Posts by Ryan B.

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  • All I'm saying is if you don't love me no more [p w/Ryan] lie

    It could never be one, decisive thing, could it? Nothing could. It was all messy and complicated and conflicting. He wished that he could just be all the things that Lucy wanted, but even if he was it would still be messy. She liked his dark side, if not his abusive side. She wasn't drawn to him because he was a nice guy, living in a nice house, living a nice life. She'd been drawn to the darkness in him, and in some way, he'd been drawn towards the light in her.

    He didn't see that light anymore, not after her son's disappearance. He certainly didn't see it now.

    Ryan stared at her, trying to figure out what game she was playing (and there was always a game with her), but he couldn't figure it out. Why come here and ask about food if she wasn't hungry? Why come here at all? "What are you doing here, then?" His voice was somehow rough and soft at the same time.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • All I'm saying is if you don't love me no more [p w/Ryan] lie

    Ryan knew precisely the kind of people Sel liked to hook up with, and it was knowledge that was both good to have but very strange to possess. He could easily spot potential rivals, but knowing that he fit into her type so snugly and understanding that type so thoroughly, it was just a weird thing for him.

    Lucy had a light, back when she called herself that. She had shone too brightly to fit in with him and the dingy bars and nightclubs they frequented. And there'd been something in this new version of her too, but different. Maybe it was apt to say that Lucy had a light and Sel only had a spark. In any case, there was only darkness in her eyes.

    She looked away, and he found himself stepping forward, hand reaching for her but stopping shy. "Sel..." He didn't know why he said it. Why he called her that instead of Lucy. It kind of just slipped out, but it felt right. She wasn't the same person that she used to be, she was someone else entirely. It was time to acknowledge that.

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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • LET'S COME OUT OF THE WOODWORKS [open, human au]

    "Isn't it?" He said to Lucy, a shit-eating grin on his face. He was deeply amused by her going to hide behind Calla, especially since he hadn't even turned the water on. He forced it remain even as the latter leaned back into the former. "I've got a sponge." He jerked his head towards the bucket sitting a few feet behind him.

    //anyone want their char to get wet? hehe
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • BREAKFAST IS COLD [MEETING]

    He was late yet again, but managed not to miss any of her announcements. "Noted." Ryan said as Lucy concluded the meeting.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • All I'm saying is if you don't love me no more [p w/Ryan] lie

    When he'd realized who he was, all he wanted was to have Lucy by his side once more. And when he found out that she was out there, there hadn't been any doubt in his mind that could find her and win her back, not even when she'd changed and didn't seem to want him. He'd known that he could win her back, given enough time and space.

    So in Ryan's eyes, this was inevitable. But it still surprised him when she kissed him, her arms wrapping around his neck in such a startlingly familiar way. He didn't hesitate, kissing her back and wrapping his own arms around her waist.

    She was his again. He'd gotten what he wanted. Wasn't it supposed to be a letdown when you won? Wasn't it supposed to be empty when you got everything you wanted? Or was it supposed to feel wrong, off? He could faintly taste whiskey on her lips, but it was faint enough that he guessed it was from a few hours ago, or only the smallest amount. So really, it didn't feel any of those things. It felt right, it felt like home.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • I ALWAYS MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES [open, morning sickness]

    After Lucy kissed him, after she pulled him back to his bedroom, he'd thought something had changed between them, that she'd finally come back to him. The morning had been crushing. She wanted things to go back to the way they'd been before she came to him, as if somehow that was possible. It wasn't.

    But he'd gone along with it.

    Now she was crouched by the railing, the smell of puke mixing with the salty sea air. A concerned look appeared on his face - was she sick? He didn't know enough about pregnancy and how it affected Sel to realize what all this meant.

    //surprisingly low muse rn

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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • I ALWAYS MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES [open, morning sickness]

    Ah, so Lucy had finally told Calla about him. He wondered how much of the story she'd given, if it was just their life together before, just what they'd done a few weeks earlier, or if it was both. Based on the malice, he was guessing Sel hadn't left out the "abusive" label that came before "ex".

    But Lucy wasn't blameless in what had happened. It had been her idea and... Christ, he'd never force himself on her, as fucked up as he was and as fucked up as the things he had done to her were. Ryan would never do that to her - to anyone.

    "No." He said evenly, glaring at Calla. He'd stared down scarier, bigger people than the blind feline before him, he wasn't about to be intimidated or give up his ground.

    Something was off. Calla knew something he didn't, Ryan realized. His gaze snapped towards the siamese feline, Calla and Xylia forgotten. "What are you talking about?" He asked, frowning. "What are you talking about?"
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • CAN YOU SEE THE MONSTER [MEETING]

    He was pretty late, but it seemed Lucy hadn't really gotten into the meeting yet. It also seemed Xylia was the only other one present.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • GRILLED CHEESE [open, barbecue with DarkClan]

    "Shy" and "timid" were not usually words that were used to describe Ryan, but when he spent most of his time away from the group, he supposed he could see how someone that didn't know him yet might think that. "Please, don't insult me." He muttered - as if he'd turn out anything like charcoal - he took pride in his food, he wasn't about to half-ass it. "I got it." Ryan wasn't exactly the type to accept help, even with something like this.

