Posts by Floral Frolic

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James and Carbon walked through the wide, double doors of the establishment nearly side by side, coming to a stop before the hostess stand that waited for anyone who happened to come inside. There wasn't anybody there when they first approached, but from what James could see, it looked to be a smaller, family-run sort of business anyway. Either way, they didn't have to wait for too long before a petite girl who looked an interesting mix of nervous and professional walked up to the stand and reached underneath for a few menus, flashing a smile their way. James guessed that it was her age giving her that sort of look, since she was obviously younger than he and Carbon were. She quickly asked the usual question of how many would be eating, and James held up his index and middle fingers to signify the number, attempting to stifle a yawn. His exhaustion was beginning to catch up with him, now that he'd been given a chance to relax.

They were lead to a booth seat, which Carbon hopped into eagerly, quickly making himself comfortable against the wall. James took the seat on the opposite side of the table, both to allow the younger man to stretch out his legs if he wanted, and also because he didn't want to get kicked in the thigh, which had happened before, and would certainly happen again. He thanked the girl as she set a menu down before each of them, and opened it to begin looking over the items they served here. His gut reaction to Carbon's insistence on paying was to argue, but he bit down that response, and instead looked up across the table to the other man, his gaze hooded and a wicked grin pulling up his lips. "Is that a promise?" he purred, although they weren't given much time to continue that line of conversation, given that a familiar voice was being thrown their way.

It took him a minute to place the man that was standing next to their table, a surprised smile upon his face, but it was the voice more than anything that triggered the memory. James had gone to high school with Jesse and his brother Jacob for almost all four years, until their parents had decided to move away their senior year. He couldn't help but to laugh when Carbon said to the man how he recognized the difference between the twins, and refused to admit to the fact that what he said was actually true. Carbon had mentioned it to James one time when he'd asked the younger how he'd managed to tell them apart almost immediately, even though it'd taken everyone else in the school at least several weeks to get the hang of it. He hated to admit that it worked, despite how funny it actually was. In the present, he simply greeted the man before ducked his head to the side, snickering at the events unfolding, especially as Jacob came into view, almost losing it at the sight before him.

"Hey, Jacob," he said in response to the newcomer's wave, turning his attention back to the menu to make his selection, rolling his eyes to himself as Carbon demanded the spiciest thing that he could get his hands on. Typical. Jesse's words, directed at him, however, made James look back up at the twin. He didn't miss the wink that his boyfriend threw his way, especially since it was accompanied by a light kick to his foot. "What's this 'they', huh?" he asked, a teasing lilt to his voice as he narrowed his eyes at the younger man, sparkling with mischief. "There better only be one nerd making you horny," he finished, kicking back at the man's foot in retaliation.

Still smiling, he looked back up to Jesse. "Thank you, though, man," he said with a light laugh. "I think I'll have this," he hummed, before ordering some sort of burrito combo that he'd barely even looked over in the midst of the chaos that the two men had suddenly brought to their table. It didn't matter much, though. James wasn't too picky when it came to food. As for a drink, he stuck to simple water. His head felt alright for now, but he was surely dehydrated as hell, and definitely didn't need to down any sodas after his binge drinking from earlier.

ooc;; i,,, love them. these boys are good boys <3

but oh yes, they better enjoy these good times

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

A deep red blush immediately took over James' features - which Carbon knew would happen, that asshole - and his knee-jerk reaction was to lift his foot and kick the younger man. He did have enough forethought to aim higher in an attempt to make solid contact with the man's shins, though. "Shut the fuck up, you absolute deviant," he hissed, shutting his menu with an air of finality and sliding it over to the outer edge of the table. Despite all his years of being close to Carbon, James never adapted the younger's apparent innate ability to feel comfortable with and confident in his sexuality in public. He had no problems with telling people that they were dating, as well as hand-holding and other light forms of PDA, but he absolutely drew the line at airing out all their. . . kinks for the world to see. He supposed that he shouldn't have expected anything less, though. Ever since they'd met, Carbon had practically lived to push his buttons and embarrass him.

His face was still practically beet red, but he managed to turn his attention to Jesse and the man's declaration with a raised, curious eyebrow. It felt strange, talking like this with two people that they hadn't seen in several years, since before Carbon and James moved away themselves at the end of high school. Did everyone in school think they were into one another? James would love to argue and tell Jesse that he was crazy but, apparently, he'd missed quite a few years of Carbon's attraction to him, so it was always possible that he was just that dense. Honestly, that take was pretty funny coming from the twins in particular, since they left when James and Angela had still been together. They'd missed the entire breakup fiasco, which, honestly, had been the talk of the school for quite a while in their senior year. One of his only positive memories of that time was the fact that quite a few people turned their back on the bitch when it came out that she'd been a cheating, lying whore.

Still, he didn't comment as Jesse walked away, sighing heavily at the man's words. His mood took a pretty quick turn for the better, however, when he glanced at Jacob to catch the movement of his hands. Luckily, he didn't have food in his mouth like Carbon, who'd obviously come quite close to actually choking. If they'd been sitting on the same side of the booth, James would have clapped his hand roughly against the man's back with a laugh. As it was, though, he just grinned widely at Jacob, chuckling even as the man took their menus and walked away. It'd been a long time since he'd gotten the chance to interact with the brothers, and it was a surprising breath of familiar, fresh air.

Once their drinks arrived, James forewent the use of the waiting straw, and instead sipped lightly at his water from the rim of his glass, inclining his head slightly as he listened to Carbon speak. "It absolutely was not worth it," he protested with a shake of his head, placing his water back down to lean slightly over the table towards his boyfriend. Yeah, Mrs. Macquire had been an absolute bitch of a teacher and had deserved every bit of defiance that Carbon threw her way, but the consequences weren't exactly - in James' opinion - worth the moment of self satisfaction and pride that it brought. However, if after that moment, James happened to keep a stash of shirts in his locker, then that was nobody's business besides his and Carbon's.

"Jacob's not the only one who hasn't changed much," he finally mused with a light smile. "Jesse's pretty much the same, too. Always talking so loud with you." It was an observation he'd frequently made in the past, and still found viable now. He and Jacob had often went off on their own, either to the cafeteria, gym, schoolyard, or wherever whenever the other two got over-involved in some sort of bullshit conversation that James couldn't remember the contents of if he tried. He and Jacob were quite similar in that regard; always fondly exasperated at Carbon and Jesse. He hadn't had many friends outside of Carbon, but the twins were two that the both of them happened to get decently close to in their time together at the same school. Seeing them here now sent a strong wave of nostalgia through him.

But, a hotel and a chance to lay down on a fancy bed sounded just about heavenly right now. Carbon mentioned price, but James had no doubt in his mind that either of them - but the younger man, especially - would have no problems with laying down the required funds. Even if he hadn't been able to afford it, James might be willing to put himself in a bit of debt for a nice place to pass out. Good thing he didn't have to worry about that, though. "Only if you sleep with me," he said, immediately tossing a 'do not' glance in the younger man's direction, knowing that he'd want to interpret it in a different way than James met. The fact was; Carbon was surely just as exhausted as he was. And, while he did fear the man going to sleep and being plagued by a burning nightmare, he'd also caught fire in the middle of their kitchen, fully awake. It was most likely that, at this point, sleep wasn't the determining factor. "I wanna cuddle, baby," he continued, unable to resist pleading, just a bit. He really did have an urge to hold Carbon close in his arms for a few hours, after all.

ooc;; they deserve a little rest <3

before more pain

it makes the pain better later lmao

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James would absolutely, without a doubt, make sure that Carbon planted his ass on their hotel bed and stayed there until morning, even if it was the last thing he ever did. The nudging feeling of fear that pushed against the back of his mind was certainly there, and growing in intensity every time the thought of the younger man slipping into a nightmare went through his mind, but he ignored them as best as he could. He had to. From the way things looked now, this little curse was allowing Carbon the chance to sleep, while putting other aspects of his life at risk. They'd have to be careful in public, in the car, or anywhere, really. But at least the man might actually be able to get some rest. He put on airs and acted like everything was fine very well, but James could see him slipping. Even his usual, subconscious fidgeting movements were slow and sluggish, a sure sign of complete exhaustion. At this point, James was more worried about his boyfriend just dropping dead from sleep deprivation, rather than catching on fire.

