Posts by littlesoldier g. d.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — tw for first paragraph

One of the most painful experiences in her lifetime had been giving birth. Not only had it pained her physically but very much emotionally too. She had been so inexplicably afraid of what was to come, so judged. She felt like she wanted to hold onto someones paw and cry all the tears she fucking could. The kids had come and they had been beautiful. One had died in the womb. It was a burnt corpse when it arrived, dead because of the high heat in her womb whenever she burst into flames. The other kids had scabs layering their little bodies but thank god they had survived. She'd mourned the loss of the sixth child and took care of the ones snuggling by her belly. Another painful experience in her lifetime had been the loss of her leg. It was quite the trigger for her nowadays. Whenever she saw lions (more specifically female lions), she went back to that day that Dystopia escaped from her rusted chains and ripped off her back leg. She would look down and see this.. lion munching on her. How had she survived that day? The pain had been so terrible. She had been so shocked at first though that she didn't feel it. But when it kicked in, she wanted to go back to not feeling it at all.

Littlestar knew a pregnant female when she saw one and the cougar was. Her belly was quite swollen, but not near to the point of having birth any time soon. So when she saw the wildcat flop down to a sitting position, eyes tired, touching her big belly, she felt confusion and surprise. "Zahara?" Littlestar wasn't close to the female but she was a clanmate and she was concerned for her regardless. The fluffy tabby limped over, ears down slightly. "Everything all good or..?" Maybe this was a situation that required Ravelights.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Littlestar was asleep on her bed. Odd considering the state of the day- it was sunny and perfect for a leader of all people to go on about her duties. But she was tired and her body seemed to stick to the damned bed itself. She didn't move even when her eyes were open and searching the room. So she came to a solution that when the 'feeling' of being stuck passed, she would leave but for now she would sleep it off. Maybe when she awoke she'd feel more bothered to do shit. So she slept. And whilst she slept, her teary eyed daughter snuck into the shared room and placed the letter on the ground before quietly departing. She didn't wake up until she heard Ichigo shout. His name echoed in her dreams and at first, she believed it to be a part of the dream-realm but then she opened, the echo of his voice faded and she heard Aron's voice join in on the mix. Technokit is gone?

The fluffy tabby practically stumbled out of her bed, claws being the only thing that provided her with grip as she made her way down the steps to the main lobby, golden eyes wide and on the letter clutched in Ichigo's paw. "What?!" The Monarch growled, golden eyes quickly scanning the letter. Her reading wasn't perfect so it took a decent amount of time until she finished the letter. I'm going. I'm leaving and I don't want any of you to find me. Don't look for me and don't even think I'm worth it. I'm a monster and I'll hurt you again if you come near me so just - all of you stay safe okay. I'll miss all of you... It clicked. Right then and there with the word 'monster' and 'hurt'. Techno had been the creature that had eaten HawkClanners. Techno had done the attack that day she had been away. This was all her own daughter. It couldn't be though. It had to be something else, it just fucking had to be. Littlestar outright refused to believe that her little girl could eat her own clanmates. Maybe it was a hollow? Her golden eyes moved to Ichigo, wide. "It wasn't her- whatever it was- it wasn't her." Littlestar stated angrily, not nessecarily directing it at her father.

But the main factor here was that her daughter was gone because she believed herself to be a monster. And that frightened Littlestar. God knows where the little gal had gone. The loner lands? Fuck no. Please, god, no. Supressing the motherly panic that rose in her chest like a dark ominous wave, she swallowed and put on her leaderly face. "Okay. We're gonna send out a search patrol to all allying clans, including neutrals. If that doesn't work, we'll go to the enemies. Ichigo and Aron, do you want to tag along with me?" The two were recently promoted Regents, this would prove their worth and also they were both capable animals and would help her in case things got violent when they went to enemies. Her voice was cold and calm. Any emotion that she'd felt beforehand had seemingly vanished beneath the Monarch-Mask.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Littlestars worry peaked when her sentence was cut short by a very visible wave of pain. As Zahara sent her an almost desperate look, something she felt deeply considering how panicked she'd been when she'd given birth, the tabby lurched forwards but it was too late because the cougar was out cold. "Oh fuck." She voiced, attempting to gently paw at the now floppy wildcat as if it might awaken her. Didn't she need to be awake for these kinds of things? "Ravelights!" Littlestar yelled before turning back to Zahara, gritting her teeth and narrowing her eyes. Well, seems like the next few minutes or hours would be a hell of a ride.