    His chest swelled a little when Lucy/Sel complimented his cooking, but he kept his focus on making the food. At Riju's question, he perked up. "Some food is, like these burgers, but other food isn't. Like ice cream." He wrinkled his nose, remembering one of his friends from his old life that would put his ice cream in the microwave to melt it. At Riju's and Serafin's praise, he grinned. "Thanks, glad you like it."
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • All I'm saying is if you don't love me no more [p w/Ryan] lie

    Unfortunately for Sel, when she moved she did wake him. His eyes drifted open lazily, and a slow smile spread across his lips as he saw her. "Morning, Sel." He said, yawning. Ryan moved the arm that had previously been around her waist up, pressing his wrist to his forehead.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • I ALWAYS MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES [open, morning sickness]

    There was a million reasons why he didn't want kids. Number one: he didn't like them. They were loud and smelled and were a drain on resources. Number two: he... couldn't be a father. It wasn't like he physically was incapable of it or anything (obviously), but he didn't... know how to be one. His father had been an drunk that was MIA half the time and any other male role models that Ryan might have had were just as distant.

    They'd ruin his life, but not as badly as he'd ruin theirs. Regardless of whether he wanted to or not.

    The words didn't seem real. It was like something out of his imagination, but surely Lucy would never be saying those things to him in real life, right? Realization came in waves. That Lucy really was saying it. That she really was pregnant. That she was saying those things to him, and Calla was looking at him like, well... Fuck. The kits were his.

    The kits were his.

    He was going to be a father.

    For the longest time, he just stared at them, dumbfounded. "W-what?" Lucy was pregnant with his children. Ok. He understood what each of those words meant, what they meant when they were strung together like that, and that they were true. But it still didn't make sense. "Y-you're keeping them?" It wasn't really a question. He knew what the answer was, but he couldn't help but hope that the Captain would surprise him.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOU BABY [MEETING]

    Ryan was horribly late to the meeting, but he showed up nonetheless. "Noted." He muttered.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • All I'm saying is if you don't love me no more [p w/Ryan] lie

    And just like that, his heaven was shattered. He might barely be awake, but he knew well enough that her tone and words indicated that this wasn't going to be the new normal. But he couldn't accept that. "Why not? It's a nice name." Not to mention one she'd been trying to get him to use for ages now. Did the sudden shift confuse him? Yes. Very much so.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • As We Wait, In The Night | Open, Stargazing

    Ryan was... rather out of the loop, particularly when it came to activities his Clanmates seemed to enjoy doing, unless their name rhymed with "fell". "What... is all this?" He asked, a confused frown on his face as he padded towards Xylia.

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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • You'll Be Fine || o-invite

    Ryan knew he needed to get out more, not just within the Clan but with their allies too. Well, Serafin was presenting the perfect opportunity and the folks over in DarkClan were pretty chill. Plus, hey, capture the flag, that's something he could get into. "I'll come too."

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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • CLIMBING TO HEAVEN || O- Capture the flag

    Yikes, Ryan had been expecting a bigger turnout for this, more than just the people he'd seen discussing the event in the Skulls - Serafin, who invited them, and Xylia, who accepted. "Hey." He greeted, sitting down near the First Mate.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • ya salty ya got a micro d // a grand old Egyptian themed party

    Ryan was a bit late to the party, but whatever. Lucy's news about being pregnant was... A lot to digest for the male, who'd very vehemently never wanted kids. But shit. He was gonna be a father. But taking a timeout to sort out his feelings on that was why he needed to get back into it - and what better place to start than this bumpin' party?

    It wasn't really surprising to see the Captain talking to the host and someone else - out of everyone in the Skulls, she was easily the most social. However, his neutral expression darkened as he approached and heard what they were talking about, and his possessiveness came out again. "No fucking way." Lucy might have been... free with her sexuality, but at least she'd stuck with one person at a time. God damn.
    Lucy = Sel's past life

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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • A BROKEN MAN [open] DOING THE BEST HE CAN

    He still couldn't make sense of it. Of Lucy being pregnant. Of the kits being his. Of his impending fatherhood. God, he couldn't be a father. He shouldn't be. Anyone that had spent five minutes with him could tell you that Ryan was not parent-material. But in nine - no, they were cats now, it'd be far less than that - months Lucy would give birth. It wasn't enough time to prepare. But... he was still gonna try,

    "Hey guys?" He called out tentatively, standing in the shadow of the tavern, his goroo beside him. It still needed a name, but that was the last thing on Ryan's mind right now.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • As We Wait, In The Night | Open, Stargazing

    Huh, it sure sounded like a peaceful, pleasant way to spend the evening. Almost too nice. Things were always... tense, at least he was pretty sure they were. It was rare for Ryan to find a scene that was actually chill, and honestly he was all too happy to have one nice evening for once. "Not really. The stars are hard to see in the city... I've done it a couple times, though." Usually looking at the sky wasn't the first idea that came to mind when he tried to decide what to do at night, though.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18

  • CAUSE I'M HEAVEN IN HIDING [MEETING]

    Ryan shuffled in a little late, taking a seat near Eulalie, waiting for Lucy to get into it.
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    Tags | Updated 6/18