Still, he tried to put it all out of his mind for now to eat and enjoy both his meal, as well as his time with Carbon. Both Jesse and Jacob periodically came by, taking a few seconds whenever they could to joke around, especially about James and Carbon's brand new relationship. "Are you fucking serious? You had your heads in your asses for that long? God, you're both dumb," Jesse'd said, when he was told that they'd actually only gotten together a few days ago. He'd ended up walking away mumbling something about a blind person seeing things better than them, and James had just laughed. Yeah, they'd been kind of dumb, hadn't they? It was still weird to think that other people believed they'd get together, or were into one another, but they'd figured it out and gotten there eventually.

"God, you're such a masochist," James chuckled, shaking his head in what would have been disbelief if he weren't so familiar with Carbon as the man worked his way through his food. He could absolutely smell how spicy it was, even from the other side of the table, and knew that he himself would hate it. James was mostly indifferent to spicy foods, but they certainly weren't his favorite. He could usually handle a normal amount of heat, but anything that anybody considered normal would never be enough for Carbon. He'd definitely stick to his usual fare; the sort that didn't make his tongue feel like it was going to fall off. "No thanks," he said with a grin when the younger man spoke of offering a taste to James. "I prefer my meals to be tear-free." As he spoke, he reached for the dessert menu, holding it to the side of his plate with one hand while his eyes glanced over the items they offered.

They took the time to finish their food; Carbon crying the way through his overly spicy dish, and James enjoying the hell out of his pain-free burritos. Jesse came by the table once more not too long after they'd both eaten their last bites, conveniently asking about dessert choices. "He wants ice cream," he replied, inclining his head to the side to gesture to Carbon, a light grin upon his face. "Which is understandable. I would too, after that," he teased. It was beyond obvious that the younger man had been crying. He'd wiped the tears themselves away, but his eyes and face were reddened. "I want to try those churros," he finished with a hum. His sweet tooth knew no bounds, so a sugar-rolled pastry was right up his alley.

ooc;; *ominous music plays*

another subpar mobile post <33 i am sorry

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

After Jesse left, the desserts that'd been ordered written down, James kept a close eye on Carbon. The younger man had been particularly silent, staring to the side at the wall, his eyes lidded and unfocused. It was. . . concerning, to say the least. James knew that the man could occasionally go still and silent which, although usually worrying on its own, wasn't also accompanied by extreme exhaustion as well as the stress of this hell that they were currently making their way through. As much as James would love to pretend that this trip was for fun and to put all his worries out of his mind, he couldn't do so completely. So instead he settled for watching, observing, protecting, just like he always tried to do. Part of the reason he was so good at reading Carbon, after all, was because his frequent proximity - as well as his attraction - allowed him plenty of opportunities to watch.

Their desserts didn't even take half the time that their meals had to prepare, and James was happy to see his boyfriend blink back to awareness as the dishes were set in front of each of them. Jacob had been the one to bring them out, and he thanked the man with a grin, which was easily returned. James was. . . happy. He loved sweet food more than was probably good for him, which is why he was glad that he enjoyed healthy food and physical activity just as much. He didn't want to turn into a total slob, after all, just because he enjoyed what could likely be considered a more-than-occasional treat. And the churros he'd ordered were definitely a treat, accompanied by the chocolate sauce and caramel drizzle that covered them. He'd do well to not eat too many of these, just because of how overindulgent they appeared.

He couldn't help but to groan and roll his eyes at the lame pun, although the compliment that it was did make him grin softly. "I guess that means there's a joke somewhere about your love of spicy food and how hot you are?" he asked, a teasing tone in his voice, despite the fact that his boyfriend truly was very hot. "But, I actually take care of my teeth, so they're in perfect health," he hummed with a humored grin after finally taking his first bite. James was absolutely a 'brush at least twice a day, mouthwash, and floss' sort of person, although that wasn't necessarily directly in connection with his love for sweet food. He just had a tendency to feel whenever his teeth were dirty, and he hated it. He'd actually only ever had one cavity before, and that was way back when he was a kid in elementary school. His parents had lovingly insisted on him getting several fluoride gel treatments at the dentist's office for years after the fact. "What I want to know is how you don't have like. . . ulcers or something from all that spicy shit." Honestly, if James ate as much of that as Carbon did, his stomach would probably never stop hurting. Not to mention the pain his throat, mouth, and tongue would all be in.

As good as they were, James did not finish his plate of churros, mostly because there were just too damn many on the plate for one person. It was definitely meant to serve a party of, likely, two or more, but James didn't mind pushing aside the uneaten portions too much. He caught sight of Elisabeth, the hostess, and made a writing motion with his hand to signal for the check, since she was so far away and neither Jesse nor Jacob were anywhere to be seen. In the distance, he saw her smile and nod before turning away. Carbon said he'd be paying, but that wouldn't stop James from trying to get there first. Honestly, it was an old, tired battle between the two of them, and it was a pretty random toss up as to who would win on any particular day. Although, James might be willing to forfeit, just this once, if the offer of blowing his boyfriend was still on the table. He definitely wouldn't mind that.

ooc;; uh oh, uh oh, the spooky red voice is back bby <3

poor carbon, 1000 degrees is a lot,

the suffering is coming for u <33

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James, as Carbon bent to reach for his boot, presumably to grab for the wallet that he knew the younger man stashed there sometimes, stacked and moved their dishes closer to the edge of the table so that they could be picked up with ease later. "I would never insult your teeth, baby," he hummed with a little laugh, folding up the paper of an unused napkin while they waited for Elisabeth. Of course, Carbon knew this, and James knew that he did too, but it was nice - familiar - to throw insults back and forth and to joke around; irritating one another and then soothing the faux wounds with little, unnecessary balms of kind words. If James was using pet names now more than his boyfriend's actual name, well, he couldn't really help himself.

He was glad that Carbon had given the girl such a large bill, because the sheer delight on her face was enough to make James smile too. Besides, their service had been quick, their food delicious, and seeing Jesse and Jacob again was a nice, welcome surprise. He watched her practically run to the back of the restaurant before turning back to face the younger man. The humor in his gaze shifted to something of confusion, or maybe even shock, when he noticed how. . . red his boyfriend's face was. It certainly wasn't from the spice of his meal, either, since that rise of color and his teary eyes had both faded back to normal as he'd eaten his ice cream. If James didn't know any better he'd say that his boyfriend looked nervous. Embarrassed. Something that was definitely unusual for Carbon, who was almost always shameless and extraordinarily difficult to make blush, no matter the circumstances.

James listened to him speak - or ramble, to be more accurate - with a curious expression, eyebrows raised and mouth hanging open slightly. It was certainly not the sort of thing he'd ever expected to hear from the younger man. Carbon was, in James' mind, always leagues ahead when it came to sex. He was more experienced, more daring, more everything. To have never received a blowjob before? It almost sounded like a lie, he was having so much trouble believing it. To James, in his own experience, blowing someone and getting blown were both introductory sex acts. Angela had given head to him before, and it was actually the first thing he'd done with a man after breaking up with the bitch, just because he'd wanted something markedly different than anything she could have offered him. And he'd enjoyed it. Immensely so, actually. Maybe that was the switch in him talking but, well, he still struggled to believe that Carbon had never gotten one, not even once.

"Are you. . . actually nervous right now?" he finally asked once the other had fallen silent, but the question wasn't to make fun of Carbon, nor even to tease. It was gentle. He was just so surprised that it had sprung past his lips, as if he had to make sure. But, of course the man was. His cheeks were bright red and he was obviously avoiding meeting James' eyes. "I'm honestly shocked. You're usually so much more experienced than me." he mused, his voice quiet to match Carbon's, even though there was nobody around them at the moment. "But y'know, you wouldn't be making me do anything. We can forget about it if you really want to, I don't mind either way. I told you I wanted to cuddle," he hummed, leaning back in the booth with a shrug of one shoulder, a foot lifting up under the table to make a nudge of contact with the other man. "But, in my opinion, the top can do whatever he damn well pleases, so if you ever want to try it out, that's fine too." Finished with that little spiel, he stood from the booth and shoved one hand in his pocket as he looked toward Carbon. "Ready to go?" The last thing he wanted to do was make the younger man uncomfortable, so if he really did want to forget the whole thing, then James was fine with that. He'd never mention it again. However, he couldn't let the man pass by the opportunity on the premise that it 'wasn't what bottoms do', either.

ooc;; owO ??

is james actually more experienced in something sex related ??

its like a miracle! <3

poor nervous bby carbon lmao

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

He felt a little bad about bailing on the twins without a proper goodbye, but they'd actually managed to speak with each other multiple times throughout their dinner, and James was really beginning to feel the absolute exhaustion catching up to him. Carbon was absolutely right that he and Jesse would end up going on for hours once they started really talking, and James didn't feel like passing out on a bench waiting for them to finish. Even with Jacob - who definitely had always made for good company - around, he doubted that he'd be able to stay conscious for much longer. With that being said, James didn't want Carbon forcing himself to stay awake, either. He could see the weariness just dragging the younger man down with each passing second, even as he tried to hide it. The sooner they got to a bed, the better.