She was right. Three. Two of them were not moving whatsoever. She licked them in attempts to get their heartbeats up and going like the one that was wriggling in a mess but it was all to no avail, they had no response. Grief settled in her heart and she pushed the image of the burnt baby from her mind. Maybe it was the familiar smell of birth or maybe it was the emotion in the air at witnessing another girl, like her, push out a child, but tears pricked her eyes. "Zahara, Zahara, look. One beautiful little boy." He was tiny, yes, but she had a feeling he would make it. He would be the survivor of the litter, she fucking willed it. Cleo came forwards, watching the newborn cub with some sort of curiosity. She wondered if Cleo understood the dead babies and she hoped to god not. Littlestar shifted a little to block the catsunes view of the stillborns as she asked the question, a slight grimace appearing on her scarred muzzle. "They're... well.." She breathes in heavily and exhales sharply. "They're not alive, Cleo." It's harsh but as her parenting goes, she can't lie to the kids. She'd already lied once about the father (who was now dead). Littlestar turned back to Zahara and attempted to gently nudge the cougars shoulder.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Littlestar knew she was terrified- she had to be. A frightened little doe that hadn't even learnt to speak yet. Of course, even if Atlantic was a feral (which she clearly wasn't judging by the note tied around her neck), Littlestar wouldn't have the guts to harm her. Killing baby deers was too cruel a thing. She just stuck to hunting voles and mice and rabbits, the small and easy prey. She lowered herself slightly to appear less intimidating to the fawn and watched as she extended herself towards Beck. Huh, so the ghost had taken her under his arms? Brow muscles raised slightly. She had heard about the incident between him and Tec (which had ended up with him mentoring her) and although she wasn't happy with it, she liked that Tec was learning. Still, he was an asshole and she wasn't so sure if it was a good idea for him to take care of Atlantica. "If you're gonna take care of her, ya need to know what shit she eats." A baby deer like her would need milk, and lots of it. Did Beck know where to get that stuff? Well, she didn't so she somewhat doubted he would too.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — aron rn

And even luckier for Aron, Littlestar had seen Bell moving throughout the undergrowth and decided to follow the youth so she could talk to him. The little guy seemed a bit lonely and she figured that initating conversation with him might help a little. But then she heard the sound of something breaking into a million shards- wood, maybe?- and then she heard Bell's concerned inquiry. Her pace picked up until she came to an abrupt halt right besides Bell, releasing a string of curses when she nearly toppled over right into the sinkhole. "Oh, shit, it's okay." Littlestar assured no one in particular as she safetly backed herself up and balanced herself. She heard Aron- wait, was he stuck in there? Are you kidding me, she thought exasperatedly, inching forwards and peering over the edge, studying Aron's condition. He was lying down but he seemed to be fine, surrounded by bits of a broken ladder. "How in the hell- okay, what ever. Let's get ya out of there, captain." She gritted her teeth and thought about what she could do. Well.. there were a lot of things but she didn't have easy access to powers that might let him out. Ichigo would be better equipped for this kinda shit but he wasn't here right now.

"ICHIGO!"

Meanwhile, she would attempt to rescue Aron. The feline pulled the tawny brown rope that hung from her leather belt. She tied one end around a sturdy redwood tree, golden eyes narrowing in concentration. She tugged at it to ensure it's stability before walking back over to the edge of the hole, tossing the end of the rope into there. "Aron, you can either hold onto this and climb up or you can wrap it around you and we can try hoisting you up."

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Huh, wow. She hadn't really expected such a loaded answer from her dad. She thought it'd be a one answer type thing but she guessed not. He had been in love before. It was kinda weird to think about if she was being honest. And considering the fact he was her dad, kind of 'oh god'. But at the same time, she wanted him to be happy much more then anything and if being in love again made him happy then hell yeah! She was all for it. Littlestar listened to him speak about her, silent. Lucy had died, of course she had otherwise she'd be here in his arms. The tabbys golden eyes visibly darkened for him in a brief moment and she glanced at her paws. Then the moment passed and he was off answering everyone elses questions. They were pretty interesting but Ravelights caught her attention most, glancing the Shamans way. She remembered how harshly he'd taken the exile of Lessa. He'd hated her. Perhaps he still haboured hate in his heart. A low dullness in her heart pinged out and she swallowed it down, looking back at the cougar.

