. It didn't take her long to realize that this was a collar. It did take her long to realize that she shouldn't have allowed this two-leg to put it on her, yet the smile on their face... I want you to be happy too.

Collars felt strange. It didn't hurt, but it was cool? She didn't know how to explain it well. What matters is that it was different. What also matters the most is that it didn't hurt. Not a moment later the two-leg's smiling face was next to her, "You left before putting this on. I know you don't like it, but it's for your safety. When you get lost others will be able to bring you back to me. I love you Ren." Ren? That was the only thing she was able to register, as the two-leg had been repeating the word endlessly. Is that my name? Well... It's not my name, but it's not like we can understand each other. Ren, huh? If she's happy calling me that... Then being Ren for them is fine by me. Eventually the pair went to another room. The two-leg placed her on something soft and took their place beside them. "I'm happy you came back Ren." And then the two-leg drifted off, slumber taking them away. Safe to say she waited a little bit longer to make sure the two-leg was actually sleeping before she left. Out through the window and into the night. She wasn't a daylight warrior and she had two toms waiting for her. Her son Bosie and her mate Juniperstar. Thankfully the night meant that many kittypets were sleeping or inside with their two-legs. She was able to return to camp by moon-high. It was still pretty bad, especially when she returned with a collar around her neck. There was going to be a lot of explanations, which were going to end up with them scolding her.

What was she thinking? She had a kit now! She couldn't go off to see this two-leg because they were sad! Yet... She would argue that it was possible to make time for this two-leg, but that would mean she would be busy. Her free time would be gone. That was okay. She just wanted to see the two-leg that called her Ren smile. Without a doubt everyone would note the stench of two-legs clinging onto her, which she was fully aware of. Her day had been long and she wanted nothing more than to go to bed. "I'll explain it in the morning," she mumbled. She didn't want them assuming things that were completely wrong after all.

// TLDR: Arcticwind was taken in by a two-leg, mistaken as their kittypet. Arcticwind decides to stay and keep this two-leg company because they're lonely too. She receives the name Ren by the two-leg and is given a collar with the name Ren etched into it and other words she'll never understand. Arcticwind returns to camp at midnight reeking of the two-leg she spent time with and a collar around her neck.

^{FAMILY HISTORY | ◜ ALL I WORSHIP AND ADORE◞}

Already there was a misunderstanding. Then again she couldn't fault them for it. With how things looked it was easier to lump her in with cats that had given up and sought refuge with two-legs. She wouldn't say she found refuge with the two-leg that held her tight. It was the other way around actually. Surprisingly. The food and water were okay, but she hadn't really thought about staying for that reason. If she were to stay it would to keep the two-leg company. Chirpchime did have a point though. With how things were and the fact that she was taking care of a kit... Many would think she was going to a two-leg's den in order to keep her strength up for her kit. Even though she was perfectly fine suffering with everyone else. It's not like she could bring them kittypet food. Well... She could, but it wouldn't be well received by her clan mates. Far from being well received.

Yes, it was true she didn't need to explain. Explain what really happened, but she knew others would make up stories about her. Tell lies and she would rather have the truth come to light. Starclan forbid the rumors would lead to Bosie being bullied or something. While she was far from perfect and made too many impulsive decisions, her heart was in the right place. That's why she looked at Chirpchime with a smile, "You're right. I don't have to, but I want to regardless. I'm not there for the food or water after all." Then what was she there for? My secret.

Then came the topic of staying with that two-leg for good. Without missing a beat she answered, "No. I've never planned on moving there for good before or now." As harsh as it may have sounded it was the truth. Yes, she did go to this two-leg den and gained a collar out of their exchange, but she wasn't planning on spending her life behind walls. The safety and care was nice, but she needed her freedom. Freedom to go on strolls and think for awhile. "There's something I need to do there now, so I'll be spending more time there. Until they're strong enough, and then I'll be able to leave. I just have to manage my time better," she added. She wasn't being specific whatsoever, but if anyone knew her... They would have an inkling that she was off helping someone again. She always did things at her own pace that it could be frustrating. Just wait until Juniperstar saw her with a collar around her neck.

Poor Juniperstar might be getting the wrong ideas. Thinking she might leave him with a kit in order to be with two-legs or something like that. An irrational thought, but she couldn't control his mind. Even if she wanted to scream at him that would never happen. She loved him and Bosie too much. It would be cruel to adopt Bosie and then leave him with Juniperstar because she was helping a two-leg. The allure that came from the life of a daylight warrior and kittypet didn't charm her. Certainly fascinating, but not for her. Oh wait... I have to mentor Ryepaw too. Ah, what will she think when her mentor shows up with a collar around their neck? Some role model I am. She grimaced at Ryepaw's reaction. Training would have to occur one way or another, so eventually Ryepaw would see it. However, a question came to the front of her mind. What should I teach Ryepaw?

dropping this mess here

Chirpchime was certainly different from most cats. Not that she had a problem with the other molly. There no reason to be upset or spiteful towards them. Some may argue that simply flaunting their fabulous presence was offensive. Chirpchime could do as she pleased. Even though the molly bore a glittering collar with strange rocks attached to them, she still considered them a clanmate all the same. Chirpchime still bothered to show up after all. No one was forcing the molly to come back, considering what was going on with the clans. If Chirpchime decided to return to her twolegs that was fine. She wouldn't lash at them. In trying times like these anything goes some may argue. At the very least Chirpchime wouldn't be eating crowfood. Why couldn't the other cats within the clan look past that?