Discussions about blowjobs and who would give vs receive them notwithstanding, sleep was James' number one priority. Carbon had been good at pushing him past points of exhaustion and into more 'fun' activities before, but nothing of the sort would be happening tonight. James needed at least five hours of sleep before he did anything, and would certainly prefer more. As many as he could get, honestly, especially if his boyfriend managed to fall into a peaceful, restful sleep beside him. They were lucky they'd stopped in such a small town. He was really getting tired of driving around today, and was thankful that the nearest hotel was only down the road a little ways. "My sugar was sufficient," he answered; a usual response to an expected question. Over time, James had fallen into saying that it had either been insufficient or sufficient; satisfactory or unsatisfactory. Any simple, clinical response to mean whether or not he'd enjoyed the dessert. He knew that was what Carbon was really asking.

He reversed out of the parking spot that he'd stopped in and began down the road, as directed, dutifully turning left at the stop sigh. The hotel in question was quite fancy looking, and also happened to be named after a bird of the blue variety. Carbon had been almost spot-on with the name, except that it was Blue Jay, rather than Bluebird. "What billionaire sets up such a huge place in a town like this?" he asked on the tail end of a yawn, glancing around at the place as he drove up to it. This town was small, so he expected smaller, motel variety places to stop for the night, not marble columns, banners, and valets at the end of the road. Although, he supposed that Carbon had said earlier that the hotel was on the pricier side, so he probably should have been prepared for this.

Despite there being valet, James wasn't too keen on using the service. For one, it was overly expensive and he didn't want to pay for it. For another, he didn't like strangers driving his car. Luckily, it didn't appear to be required, and so he simply turned into the parking lot and found a spot himself. It wasn't like they had tons of luggage or anything. James definitely wouldn't mind simply getting a room and passing out for a couple of hours before even bringing anything inside, either, although that probably wasn't the responsible thing to do. "Lets go get a damn bed and sleep," he said, cutting off the engine and stepping out of the vehicle, stretching his arms up above his head as he waited for Carbon to do the same so that he could lock it.

ooc;; you tell him, james <3

listen to ur boyfriend, carbon

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James rounded to the back of the car and reached into the trunk after Carbon to pull out his own suitcase. He set it on the asphalt before roughly shutting the door and clicking the little button oh his key fob that would lock the car up. The younger man was already waiting a little ways ahead of him, so he walked up behind him before they entered the hotel together. It. . . well, it looked like any other fancy hotel, probably. There were smooth leather couches and chairs - not a crack or wrinkle in sight upon them - set out in little groups, glass top tables between them. Ferns and other sorts of plants littered the space, hiding any gaps in the otherwise ostentatious display that James' eyes took note of as he walked across the glossy hardwood flooring up to the front desk. Well, at least the fanciness of the lobby usually directly correlated to how nice the rooms were.

He stopped next to Carbon at the desk, leaning sideways against it with one elbow resting on the top of the counter, his head supported slightly in his hand. At this angle, he could clearly see the man and the woman - Lauren, the name tag hooked to her uniform's black button down vest said - before him and any transactions that would be made between them. The shift in tone between professional and flirtatiousness as her eyes roved over James' form was. . . gross. It was very gross. James didn't like having unnecessary attention on himself, and he definitely didn't enjoy being hit on by complete strangers when he least expected it. At a club or something, where he'd gone in planning to flirt and hopefully get laid, then the attention of strangers was exactly what he'd been looking for. But here, when he was just exhausted and trying to get a hotel room? It was not a welcome advance. Especially now that he was spoken for.

James could have a tendency to clam up when he was caught off guard and unsure how to respond, especially when he was tired and his brain wasn't working at 100%, but luckily Carbon had him covered this time. He snorted at the younger's immediate response, hearing the venom in his tone, clear as day. Under different circumstances, James would elect himself as the mediator in situations like this. An angry Carbon tended to run his mouth with no filter over any scathing thoughts, which landed him in more trouble than necessary. Of course, James tended to get into trouble right alongside him. Especially if anyone was trying to start shit with his best friend. James was a quick thinker with a silver tongue, along with plenty of insults of his own to throw around. He just happened to filter and hold himself back better than Carbon, settling for glares and pulling the younger away as best as he could. His mother wouldn't be happy if she learned James was letting him get into so many arguments and fights, after all.

Still, in this moment, he was really too tired to care. And maybe James had a darker streak than it seemed, because the shock on the woman's - Lauren's, right - face was funny enough that it was worth it. He'd probably do something similar, anyways. She had been flirting, and the both of them were greedy and possessive; James especially. He couldn't fault Carbon for putting her in her place. With a satisfied grin, he held out his hand and let her drop the room key into his waiting palm. They were on. . . the first floor, right? Honestly, James had only been paying half attention, and had missed that little bit of information. He'd figure it out. The elevators were at the beginning of the hall, so either way, they'd have to go left from the check-in desk.

He began rolling his suitcase in that direction, but stopped short, having only gotten a little ways away, when he realized that Carbon wasn't following behind him. He looked back, and saw his boyfriend with an absolutely devastatingly cruel expression on his face speaking to the woman. He couldn't catch the words, but the wrecked look on her face made it pretty obvious the sort of things that Carbon had said. James only shook his head, a crooked grin on his face as the younger man finally walked away from the desk and caught up. "Such an asshole," he said, but there was humor in his tone and he pressed his free hand against his boyfriend's shoulder in the mimicry of a punch. He'd used to actually hit his friend with force, way back in high school and the beginning of college, but Carbon had only ever smiled and laughed, pushing further to egg James on. Now, he only protested to keep up appearances.

Their room was, as to be expected, quite nice. Although, James didn't spend too long admiring the scene. Instead, he dropped his suitcase on the floor right next to Carbon's, and while the younger man fished for his toothpaste and headed to the bathroom, James began shedding his clothing. He dropped his shoes against the wall and removed his pants and shirt, leaving him in only his boxers. He followed after the younger into the bathroom then, taking his place at the sink when Carbon finished up so that he could brush his own teeth. Honestly, he was too tired to even bother with rinsing out his mouth, and instead just swallowed the excess toothpaste in his mouth. It wasn't his favorite thing to do but, well, it was good enough. Carbon's wining went largely ignored - verbally, at least - as James crawled over the bed to his own spot and got comfortable under the covers. "Shut up and go to sleep," he finally purred, pressing himself against the younger man and pulling him closer.

ooc;; carbon is an ass and james says,,, 'this is fine' <3

as to be expected lol horny boy

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

Checking out of their hotel - the Blue Jay, was it? - was, thankfully, much simpler than checking in the night before. The woman who'd hit on him was nowhere to be see, either by the desk or otherwise, and had likely ended her shift and gone home sometime in the early morning hours. A part of him felt bad for her because a nighttime shift? That was rough. But the rest of himself really couldn't get over the discomfort he'd felt thanks to her unnecessary flirting. Had he really even been worth going after at that time, anyway? He must have looked like garbage mulled over with how exhausted he was. Then again, Carbon - who was clearly the more attractive of the two - had a way of scaring people off when he didn't want to deal with any of their shit, so maybe James was just the easier target for a single woman. Either way, the man who took back their room keys was well into his 50s, and gave them no problems as they left.

They were making good progress on their trip. Skipping past any stops that weren't completely necessary would do that, he supposed, but it was a little crazy. Normal people would take at least another day to get as far as they had. Then again, they didn't have that much time to spare. With Carbon's life dangling on the line before them, it was probably for the best to get to Rhode Island and find Riley as quickly as possible. He didn't want to start counting his chickens before they hatched or anything, but they'd just gotten lucky that the younger man hadn't burst into flames again since they'd left home. While on one hand, it was relieving to know that Carbon wasn't in agonizing pain. On the other, each minute that passed by without an incident only served to raise James' anxiety. The more time that passed, the more likely that it could happen the next moment, after all.

