[fancypost borderwidth=0; width: 350px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; line-height: 12px] hehe its all good! <3
Posts by sadify.
This is an archived version of FeralFront. While you can surf through all the content that was ever created on FeralFront, no new content can be created.
If you'd like some free FeralFront memorabilia to look back on fondly, see this thread from Dynamo (if this message is still here, we still have memorabilia): https://feralfront.com/thread/2669184-free-feralfront-memorabilia/.
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]as soon as she had spoken about caspar kurt had just cried harder, gently moving more into her, burying his face into her body, his messy blonde hair everywhere as he just cried his broken heart out, just feeling so horrible. he had no idea what was happening to him, what was goung on and it was just making him simply sick to think ahout. all he wanted was to be happy, was for things to go back to how they used to be. he didnt want his mind the way it was, he just wanted to be normal. he just held onto her like a small child would, before softly he had calmed down, trying to keep calm as he had slowly oulled back, looking up at her. "no matter what happens... i will always love you abd caspar with all of my heart. no matter what my heart will always belong to you." he had stated aoftly, actually seemung to function normalky for the first time in weeks.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]kutt had just looked up at her with those pained blue eyes of his, nodding numbly for a moment as he had just closed his eyes, one or two last tears moving across his face as he had cuddled deeper into the soft blankets like a child would, staying close to her as her soft singing and humming, along with the feeling of her hands moving through his hair caoming him. he hadnt slept for ages, and it was obvious. he look so exhausted, with dark circles forming under his eyes. he just was so sweak and broken. being close to her thiugh, it very suprisijgly didnt seem to takr much time at all for him to be lulled into a deep sleep, his facial features and his breathing claming down drastically as he had began to sleep, on his side facing her. therereally was something horribly wrong with kurt- and althiugh that had been a good moment, it was simply one out of countless bad ones since yhe moment he had gottsn home. he really just needed help as soon as he possibly could.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”♓ | ♂ | ⚤
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]dave and krist had looked up at her as they heard her come in the room, hoping and praying that things had gone okay with kurt. both of them cared about topax and kurt and caspar, caring about thier best friend and his fiance and child. it was hard on them too- noe to mention that kurt wasnt just known by them, after the band had blown up he really was a celwbrity of sorts, and by now he already had tons of money loading up in their bank. it just made things so much harder. dave had let out a sugh of relief at her words as krist had just nodded, looking up at her "im guessing things went okay?" dave asked quietly, the long brown haired guy a few years younger than kurt had asked as he had looked up at topaz. krist was a year or two older than kurt, with almost black ahort hair, being extreamly tall. they both wanted their best friend back to how he was before- the funny, caring and motivated person he had been. kurt remained asleep updtairs as the always happy jingles had curled uo on topazs side of the bed, purring softly.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
[align=center][fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]YOUR MAIN TEXT HERE
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]dave had sughed at her words, his eyes having gone wide as hw had heard the point about him hearing voices, seeing topazs tears. it made him feel horrible, as it did krist. they both just felt so terrible. "topaz.. cmin.. sit down," he had spoken as he had gestured towsrss the couch next to them. "just relax.." krist ahd spoken quietly before he had looke back towards her. "i think you rwally nwed to gdt kurt to the hospital- and quickly, bo matter what he tries to do.. he needs to get checked out, and quickly." davs had suggestee, looking towards her before looking down. kurt just needed to be checked out- and the sooner the better, really. somethint was obviously so terribly wrong with him.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]dave and krist had no idea what to do at first as she had burst out into tears. this wholet hing was destroying her- kurt was destroying her, and he was her fiance- he loved her, and yet he was still completely wreaking her. kurt would defiently be terrifiyed going back to the hospital. he would never stop thinking that what had happened to her was his fault, he would never stop believing it ahd all been caused ebcause of him. no matter what he just couldnt look past that, he just believed it was his fault- terribly. dave and krist had shook their heads at her workds. "no, topaz.. don't apologise.. there's no reason too, at all.." dave had spoken quietly as krist had moved to gently and confortingly rub her back. as dave had looked towards her, he had suddenly seen the bruices as a frown had came over his face. "um.. topaz.. what are these from," eh ahd spoken gently as very liughtly his fingertip ha moved over one of her arm
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]( sorry i havnt eeplied in ages! ive had absolutely no muse and literally no motivation to go online at all, if my posts are a hit rusty for a while im so sorry! )
dave had noticed her flinch as his very light touch had met her pale skin, Iinstantly pulling back slightly, knowing that something bad had happened to her physicallyto happen. a part of his mind instantly went to murt maybe havjng done something bad to her, but he just couldn't imagine him doing anything- although, he had cheated on her, broken every promise. he had no clue that it would be bullying becauae of her relationship with kurt. kurt hadnt even noticed any of this, when if he was perfectly fine like he had been he would have been so concerned over her and be by her side every minute helpinf her get better and defending her and things like that, just being there for her. but no. kurt was sleeping upstairs, with a now aeemingly brand new mental condition that caused him to turn into basically a completely different person. he really was dyong in front of everyones eyes. dave and krist had both looked at eachother as she had sais that she has just fell, knoeing clearing that she was lying. and thats when dave saw that word on her weist.. "topaz.." daves voice almost seemed scared as he had gently held her hand our so her weist was in clear veiw. "who did this to you..? i know you didnt fall.. you didnt do it right.. kurt couldnt have either.. did he?"