He got demoted for bad behaviour- distract, distract- that was unlike Ichigo. Perhaps he'd been a rulebreaker like her when he was young. The thought made a grin appear on her maw. Everyone seemed to ask about his armor from what she'd noticed in past Q&A's and just people meeting him in general. She knew the answer already because she was pretty sure he'd explained it to her one time?

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Oh thank god, Thea was here! Surely the dragon could help should need be but for now it seemed as though the rope plan would work. She grimaced and half chuckled at Aron's bitter words, though she didn't appreciate the subtle jab directed towards her father. She narrowed her eyes and considered cutting the rope but calmed herself. He probably didn't even mean it that way. Littlestar told herself, shoulders tensing. Aron began the climb and she was glad to see it was relatively succesful though he needed a little bit of help to get up. She clambered forwards but before she could even grab his paw, Thea went forwards instead to help him (which was probably smarter as she was stronger then Littlestar) but suddenly the dragon fell over the muddy edge and landed in the pit with a loud 'whoomph'. "FUCKIN' 'ELL!" The Monarch yelled angrily, knowing it was just a mistake but frustrated. At least it was something to do, right? Distract herself from everything?

She tentatively crept towards the edge, looking down with narrowed eyes. "You two alright? Thea, any chance ya can fly out there with Aron in your claws?" She had spied the thick mud on Thea's coat, yes, but she didn't realize the impact it had on the dragons flying.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Littlestar felt sorrow and despair tugging at her being but she couldn't give into them. She already fell easy victim into angers arms and she was determined not to be the fool in this situation even if it fucking killed her. She would find her daughter and she would bring her back home and sort out whatever... was wrong with her. She would. The tabby bit her tongue to bring herself back to reality as Thea entered the room, echoing what was on everyone's minds. Images of Techno flashed in her mind and the feline hissed at herself, quite audibly to everyone present. She's not dead! Don't think of her as if she's dead! Her brain more often then not refused to cooperate and this was one of those times. Blood mingled in with the face of her little girl and she closed her eyes, breathing in with a shudder. Not dead. She practically whispered it. The feline reopened her eyes and looked at Thea, gaze firm and cold. "Take to SunClan, WindClan, BlizzardClan and the Thunderlands, okay Thea? Me and the guys can do the rest. We'll visit the enemies last." She looks towards Aron, nodding at him. "Maybe splitting up his best. Just... visit our allies first, neutrals second and then you and Ichigo will accompany me for enemies."

// hey so it's alright if we only make search threads for the enemies bcs i'm sure you guys don't wanna make a ton of threads~!! we can just say they visited the other clans and got a naught response :3

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — lmfaooo i'm sorrY

Littlestar watched with a clenched jaw, stress and frustration dancing in her mind as she watched the four winged dragon attempt to fly out of there but failing miserably. She almost made it, making Littlestar's ears and face perk up in hope before she landed back on the ground, defeated. "What is it?" A beat passed as she inspected the Guard. "Is.. it the mud?" She gritted her teeth and at Thea's suggestion, she nodded. They would find a way to get Thea out but first they had to get Aron out and then deal with the larger creature. Hopefully Ichigo had arrived by the time they'd pull Aron out. "Aron, when Thea's pushing you out, use the rope to haul yourself up." Just to ease the pressure on Thea a little bit, because who knew how heavy Aron was? Well, she was a dragon but you never fucking knew.

The tabby steadied herself at the edged and clutched at the tawny brown rope, tugging at the end tied around the tree to once again check it. It was fine and safe. Good. She wanted this to be a succesful rescue although it was starting to turn out as a bloody disaster.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Truth be told, she didn't really mind the lacking of ambassador visits. It was either a poor excuse for her own procrastination towards ambassador visits or it was just the truth- so as long as the allies attended events and aided them in battle and whereever, she was fine. It was more important that they helped one another, as allies should do. She stretched out her back legs before folling behind Thea, peering at the familiar tri colored canine. It was Chesspieces, right? Yeah, he had been the HawkClan ambassador for a while now. She offered the seemingly tired male an equally tired grin and seated herself besides Thea. "Yo, buddy!" She grunted, stub tail flickering. "What's up?" She knew exactly what was up because of the gift basket and the fact that it smelled liked freshly baked shit. She loved that. She barely avoided lifting her noise into the air and sighing at the smell- it was so nice.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Littlestar was incredibly tired. Of course, it wasn't all as terrible as it'd been when she was pregnant. The kids, when they'd belonged in her womb, had been draining her energy day after wretched day. It was better now but of course she still found herself in rough patches that made it hard to get out of her bed. Still, she persevered. It was odd considering the state of her mind was nearly always dark and she forced a light mask onto her face but she managed- perhaps it was the kids that were driving her to continue? Or the clan as well? She didn't quite know but it had to be a mix of things that were keeping her alive despite being so close to the brink of death.