Either way, Carbon had said they'd be at their destination before too long, and had offered - well, demanded, to be more accurate - to drive through the night. James wanted to force the issue; to insist that his boyfriend get another night of sleep, but he was scared too. He didn't want to linger around and waste any more time than Carbon did, really. So, he relented, offering the driver's seat to the younger man and switching their places. He'd wanted to keep his boyfriend company and keep an eye on him through the night, but the thing about James: he couldn't stay awake in a car at night to save his life if he wasn't the one driving. The silence of the night and total darkness that was only broken through by the dashboard lights and the ones shining down on the road before them formed the perfect environment for sleeping. Not to mention, the music that was playing through the car's speakers was at a low enough volume to not be distracting, and Carbon himself was silent as well. It was all too easy for James to fall into a light sleep, his arms crossed over his chest and his head leaning to the side against the window. He was lucky that the road they were on was pretty smooth.

He dreamed, although once he woke up, he couldn't remember much of it. Still, he had an itching feeling that it had been a nightmare, which was a far fall from the pleasant dream he'd experienced featuring Carbon that night in the hotel room. His wake-up call had been pretty satisfying then too, although he absolutely would get the younger man back for not allowing James to repay the favor. He wanted so much with his boyfriend; wanted to offer him everything that he could ever want.

'House fire. I'm very sorry to tell you. . . he didn't survive. House caught fire. Didn't survive. Fire. You'd toss away your soul and burn in the fires of hell, just for a roommate? Interesting.'

James finally woke completely with a start, rapidly blinking his eyes to clear away the last of the fog from his sleep, and was surprised to see the light of the sun rising over the trees. He hadn't expected to actually stay unconscious throughout the entire night all the way until morning. He looked over towards Carbon, and was a bit embarrassed about the expectant look he was being given. Ah, he must have missed something being said. Once he got the man to repeat his question, James lightly shook his head. "Not unless you're hungry. Or want to stretch your legs. I'm fine," he said, covering his mouth to hide a yawn. "Glad you didn't crash my car," he hummed, his voice still tired, but obviously teasing as well. "That wouldn't have been fun to wake up to."

He fished around for his phone, locating it underneath his thigh - when did it get there? - and bringing it up to check the notifications. He frowned when a text message from an unknown number caught his attention. 'Where the fuck do you get off, blocking charles?' it read. 'he wont shut the fuck up about the bitch who won't answer him. He even went to your house, and you're not there?' Ah. Liam. It had to be. He was the only person James knew that was so close to Charles as to know his problems like that. As for how he got James' number, well, he didn't know. He kind of wished that he did, because damn, that was fucking annoying.

"When we move, can it be to the middle of fucking nowhere, please?" he grit out, forcefully locking his phone and dropping it somewhere in the middle console between him and Carbon. He was so goddamn tired of all of this. Tired of Charles, tired of Dominic, tired of being bothered by shitty people that both he and his boyfriend had managed to pick up during the course of their lives.

ooc;; he's dealing with so much ;-;

its ok to be spooked bby <3

i couldn't resist reminding james that charles won't be forgotten c;

sorry for the late reply, btw, college is kicking my ass this semester lmao..

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

He was leaning forward in the car, his seat belt pulling tightly against his shoulder as he rested his elbows against his knees. Was he just overreacting? Probably. In the context of all the other shit that James was dealing with in his life right now, Charles' inability to take a hint and fuck off should really have been the least of his concerns. The man had probably just had his number memorized or something, and gave it to Liam when he realized that his own texts and calls weren't getting through to James anymore. It was frustrating and annoying, but not dire. Not as important as his boyfriend. Although, as horrible as it all was - as much as he wished that this wasn't happening - a small, selfish part of himself was glad that the current situation had taken them both away from home. Carbon hadn't seen Charles since... well, since college. And even when James had still been involved, he'd tried his best to make sure the two men never met. He certainly didn't want to break that record now, especially after Carbon's little conversation with the bastard over James' phone.

He tilted his head to the side, his supporting hands shifting from his chin to his cheek as Carbon spoke. "Listen to you, Mr. Smarty-pants. Reading articles? I never thought I'd see the day," he said softly, a small grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. It was an old tease. Carbon had never been the most academic of the two of them; his grades were usually average and his interest in schoolwork had been minimal at best. It was quite the contrast in personality when compared to James, who'd definitely been labeled as a nerd in high school and comfortable with his courses in college. Not to say that his boyfriend wasn't smart, of course; just that he didn't fit into the stereotypical 'nerd' image that James so easily filled. Actually, if one let themselves, it would be easy to forget how intelligent Carbon could actually be. "You're probably right, though," he hummed, turning his glance outward, to the road laid out before them.

There was a tenseness to the air in the car, and if James glanced out the corner of his eyes towards Carbon, he could see the tightness in the man's face, as well as the intensity with which he gripped the steering wheel. James would make a quip about breaking the thing in half if there wasn't something unnerving in his boyfriend's gaze that hushed him into silence. He looked both entirely too focused, yet faraway at the same time. He hated it, and not for the first time, he realized how much hope he had riding on Riley and whatever information the man would have to give them. Would he be able to help Carbon? To fix this... fuck up that James had caused? He certainly - desperately - hoped so, because they were running out of options. James wouldn't quit, even if this amounted to nothing, but Riley's help would certainly make everything so much easier.

Finally, he settled back into the seat, letting his head tip back against the rest and his shoulders droop as Carbon pulled into the lot of a gas station. They weren't far off from their destination, so this would likely be their last stop. Logic would dictate that James get up to stretch his legs and go to the bathroom after sleeping through the night curled up in his car, but he honestly didn't feel like moving. He wasn't comfortable, per say, but he was still feeling sleepy and lazy enough to not want to bother. Besides, the sooner they got going, then the sooner he could be out of the car for - hopefully - a good while. Carbon seemed to feel the same way because it didn't seem like longer than five minutes before he was back in the car. James never pumped gas that quickly, even on the occasional morning he was running late for work. He reached for his phone - finally feeling calm enough to attempt to deal with Liam's shit before they got to Rhode Island - but sudden shouting from Carbon had his hand jerking in surprise and dropping the device into his lap.

He looked over, his eyes wide and startled, to see the distress written clearly across the man's face. He was silenced and shocked still, only blinking, as he listened to Carbon's rambling explanation. He still didn't respond, even as his boyfriend quickly shifted the subject to ask after James' well being. Really, his only thought was that this was all too fucking insane. It was going too far, pushing too much and digging its fingers too deeply into everything of Carbon's: his fate, his life, his thoughts. God, this was all his fault. What a fuck-up. "I'm sorry," he found himself saying, dropping out of his trance to, what, apologize? Fuck. Carbon wouldn't want to hear that, would he. Even if James could fill the rest of his life with apologies, well, it was too late for that now, wasn't it? Besides, there were bigger problems now than James' guilt and shame.

"He won't burn you now. Not while you're driving," he bit out, and where the confidence in the statement was coming from, James didn't know. "It'd hurt me and other people. Even if the fire didn't, you crashing the car would," he said, looking to Carbon with an unreadable expression, his eyes probably far away as he spoke. "He only cares about you, right?" After all, what would it benefit the demon to get a bunch of random civilians killed? They were evil, sure, but this torture had a purpose, and that was for Carbon only. Well, James too, forced to watch as he was, but mainly Carbon.

ooc;; i am,,, back <3

and i return with a concerned james

oh god, 3 jobs? make sure you get rest bby <33

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James was very glad that Carbon had insisted on taking the wheel for the remainder of the drive to the house. While he still didn't necessarily approve of the all-nighter his boyfriend had pulled to get them here so quickly, he understood the turmoil and the need for it. After all, he wanted to get this problem solved more than anything, too. But anyways, James could easily admit that attempting to drive here himself would have been the biggest pain in the ass, even if Carbon had been giving him explicit directions on where to go. Each road they'd turned on was short, intersected almost immediately by a few others, and they turned in what was a seemingly random direction each time. To be quite honest, James lost complete track of where they were after the fifth turn. Carbon seemed certain, though, and why wouldn't he? He'd probably been to this place thousands of times all those years ago.

Eventually, they ended up on a road that was significantly longer than all the previous ones. Lined with trees, there were no turns or exits - just a straight shot down an old, single lane road. James didn't miss the way that Carbon's grip on the steering wheel grew firmer, or the way that his expression hardened as they grew closer to their destination. He couldn't exactly fault the younger man. After all, going on a road trip to meet the friend you thought you'd killed, plus a murderous demon whispering in your ear about catching on fire? It was a lot. Neither of them spoke, but the music playing softly from the speakers kept them company until a house rose up in the distance before them.