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]both dave and krist had felt horrible. girls at school? withiut having to ask they knew what it wouls be about- her and kurts relationship. kurt now was basically famous, no matter hw much he hated it. people knew who he and his band was, people wanred information on him- and himnin general. the praise for him was huge with his new music, althiugh he blocked it out. their personal information was getting out out for all the tabloids to exploit and twist into their own stories. kurt had never wanred it all to happen. sure, hd had always wanted to do something musically- it was his drraam, but just having done those performances all that time ago had been enough for kurt. dave and krisg just looked at her, dave letting go of her hand before hith of them, seeming as if they were synced had arapped their arms around her, both of them holding hwr in a warm and confortibg group hug, trying to confort her and chear her up. "stop apologising- theres no need too.." krist had spoken softly, not wanting her to feel as if she had to keep saying sorry for nothing.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]they ahd both held her for a while longer, rist denying her words. "no- none of this is your fault.. you can't help what's happening to kurt, you did absolutely nothing wrong.." he had spoken. dave had held her close for a minute, in a protective hold like kurt would have once donw before they both let her go. "look.. kurt is going to be okay- and so are you. it may not seem like it right now, but soon things will get better. i know kurts going to freak out, but you just have to get him to the hospital. you just have to. the sooner you get him cheeked out and figure out what's going on with him the sooner things will get better.." dave had spoken looking towards her/
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]dave had nodded to her words about letting him sleep. kit had seemed as if around the time she had said that kurt had suddenly woken up, his bright blue eyes opening up after a very short sleep. he hadn't slept properly in ages, and being the way he was in his head it was really difficult for him to stay asleep. he had shifted slightly under the sheets, keeping his eyes shut tight as instantly voices returned, the sound of a constant, loud screem in one ear. jingles still slept on the bed beside him, the cat all curled up. kurt just laid there as the voices got louder. he would have episodes like this all the time. after a fwe minutes he couldnt help it as a loud yell would come from upstairs, his weak voice screaming 'shut up' loudly. before this, dave nad krist had watched her seem to swollow her feelings, hearing her whisper to kur tht she was sorry. it made them both feel horrible. their eyes had both goen wide as they had heard the yell from upstairs.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]kurt had never meant for those words to be remembered- really never meant fo4 them to be sayed. when kurt felt extreamly weak or extreamly upset, he had always had a really nasty habit of ourting people down to make himself feel higher. kurt wasnt perfect- it was just another oene of the selfish habits he had. he would always regret all those mean, horrible words he had said to her, he stoll felt sick thinkinf about them all. he had basically ignred jingles as he sat there, coverkng his ears witb his handsnjn desperation and obviously beginning to get really distressed as he had came in, his body tense as she had touched it, kurt barely able to hear her words as the shouting and the words grew louder in his head, telling hkm to say and do horrible things to topaz that he woild never even dare think about even if his life depended on it. he seemed unable to just sit arill as he pulled at his blonde hair,his eyes shut tight as he just wanted to burst out into tears after a second. "shut up!" he screamed again, loud,yelling as he seemed so overwhelmed ans almost mad. after a secknd he had turned to her though, his eyes finally opening. "topaz,you have to leave before i hurt you again. you have to leave me and never come back. someones trying to kill me and if you dont go, its going to happen. i know it. theyre stalking and watching me through the mirrors topaz, you have to go. they keep watchint me and you dont leave they say that i have to hurt you- even if i dont want to.." and now kurt was speaking nonesence, beginning to get upset, obvious clear paranoia coming out of him, kurt really believjng wverything he was saying. back down stairs dave and krist knew that topaz needed to just be with kurt alone,as they had both moved to caspars room, deciding to try to calm him down for her- ir at least try too. after krist changing his fdiaper which turned into a bug joke for the both of them, caspar has seemed to takr largly to dave, calming down as dave held him. dave had always been good with children, yet krist swore to never have kids, ever.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]its not that keist had a disliking towards children, he just had thought of himself since a very yiung age that he was never going to be a father, wasnt very capable of it. he had been raised in such a way alsi loosing his father early, so it was just the way he was. he still really liked caspar though, he was absolutely adorable and krist couldnt help but smile as he saw that adorable little grin as hr tried to grab his nose. caspar was really a perfect mix of his mother and father, having identical blue eyes to kurts, ans a very simular face to topaz. dave ans krist had played around with caspar for a while, until they brgan to ger more worried hearing the following yells from kurts voice upstairs.