Flexing both front paws, she pauses before heading over to Cleo, Aron and Bell, noticing the restless-like state of her catsune kid. "Just eat it up, babe." The tabby frowned, sitting besides Aron and viewing Cleo with neutral golden eyes. She loved her kids, she did, but they had to play a part in why she was so exhausted a lot of the time. Littlestar licked her dry lips and attempted to press her maw against the top of Cleo's head.

TAGS ✦ ✧ ✦ — Thunder shook the camp and lightning illuminated the wary faces of her people. Rain battered the ground as well as the wooden treehouses that lined the famous redwood forest. The sky was dark and solemn and the air was cold. She looked up as a crack of lightning casted dramatic shadows of the trees onto the wet grounds, dark golden eyes narrowed. Finally after a drawn out contemplation, she turned and headed into the lobby, walking up the red staircase and seating herself at the top. Today she'd have to speak louder to get her voice heard as the thunder drummed in the almost pitch sky. "Hawkfam, meeting time!" It almost seemed as if the HawkClanners had been gathering outside for at once they poured into the room, a good majority of them sodden by the rain. Her own fur was plastered against her body and she had lost the illusion of being plump as her fur was not puffing out to the sides. Littlestar eyed them all, still as can be, before nodding. She was about to start the meeting, opening her mouth to speak when more thunder sounded out, as if it was interrupting on purpose. Comedic timing, she supposed. Some HawkClanners gave half hearted grins and chuckles on her behalf and she responded with a smirk, crooked teeth glinting. "Alright, alright. Seems like the weather doesn't want me to speak today, huh? Anyways, let's get this party started. Activity is, as always, the first thing I mention. I gotta say it's defenitely slowed down since the past two weeks and whilst it's not horrible, it can defenitely be better. I mean, we're a frontboard now, aren't we? We gotta step shit up by a lot. So let's do this! But, as per usual, ya gotta stay inclusive and all that yummy-good-clan shit." She stretched her back leg out and settled back down. "We don't have any ally events this week but I do wanna ask if anyone wants to host this weeks weekly task! Anyone can do it- all ya gotta do is give out some tasks and shit." She raises her brows to see if anyone in the crowd is willing to take on the offer of hosting it. It's often pretty fun to do but when a lot of people vie for a task it can be difficult figuring out what to give.

"Joiners this week, alright, alright. We got a dual membership gal from the Thunderlands, her name is Harper and she seemed pretty rad if a little stressed. Nothing some good friends can't fix though. Rosekit is the next joiner, he's a cutesy little guy some peeps found on the border. Welcome him a whole lot, kay? Zahara is an old member of HawkClan and she recently returned back here and also gave birth to a beautiful little kid! Welcome her and the kidlet! Atlantica was another kid found on our boder, parentless but adopted by Beck. She's gonna be well taken care of but as she recovers, I need you all to be on your best behaviour towards her, at all times. And last but not least, another frickin' lost kid found on our borders. Her name is Shiloh and she's equally adorable to every little kid we've ever found on HawkClan. Give a big ol' HawkClan welcome to every single new member!" It was not as many joiners as last weeks but still quite a lot. There was a concerning number of them turning out to be little lost kids though and it made her wonder if this place really was a safe haven for abandoned kids. She'd come here, not as an abandoned kid though, just a little girl seeking a peaceful home away from the violence of the Exiles. Sighing softly at the memories, she waited for everybody to settle before continuing. The rain grew heavier and trickled down the glass windows opposite her. Thank god the hole Ichigo had accidentally created on his returning had been covered up otherwise more people would've been soaked today. She shivered and glanced briefly outside, catching the camp as it was lit up by lightning.

// part two coming ur way soon <3