It was. . . grand? James didn't exactly know how to describe it. For one thing, it was a lot larger than he'd expected it to be. Out here in the middle of nowhere, he'd thought it would be something smaller and more run down, but this place looked to actually be in amazing condition. He stepped out and shut the car door behind him before stepping up next to Carbon, who was loitering quite unconvincingly by the hood. Gently he took the keys from the younger man and slipped them into his pocket, only to have said hand snatched in one of his boyfriend's own. His grip was tight, but James couldn't say that he minded. He simply wrapped his fingers around Carbon's with an ease and familiarity that revealed nothing of how long they'd actually been dating, and allowed himself to be tugged along toward the front door of the house. The place looked rustic; all wooden with iron railings and even what looked to be a stone chimney at the very top. Still, James had a feeling that its outward appearance only disguised how modern it really was. The scanner that Carbon laid his free hand against certainly looked to be a level of tech that didn't fit the aesthetic of the house.

He was led inside by the younger man, who was still overwhelmingly silent. He seemed so uncomfortable and unsure - nervous, even, and James was filled with the urge to tug him close and comfort him. He might have, had he not heard the telltale sounds of another being moving around in what seemed to be the kitchen nearby. The sounds of silverware and dishes were clear. The younger man's back brushed against his chest as he stepped in front, their bodies close together and hands still intertwined. The person who peeked their head beyond the door, however, seemed to fall short of a threat. Riley was. . . well, he was just about the sort of person he'd expect Carbon to have known. Attractive, for one thing, although that was an objective statement. His heart, after all, belonged to his boyfriend, as sappy as that sounded. The silver tooth that shone whenever he smiled was intriguing; James would like to hear the story behind that one. It seemed that anyone who Carbon knew had an interesting story to tell, and Riley was most of all, coming back from the dead and all that.

James' eyebrows rose incredulously when Riley immediately began coming onto the younger man, although James couldn't exactly fault him. For one thing, Carbon was and had always been extremely attractive. For another, his exclusivity was a rather new phenomenon, and he couldn't expect this man to know anything about that, given that dropped dead from Carbon's life - quite literally - a long time ago. Still, he couldn't help the hot flash of possessiveness that boiled under his skin as he allowed the hand grasping his own the lift the appendages into view. A dark humor flashed in his eyes as Riley immediately began to backpedal. Well, at least he seemed respectful. Still, he couldn't help but to tilt his head forward to press a hot kiss against the back of Carbon's jawline before the man got the chance to step away. With his emotions under control, he let his boyfriend slip away to begin rummaging through the freezer. James, for his part, pulled out a seat at the table in the kitchen and sat down, stretching his legs out in front of him up onto another chair a little ways away. If they were going to have a difficult conversation - and James had a feeling it would be difficult - like this, then he was going to be fucking comfortable.

Carbon didn't take long to find the liquor, and looked James' way with questioning eyes, but he only waved his hand in a 'no' sort of motion. If he started drinking now, he might not stop, and he really didn't need a repeat of an few nights ago, or he'd turn into some sort of alcoholic again. "Nice to meet you," he hummed, speaking for the first time since they'd arrived. Riley seemed nice enough so far, so there was no reason to be rude like he tended to be whenever Dom or Issa were around. "We didn't want to waste time before getting here," he replied with a shrug before raising his arms up above his head in a stretch. He'd been crammed into his car all night, so it was nice to be able to occupy as much space as he wanted now. "And someone didn't want to stop at another hotel last night," he continued, glancing to the side at Carbon before returning his attention to Riley. His tone was lighthearted; a hopefully not too obvious attempt at lifting the heavy atmosphere that had settled in the kitchen around them. "But anyways, explain away. I didn't tag along just for fun, so I think you can say whatever you need to."

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James was. . . shocked into a torturous silence while he listened to Riley explain the details of what Carbon would need to do to end his curse. He'd accuse Riley of lying; of just trying to convince Carbon to die outright, but the thing was, he trusted his boyfriend. If he'd really killed the man himself, then him standing here now was proof that someone could come back from the dead. And, well, the circumstances weren't the same, but James had witnessed it himself. The afterlife was more flexible and filled with more loopholes than most people ever got the privilege - or not-privilege, really - of knowing. Fuck, even James himself was bound for a hell of torture as soon as he died, soulless as he was. He just happened to have more time to wait for it than Carbon did.

His legs had bent slightly while he'd sat and listened, so he flattened them out further when Carbon swung one leg over to straddle his lap. He wrapped one hand around the younger man's waist, while the other reached for the bourbon that he'd previously denied. This revelation was a bit more than he'd expected, and he'd expected a hell of a lot. He tipped the bottle back for a sip or two before placing it on the table next to them, his now free second hand moving to meet the other one and link together around his boyfriend's waist. "You're going to kill me, you know that, right? You keep stressing me out like this, I'm going to get a weak heart." His words were heavy, but he forced his tone to be light and joking. He didn't really want to break down into some sort of crying fit in front of Riley, after all. Besides, if Carbon needed to remain confident for this to work, then James would be confident with him. He needed to believe in the younger man.

Still, he couldn't stop himself from tilting his head up to press soft, comforting kisses against the man's neck and jaw. This plan, it went against everything that they - that James - had been fighting for for the past days, and even weeks. to submit to death, to actually kill himself, it was the opposite of what he'd wanted to happen. They'd come here looking for Riley to tell them a way that Carbon could live, and maybe he would in the end, but that didn't change the fact that he'd have to die first. Again. To undergo trials, well, James knew that they'd be no joke. Carbon might have had a demon taunting him in his head, but James had actually seen and spoken to one once to make his deal. They didn't fuck around. And with all the bad things that Carbon had apparently done, he had no doubt that they'd do everything they could to break him down - to keep him in Hell and never let him go. It was terrifying. Every fiber of his being was telling him to not let the man go through with this, but that just meant that he'd keep burning until he couldn't take it any more; a different kind of torture than would end in absolute death. As much as he hated it, this seemed like it would be their best option.

"I'm sure Riley and I will be just fine while you're gone, yeah?" he said, speaking more to his boyfriend, but allowing his gaze to flit over to the other man, even while his lips remained mostly occupied with Carbon's skin. He was loathe to let the younger man go, and planned on keeping him as close as possible for as long as he could. James knew that he was scared, and while he couldn't erase the fear entirely, he hoped that his proximity and the slight shift in conversation would help. "You did tell me that we'd get along, didn't you?" he hummed. And, really, Riley did seem like the person that James could get along with, even if it were only superficially. His personality seemed fine, even though the only glimpses that James had gotten of it had been during this awful conversation. And even if they didn't, well, James would do anything to stay close to Carbon and make sure that he came through the other side of this okay.

ooc;; lets hope you can keep this confidence bby
its gonna be hell
literally <33

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James didn't really want to let Carbon slip away off of his lap, but he knew, deep down, that this had to be done. The younger man seemed to have made up his mind, and James wasn't going to be the weak link holding him back from doing what he needed. He allowed his hands to slip free from his boyfriend's back, missing the weight almost immediately. "Wait!" he protested, as soon as Carbon asked after the gun, his voice mixing with Riley's who, he belatedly realized, had said the exact same thing. He subconsciously reached out an arm, as if to pull his boyfriend back, but he let it fall as the younger man pressed his finger against Riley's forehead. The logic was. . . not sound at all. He didn't need to repent for that, and even if he did, being set on fire was more than enough. If anyone needed to repent in this situation, it was James, who was at fault for all of this. If he hadn't tried to bring Carbon back, they wouldn't be here right now.

The worst part of all, though, the thought that dug deep into James' skull and wouldn't let him go was that he wouldn't only have to live with the fact that Carbon had killed himself. He'd have to hear it - to know the exact moment that it happened. The exact moment that he pulled the trigger and sent a bullet straight into his head. It was. . . torturous. He was still and nearly wide-eyes as Carbon walked back over, leaning forward to press a kiss on his head, but that wasn't enough. If James was going to have to live with the fact that this might possibly be the last time he ever spoke to his boyfriend, then it wouldn't be nearly enough. With a sudden surge of determination, he yanked Carbon down by the front of his shirt and pressed their lips together in a way too forceful kiss. He couldn't let it last long, though, because the more time he spent with his hands on the younger man, the less capable he would be of letting him go. "Don't make me wait too long, baby" he whispered, finally dropping his hand and leaning away. He'd believe that Carbon would make it through this and come back. He had to.