It was simple. Suffering clouded the mind and led to resentment. Without a doubt she would see in the future that those who left would be resented for their decision. To have the gall to come back after everyone endured suffering. Even now she was unsure if she would survive herself.Unlike Juniperstar she only had one life. There was no telling what was going to happen today or the days to come. She didn't want to think about it. The what ifs and the could haves. In a time like this the best course of action was to continue to pave the way you wanted. That's why. No matter how much of a mess she was, she continued this path of hers.

There was going to be a day. A day when this path comes to an end. Her path will be judged. Judged by the dead, if they were still around that is. After all, Starclan was fading away. Who was to say when she passed there will still be a Starclan? Either way, she would accept the end. Wherever she ended up she will accept in turn. At the very least she lived her life with no regrets. The future was uncertain, but she wasn't going to give up like this. Giving up meant that she wouldn't be able to see a tomorrow where Bosie grew up to be a warrior or a medicine cat. In these troubling times he was her light. Her sun. Every time she saw it rise she would always smile. We've made it another day.

Another day where she could hunt or go on patrols. She had risen with the sun and would go on the dawn patrol. She loved going on dawn patrols. The sight it brought was lovely, but it also gave her time to do other things. One of them being helping the queens and elders. Lately she considered herself a bit of a nursery helper sticking to the nursery, but that was to be expected. Her son was being looked after by one of the many queens within the nursery. As she wasn't expecting or was even considering how kits in the future she couldn't wean him. Not that she needed to anyways. He was old enough to eat prey, so she brought him and the others whatever she could. It wasn't much in the grand scheme of things, but it was something.

She was following Astralpaw, considering she was going on a hunting patrol with the apprentice. Their group was rather small, but that was a given. Not many cats particularly enjoyed waking up early, nor did many cats have the strength to go hunting anymore. It seemed that Astralpaw wasn't really fond of the idea of Chirpchime coming along with them, which made sense. The patrol was practically set. However, more cats meant a better chance of catching something. That's why when they passed Chirpchime she gave the molly a smile and a wave of her paw in greeting. "Good morning Chirpchime. I hope you've rested well." Hopefully that was taken as a snide comment or something. She'd really hate it if the molly misunderstood her. She genuinely hoped that they were able to get some rest due to how hectic things had been nowadays. "We're going on a hunting patrol. Would you like to come? If not, we'll have to be heading off. The clan can't feed itself you know," she chuckled. A little joke to lighten the mood. Hopefully that would ease the weird tension between Chirpchime and Astralpaw.

The only death she heard was that of her father. She didn't know anyone else in her family. The faces and names weren't something she was told about. How could she feel any sort of sadness for cats she never met? If she did feel a twinge of sadness it would be not knowing them. They could be kittypets. They could be rogues. They could be daylight warriors and so on and so on. Whoever they were she hoped that they were content. Maybe they were even watching over her. Who knows. What she did know was that her apprentice was mourning. After all, Heronstar's passing was quite recent. That's why she didn't start training with Ryepaw yet. The apprentice just needed some time to mourn. Forcing someone to train when they weren't in the best state of mind never worked out. Mistakes were made and said apprentice could hurt themselves. She really didn't want that for them. She would feel like she let Heronstar down allowing their daughter to be hurt during training for not listening to her emotional needs.

Now that she thought about it... Would Bosie mourn for if she died? Who would comfort him when she was gone? Who would look after him and ensure that he had a future which he desired? Ah, she was spiraling. Those were questions better left in the darkness. Right now she needed to focus on Ryepaw. The next steps for the two of them. Whether it be starting effective immediately per Ryepaw's request or holding off another week. She would ask her apprentice tomorrow. Today was not the day for this conversation. Figuring that she wasn't close to Heronstar or Ryepaw, she didn't see the point in going to comfort Ryepaw. There were others more suited for that. To her, it would be rude of her to go and try to comfort Ryepaw. If she was going to comfort them and Heronstar's numerous children it would be when she knew both parties well enough. That's why... For now she would watch them at a distance.

arc's the best at climbing trees, but would never push someone off it. falling out of trees is actually dangerous. would play fair and square and would probably lose as a result. will also lose to check on someone who fell off the tree, because it would suck if someone got broken bones out of this.

arc's pretty decent with hunting. not the best of the best, but she's alright. really her expertise is climbing trees and navigation. she's more of a scout type in a group.

as for beauty contests? arc doesn't consider herself beautiful. she really doesn't know where she falls on the beauty spectrum, so she could be a judge or something? no bribes allowed though