His gaze never left the stairs where the younger man had disappeared. His hands were clenched into fists on his lap and he sat there, waiting. Riley was quiet too, although James wasn't looking at him, so he couldn't say anything as to what he was doing. His eyes barely even blinked, and he almost didn't flinch when the sound of a gun went off above them, followed by the light thud of something hitting the floor. He finally blinked and looked away, casting his eyes toward the table before him. His eyes felt damp, but if Riley knew what was good for him, then he wouldn't say a damn thing. His hand shook a bit as he reached for the neck of the bottle of bourbon, but that was the least of his worries as he tilted it back for a long drink. Maybe he would just become an alcoholic after all.

I'll take good care of your boyfriend. And don't forget, I'll be seeing you soon enough, too. . .

It was a testament to his state of mind that James didn't even flinch at the familiar voice in his head. Fuck that demon. James would say he could go to hell if the damned thing weren't there already but, hey, that was just the folly of human expression, wasn't it? "What a bastard, making me listen to that. I'll kick his ass when he comes back," James muttered, shaking his head. If he could be angry, then he wouldn't cry, right? And he most definitely wasn't going to cry and be sad. Carbon was strong. He'd come back, so there was no reason to be sad. Not now. "Just because he likes to get his hands bloody doesn't mean I need to hear it," he continued with a huff, finally slamming the bottle down and looking toward Riley. "So you forgive him for all that?" he asked, gesturing to his own forehead. "He was so scared you'd hate him, y'know." If he was going to be here with Riley, they might as well get comfy and make conversation, right? Either way, it was a distraction to get out of his own head for a while.

ooc;; poor boys, the trauma is real rn
james is gonna be so tortured <3
let him have so peace w/ riley beforehand lmaoo

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James kept his eyes on Riley and just. . . listened as the man talked. He rambled, but it was a reminder of Carbon, who did the exact same thing and could fill a silence with conversation about nearly anything. Riley wasn't Carbon, but James could tell that he was kind, and his words were calming enough; a distraction from the deafening sound of a gun, which was still ringing in his ears. He chuckled slightly at the idea of a little, baby Carbon starting a fight with a potential adopter. It seemed as if some things really did never change. He couldn't even begin to count the number of times he'd seen the man round on someone and cut them with harsh words, even back when they were in high school. Few people made it past the scathing tongue and threatening demeanor, but those who did were lucky. Lucky to know Carbon - the best person James had ever gotten the privilege of meeting. "You can cook if you want, I'll help if you need it" he hummed, bringing the bottle of bourbon closer, but never bringing it up to his lips. Instead, he just fiddled with the label on the side.

"Most of the stuff I know about Carbon is from association, y'know," he said after a moment, finding himself invested in the conversation and the chance he'd been given to learn about his boyfriend's childhood; the parts he never heard about. "He came into my class in high school and the teacher made us sit next to each other and do a project together," he said with a small smile, glancing up briefly at Riley before looking back to the bottle in his hands. "He intimidated me at first. Way too loud and confident. And pushy. Hell, the first thing he ever did was hit on me." If James were still the same bashful, quiet kid from high school, it might embarrass him to think about to this day. But as it was, and considering the fact that he was dating Carbon now, the memory was just funny. "People told me that I should stay away from him, too. That he was trouble. But why would I do that? Its not my fault that people can't fathom how to not treat someone like shit," he huffed.

After all, the people who actually deserved Carbon's kindness - who treated him like a person worthy of kindness himself - like Jesse and Jacob proved their own worth plenty of times. In James' personal experience, it was only assholes who ever thought that Carbon wasn't worth the time, and their opinion never meant much to him. He looked up to the ceiling for a moment, but had to force himself to drop his head again because of what he knew was up there. "I'm glad we became friends, but he certainly never told me many things himself. Not that I blame him, I guess. If I'd gone through all that shit I'd want some portion of my life to stay away from it, too. To stay safe." It was part of the reason they were in this mess, but James purposefully didn't mention that. He was a bit afraid that Riley already knew, anyways.

"I'm glad he stopped with the sex thing, though. He'd bring home some random guy every night, drunk or stoned or both. Any jealousy be damned, it was still terrible to see. Especially after the nights that Issa called him up to some party somewhere," he said, forcing out a bitter chuckle at the memories. Those nights had always hurt the worst, only second to whenever Dom called, causing Carbon to return all beaten and bloody. "I certainly don't ever feel like I'm good enough for him but hell, as long as he'll let me be around, I will be." James had no plans on ever abandoning his boyfriend, especially now, after all of this shit they were going through. It did feel a bit weird, saying all of this out loud to a stranger, but what wasn't weird about the current situation?

"Do you really think it will take weeks, though?" he asked, unable to stop his mind from wandering back.

ooc;; i love riley
what a sweetheart <3

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

Honestly, James didn't feel very hungry, but thinking logically, he knew he would have to eat something. He hadn't since last night before he'd fallen asleep, so his stomach should be begging for something right now, and the alcohol he'd downed certainly wouldn't be doing anything to satisfy it. Biting back a sigh, he reached forward and grabbed for one of the cookies. Something sweet? He could force himself to eat that, at least. "Seeing happy couples still makes Carbon gag, but I'm glad he tolerates me enough for us to be one," he said with a small smile, nibbling at the edge of the cookie he'd taken. It was nice to hear Riley's assurance, though, even if it was also a bit funny. They didn't know each other, so the word felt a bit superficial. Still, he was a nice guy and James would take the compliment that he'd obviously been given.

"But hey, I can't blame you for being unable to go through with that. Hell, I know Carbon doesn't either," he said with a shrug, finally sinking his teeth further into the sweet in his hand to take an actual bite. "He's just a lot tougher than anyone I've ever met. It's not really fair that he has to be, but life's just shit like that sometimes." If anything, Carbon's strength has kept the younger man around, and as selfish as it was, James was glad for it. He certainly wasn't as tough as his boyfriend was, and even though all the shit he'd had to go through his whole life was bullshit and unfair, James was proud that he was still here. He was proud of his best friend for. . . living through it. He deserved all the happiness in the world because of it.

When Riley answered his question it was. . . fuck, it wasn't really the answer he wanted to hear. To still catch on fire, even after going through this trial shit, what sort of fate was that? An anger flared in his gut, and while on the surface it was directed at the demon who was doing all this, deep inside he was really angry at himself. Stewing in his emotions, James reached for another cookies almost mindlessly, barely even registering that he'd finished the first one. Riley pointed, directing him to the bedroom that would be James', and he nodded, finally pushing back against the chair to stand. "I'll be fine," he said with a short nod. "Thank you," he added, before turning and disappearing down the hall. He found the bedroom easily, and fuck, it was large. The bed was made, sheets and comforter pulled up to the pillows in perfection. Not a thing seemed to be out of place. James appreciated the hospitality, although he found that he couldn't focus on it for long. He'd told Riley that he'd be fine, and he would be. Eventually. But finally being alone after everything sent his thoughts spiraling, and as he collapsed onto the edge of the bed, the only thing he could hear was the shot of Carbon's gun.

But he was fine. For days, he was fine. Riley was a good person to have around. He was easy to talk to and had the same rambling habit as Carbon, which filled the silence when James couldn't bring himself to talk much, which tended to happen, even on normal days. Their conversations were easy, though. Carbon had been right; they did get along well. And James refused to be a mopey guest who fell into a depressive spiral, never leaving his room. He didn't want to go through with that, and he knew that Carbon would be unhappy to hear it whenever he came back. So, he and Riley kept each other company and got to know each other, mainly by swapping stories about the man they were waiting on. They were obviously both struggling their way through this situation - feeling Carbon's absence deeply - so why bother with having to suffer alone?

ooc;; "my boyfriend may be dead, but at least i got this sweet bedroom!"

ok, i timeskipped a bit and left it a little open ended, so you can start up again whenever/with whoever you want <33

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

Maybe it was to be expected, but James' sleeping schedule went to shit from the first night in this house. He'd always been a light sleeper, but he'd also been someone who passed out pretty quickly. That ability seemed to have flown out the window as soon as Carbon killed himself, though, because now he couldn't drift off without at least an hour of tossing and turning. Or just saying 'fuck it' and getting wasted until the alcohol finally knocked him out. Riley might not like to drink himself, but he made for good company on the nights that he was awake as well. He tolerated a drunken, chaotic James pretty well but hey, the man had been friends - was still friends - with Carbon, so what couldn't he handle? With that being said, he couldn't deny that on most nights, he didn't fall asleep until well into the morning hours. It was a damn good thing he wasn't expected to be anywhere, after all. In fact, the only time he'd even left the house was to go to his car and drag inside both his own and his boyfriend's suitcases. Carbon would surely want his stuff whenever he came back, and it didn't need to be left out in the trunk the whole time.

Tonight he'd finally fallen asleep sometime around three in the morning, and that was without the help of alcohol, which was very nice. He wouldn't wake up with a hangover in the morning. Unfortunately, though, he did dream of Carbon, which meant that he'd be longing for the man's return even more once he woke up. In his dream, the younger man was straddling his thighs, laving his face with sweet kisses. It was incredibly hot, and even his sleep addled brain made note of the fact that he was definitely feeling a bit touch starved. Even before they'd been dating, Carbon and James had been tactile with one another. He'd heard that Riley was too, and had seen it briefly when he'd interacted with the younger man, but he and James weren't really that close to one another yet. They were probably friends by now - James would consider them so - but there was still an awkwardness to their interactions that probably stemmed from the fact that the closest person to each of them was dead upstairs.

The light sleeper that he was, James slowly rose to wakefulness, lamenting the loss of his pleasant dream until he realized, slowly, that he was still feeling the sensation of lips against his skin. Startled, he shifted upwards, nearly dislodging the man on his lap until he reached out automatically to hold him in place. James was. . . awed. It was Carbon, right there in front of him. On top of him. "Holy shit, baby," he whispered, his eyes roving over his boyfriend. He looked, well, he looked good. He certainly didn't look like someone who had shot themselves in the head, which was great. There was a weariness to the way he held himself, and to the look in his eyes, but what could really be expected? James couldn't even begin to guess what he'd gone through, but he could fathom that it was a complete and total hell. There was also the fact that Carbon was quite obviously completely smashed but, well, James had spent a good portion of his time here just the same, and he hadn't even been the one who died.

Tentatively, as if he were scared that even touching the man would make him disappear, James reached both his hands up to cup around Carbon's face. "Hi," he said, pulling him in gently for a proper kiss. It was soft and sweet and slow, filled with emotion that James couldn't bring himself to voice right now. "You want me to shower with you?" he asked, finally pulling away. He expected as much, considering that the younger man woke him up to tell him so, rather than just doing it, but he couldn't help but to ask anyway. Honestly, he was in a state of disbelief right now. He couldn't quite convince himself that this wasn't some sort of extremely lucid dream, even though he'd never had such a dream before. Still, it felt too good to be true, and he was so happy that he could cry. He wouldn't though; there were better things to do, and he'd cried enough.

ooc;; welcome back, bby! <3

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

There was no way in hell - ha, funny - that James would let Carbon escape from his sight now. He kicked the bed covers off, following after the younger man and into the bathroom eagerly. He watched as he dropped his clothes, leaning against the door frame and squinting against the light that was assaulting their eyes. For James' part, he only had on the shirt and boxers that he'd worn to fall into bed, so he had a bit of a head start on the younger man. He'd also taken a shower already that day but, hey, who was he to deny to opportunity to press his body up against Carbon's after all this time without him? James was no sex fiend, but his boyfriend's absence had certainly been having an effect on him in unexpected ways. Just having him settled onto his hips seemed to be enough to set him off, but they deserved the opportunity to have a little fun, didn't they? Carbon especially. He could have whatever he wanted from James. Although, that was pretty much always the case anyway.

He watched as the younger man began working at the knots on his boots, and couldn't help but to chuckle when he whined, begging James to help him get the shoes off. Feigning a sigh, he knelt down in front of the man and deftly undid the ties himself before tugging the shoes down and off Carbon's feet, one after the other. With that taken care of, James rose back to his feet. "No faith, baby," he teased, bringing his hands down to the hem of his shirt and tugging it up over his head, the neckline rustling his hair even more than his short bout of sleep had. "Of course I'll fuck you the way you need," he continued, dropping his shirt to the floor and sliding up to press his chest against Carbon's. The man smelled dusty and dirty if James allowed himself to think about it, but the scent was really the last thing on his mind at the moment. It certainly didn't matter, now that his boyfriend was alive and back in his arms.

Despite his promise, he tilted his head forward and continued to leave slow and sweet kisses over Carbon's face. His breath smelled of whiskey and there was a thin layer of grime on his skin that felt unpleasant against James' lips, but he didn't really care. Couldn't bring himself to care, especially since they'd be getting in the shower as soon as James could convince himself to move away from the younger man once again. He allowed himself a few more minutes of selfishness - of being close just because he could - before he pulled back and moved to the shower. He twisted the knob, but didn't put it as hot as he would for himself. Instead, he set it to a temperature that was better favored by Carbon.

"Get in," he hummed, reaching for Carbon's hand to lightly tug the man closer. The sooner that his boyfriend washed off the layer of dust he'd been covered in, then the sooner James could roam his lips freely over his body in a way that would be more pleasurable for the both of them. His hands found their way to Carbon's waist where he began tugging at the band of the younger man's pants to pull them down. James was overwhelmed with the urge to see his boyfriend naked, to roam his hands all over and touch absolutely every single inch of skin. "Fuck, I love you," he murmured, pressing his lips to Carbon's neck. "Even though you smell. Please get in the shower, baby."

ooc;; this is verging on risque but it's fine lmao <3

we love these boys!

and they love each other <3

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James was. . . ecstatic, to say the least. The fact that Carbon was back once more hadn't even properly set in yet, he didn't think. A part of him was afraid that it wouldn't ever, at this point. He'd already struggled a bit with the fact that the man was alive once more after their house burnt down the first time, so to be faced with the loss and then subsequent return of him for a second time, it was. . . mind numbing. Honestly, James knew he was lucky. Other people never got the luxury to get their best friend back after dying at all. Of course, an argument could be made that it wasn't exactly luck which had saved the man, but, well, the state of James' soul was a problem for another day. He was purposefully ignoring it as much as possible, and neither Riley or Carbon had specifically brought it up, so he didn't either. They all had enough on their plate to deal with, after all.

His phone was resting lazily in one hand as he scoured through the drawers in the bedroom for a shirt with the other. He'd been falling behind on laundry the past few days. It wasn't liked he'd brought much of his wardrobe along, after all; just what he'd been able to throw into the suitcase before they'd left, so he ran out of clean clothes much faster than he ever would have back at home. He finally found one, tossing the electronic device onto the bed before tugging the fabric over his head. There was a pleasant soreness on his arms as he moved, evident by the black/purple/blue markings blooming on his biceps. Carbon had certainly done a number on him, which was unfamiliar and new. James liked it. Smiling lightly to himself for a moment, he bent down to scoop the phone back up, unsurprising to feel it buzz in his hand.

'You're an idiot, yeah? How long are you going to avoid this?' the text read, and James couldn't help but to roll his eyes. Liam still insisted on texting him every so often about Charles' bitching and whining after he'd blocked the man. He would have to tell Carbon about it, but he hadn't had the chance when they first got here over two weeks ago, and the opportunity hadn't presented itself since his boyfriend had come back to life, either. They'd both been. . . otherwise occupied. 'I don't know what you're expecting me to do. I'm not going to answer him, Li,' he fired back in irritation before shoving his phone deep into his back pocket, intent on ignoring the damn thing. The only two people he even needed to talk to right now currently lived in this house, and if he spent any more energy or thought on Charles, he was really going to end up souring his mood. He'd told Liam all this shit already!

He meandered his way into the kitchen, searching for Carbon, and was halfway surprised to find him eating one of the brownies the Riley had left sitting on the counter. He was about to open his mouth to say something about the man eating something that was sweet for once, but snapped his jaw shut when Carbon beat him to it. He couldn't really say that he was surprised about what the younger man was planning on doing. Why wouldn't he want to murder the person who had absolutely ruined his life, as well as the life of all the people he had ever been close to? James couldn't fault him for it, even if, in his own mind, he still couldn't exactly picture Carbon as a murderer. He'd seen his boyfriend throw the knife, and had heard plenty - especially from Riley - so of course he believed it, but the two images didn't quite match up in his mind. In a way, he didn't want them to. Of course, that wasn't very realistic, either.

He chuckled lightly and rounded the counter to stand close to Carbon, wrapping his arms around the man's waist where he sat on the stool. "Those brownies are delicious, asshole," he hummed, pressing a chaste kiss against his boyfriend's cheek. "I'm not going to stop you, or say anything," he finally continued, after a few seconds of silence had fallen between them. "I don't really want to go back there, either, but I'm not going to let you go alone. You know that," he hummed, letting one arm slip free to grab a brownie of his own. Carbon didn't have to enjoy them, but he and Riley certainly would.

"Besides, apparently Dom's not the only one who's been poking around," he sighed, digging his other hand into his pocket to slip the phone onto the counter. It was locked, but as to be expected, there was an unread notification alert on the lockscreen. It was from Liam, who James had finally registered in his phone, if only to keep getting updates about Charles' erratic behaviors lately. Of course, Carbon probably wouldn't recognize the name, but that was to be expected. He'd tried his best to keep his best friend away from that whole part of his life, much like the younger man did with Dom and everyone else. "Charles broke in a few nights ago. Looking for me. That's one of his friends," he explained, pointing at the name on the screen, right before it faded to black. "Because all we need is more excitement, right?" he asked, looking up to meet his boyfriend's eyes.

ooc; murder quest, murder quest!

& more dangerous acquaintances!
I am here for it, bby! <3

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James rolled his eyes at the man's pout, pressing his hand lightly to the man's forehead in order to push him away again, teasing with playful touches and physical banter. Honestly, it reminded him the most of when they'd been kids. James still did all of that now - nothing would break that habit, most likely - but it had started up when he and Carbon first got comfortable around one another. Or, better put; when James finally got completely comfortable around the other man. It was the first sign of a lasting friendship, and it had been a good one. He picked up the reminder of the brownie, biting off a large chunk of the sweet as prompted. Riley really was awesome at baking. He and James had actually spent a decent chunk of their time waiting for Carbon to return holed up in the kitchen. They were, after all, very similar in many things, and their mutual love of sweet foods was one of those things.

He turned to look when the door opened behind them, allowing the aforementioned man entrance into the kitchen, his arms laden with multiple shopping bags. He huffed out a curt laugh at Riley's comment regarding the atmosphere. Was it really that heavy? He supposed that Dominic and any mention - or even thought - of the bastard had a way of doing it. James was already feeling worried and apprehensive, although he always was, whenever it came to Carbon. He'd spent too many nights staying up and wasting away while he waited for the younger man to return, and that definitely wouldn't change, even if he was now privy to just how competent his boyfriend was. If anything, that only increased his anxiety, but he tried to push it out of his mind. It was probably just a 'that's my boyfriend and I love him' thing anyway, right? Besides, it wasn't as if worrying would serve any benefit, so it was better to just push those thoughts away completely.

"You should send it to me," he hummed, finishing off the brownie. "And everything else, because I know you have more," he responded with a grin, wiping his fingers off on a nearby napkin while Carbon tore open a bag of candies. It didn't take more than a second look for James to realize what they were. As much as his boyfriend hated the taste of sweet things, that didn't stop him from eating sugar disguised as something sour. James, for one, preferred to taste just how much sugar he was ingesting. He didn't comment this time, though - although he'd been known to in the past - and instead leaned forward, resting his elbows on the counter where he stood next to Carbon. His phone was still in front of him where he'd left it, and he toyed with the device with one hand, pushing on one side to send it spinning lightly.

James liked to think he was decently smart, but even so, it didn't take much to figure out what his boyfriend was referring to when he spoke to Riley. In fact, the older man might have, at some point over the past two weeks, mentioned something about a stash of tools, weapons, and assortment of other 'toys' that had come into Carbon's possession over the years. He hadn't seen it himself, but he had seen the results of their use through pictures that Riley had shown him on the occasion that he'd felt brave enough to ask. It had been. . . a lot. Dark, bloody, gruesome. Yeah, it wasn't hard to figure how Carbon had killed so many people.

He looked up, shrugging one shoulder and pressing away from the counter, back into a full standing position, before finally shoving his phone back in his pocket once more. He still hadn't read Liam's last message, but that wasn't exactly important. In the grand scheme of things, did it really matter what the man had to say? It wouldn't change anything, in the end. "I'll come," he said simply. Was he becoming desensitized to the whole 'murderer' thing? Maybe. He supposed that was what happened when he was dating and associating with an assassin and ex-gang member, wasn't it? But honestly, the last thing James wanted to do was run away now. He'd told Carbon he'd stick with him, and he'd meant it with his whole heart. "I still want somewhere in the middle of nowhere," he laughed, recalling his previous comment that had come out in a fit of anger at their whole situation.

ooc; dun dun dun!

owo, whats this ??

*gasps* hell yes, i am here for it!!
if (when) james gets kidnapped,, im gonna torture my boy <3

J A M E S ♛ L I L L D O N

MY FEARS, WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE

James chuckled, shaking his head good-naturedly. "You've already been to the grave once, Riley. I'll get that recipe," he joked once Carbon took his - extremely exaggerated - leave out the sliding glass door. He waved one hand in a lax goodbye over his head as he turned to follow his boyfriend, stepping out in the backyard and sliding the door shut behind him with a quiet, yet still audible clatter as the frames connected. He kept step next to his boyfriend, allowing the younger man to lead the way through the yard and to the shed, although, James would hesitate to coin it a shed. It looked more like a miniature log cabin, all pristine wood and smooth edges; nothing like the connotations that the word shack brought about. Carbon approached the pad that kept the door locked, but James just leaned against the wood wall while he waited, the soft tapping and beeping of the input code loud between them.

"That's the longest fucking code," he scoffed quietly, unable to resist the urge to tease his boyfriend, attempting to crack some of the tension that had built up around them. It was obvious that Carbon was feeling either uncomfortable, nervous, or both about opening this shed and showing off the contents, and as for James, he couldn't even say what he was feeling. Surprisingly, if he thought about it, he wasn't actually feeling much of anything. There was a peculiar numbness that had seeped into his bones the past few weeks, especially when it came to murder and anything that Carbon might have done in the past. Was this numbness a bad thing? James didn't exactly possess the insight to know, and he didn't feel like deep diving into the fucking mess that was his head and emotions to try and find out. No, he'd take numbness any day.

His head was tilted back, glancing up at the sky as he waited, Carbon's words finally drawing his attention back to the now unlocked door before them. He could. . . understand the sentiment. He knew that the younger man wished nothing more than for there to be a divide, something of dissent between his life with James and everything else. The corners of his mouth tipped up into a gentle, supportive smile, and he dutifully followed behind Carbon into the shed.

He'd expected a lot, but nothing could fully prepare him for the sight of just how much there was in here. The layout, with everything displayed as such, it almost looked like the lairs of a psychopath; their torture and murder weapons on display, striking a deep set fear into anyone who happened to catch a glimpse. Was he dating a psychopath? The thought was funny but, huh, maybe. At the very least, James wasn't being struck down by fear. Mostly he was. . . amazed. That was probably the right word. His feelings were complicated, but it was astounding to see the full mass of Carbon's dangerous little collection. He was absorbed in looking over a shelf of interesting looking substances and chemicals - a variety of which he didn't even recognize by name - when the jangling sound of keys brought his attention back to Carbon.

James reached his hand out to accept the bat, unsurprised to feel how much heavier it was compared to the average baseball bat. Not only was it thicker, but the pure metal added a hefty weight to it that made it interesting to hold. He listened to Carbon describe how he'd made it, and couldn't stop the smile that crept onto his face. His boyfriend had always been good at working with his hands. "You did a good job," he murmured, and he meant it. The metal was smooth and the spikes were even; a work of perfection, at least to James' untrained eye. He brought the bat up closer, rubbing a finger lightly over one of the spikes as he waited for Carbon to finish grabbing whatever it was that he wanted. Holding a weapon like this - one that he knew had been used to kill countless numbers of people - made him feel odd in an indescribable way. Afraid wasn't right, nor was uncomfortable. Maybe out of place? He wasn't the type of person to ever handle weapons before, so even something as normal as a bat - modified as this one may be - felt strange in his own hands.

Once his boyfriend finished up, he followed after the younger man back out of the shed and into the yard, the bat hanging at his side as they walked out. As Carbon spoke, he stopped walking, turning to the side to study his lover's face with interest, attempting to parse what he was thinking from his expression. He suspected that the younger man was feeling weary about what James' own reaction would be, although he couldn't say for certain. It was, at least, what he would be worrying about were the situation reversed. "What? Like I'm scared of your spiky bat?" he hummed, raising an eyebrow. He let his hand slip on the handle a bit, just enough for his grip to settle on the very edge, before he twisted his hand and wrist to twirl the weapon a bit. It was certainly a bigger strain on his muscles, considering how heavy it was, but he managed just fine. Instead of handing it over, he reached out with his free hand to pull Carbon close, pressing a gentle kiss to the corner of the man's mouth. "Just over two weeks," he answered quietly, before stepping away once more. A decade. . . ? James couldn't even begin to imagine. It hurt - ached - to even think about.

ooc;; ooh,

no need to worry!

james will be in so much pain,

he'll ABSOLUTELY wish he were dead! <33