kurts yands shook like crazy as she tried to hold them, kurt listening to her words as his pained, tear filled eyes looked at her. there used to be so much love and sparkle in those eyes, now all there was was pain. "no! no!" he had suddenly yelled atin, tears finally coming as he bagan to cry,tqiing his hands away from her as he began to desperately wipe at his ters,his ehole body shaking so crazily. "topaz, please,please," he basically begged. "thwy keep telling me to do thibgs to you, and i cant! im going to die!" kurt had kept his voice loud as hr covered his face, crying into his hands. by now dave and krist had put caspar back in his cot, coming upstairs and not hesitating on walking straight though the doors, seeing kurt the way he was frightening. zthey both looked at topaz tooo., before krist had spoken up. "kurt.. we need to take you somewhere buddy," [/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”♓ | ♂ | ⚤
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]kurt just sag there, btoken ans overwhelmed. kurts eyes had gone wide as she had said that she wasnt coming. as she had moved to hug him back, kurt had actually hugged her back. it was strange for hin being like this, but he had. he had hugged her back, protectively and lovingly just like he used tp. when she had pulled back for a second, his eyes showed a small part of the old kurt as he looked at her. for that split second it was as if nothing was wrong, hr was just the same old happy kurt that he had been. "i loved you so much topaz, youre the only one that will ever help me," and with thode words, and her lraving kurt became this new kurt again, yelling for them to get off of yim and crying as dave and krist began to firce him oyt of bed and down the stairs before going to the car, forcing him as he thought againdt them,yelling and crying liudly as he did so, calling out for topaz to help him all before the house was auddenly quiet as the backdoor closed, dav e and krist still struggling to get him into the car. kurt was only weak though, and before long he was freaking out as they drove him thede, desperately trying to open the locked door and window, aanting to get out as he began to hypoventalate.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
[align=center][fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]YOUR MAIN TEXT HERE
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]kurt was just so messed up, he was just so confused mentally within himself that it was so hard for him to be able to show any emmotion towards anyone at all, including topaz and how he ca re ed for her and how hr loved her. that moment they had justbhad then had been sich a struggle for kurt. the boys hadnt been torturing him or anything, just having to hold him as kurt was freaking out and wpuld obviously do something if he could get away. it didnt take long before they got to the hospital as the overwhelmed kurt would soon be sat in a cold chairnin a doctors office as the others spike about his wothdrawing from everyone and everything, what he had said about hearing voices, some of the things he believed and how paranoid he was, and just tryed to explain in the best way possible what was wrong witb him. of cource they wouldnt be as good as explaining it than topaz. kurt had barely managed to calm down, as he knew that if he ahdnt he would bd in a hospital bed, kurt rrying not to burst out into tears and trying to keep himself calm as he sat there, stairing forward.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]eventually kurt would get out of this- especially with medication, for the thing that was obviously wrong with him. but right at that moment, kurt was scared. he was scared for himself, for topaz, for caspar.. for his life. he of cource would never admit it, but it was really horrified. really, he was beginnign to go through this long before he had gone on tour- but he hqd pushed everything back, focusing purely on topaz and caspar and his new career in music, which obviously only made things worst though. being on tour had really just messed him up big time, especially everything he had done when he had been on it. the guilt that he felt like was destroying him, the suicidal thoughts thatjust never went away. and then.. this. the voices came, the delusions that he really didnt know wern't real. he really believed the things he had said to topaz, about people watching him and wanting to kill him, and in his mind the voices were commands, they told him what to do and how, and if he attempted to ignore them they would just gt worst and worst, reminding him of what he had done to her and he would really take that seriously. not to mention this new height of sences he had, it was like sever anxiety to the point that it was making him crazy- although eh already felt as if he was insane. all he wanted was to be with topaz and caspar though. he continued to sat there as he was forced to speak, being asked questions constantly, kurt getting t the point where suddenly he was unable to take it. he sat there as the voices came stronger, not answering one of the questions before he suddenly stood up, quickly moving to get out fo the room, panicing as he couldnt handle it,
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]( alright, i'll just skip to the outcome and then to when dave and krist come home so there's something for you to rp :)) )
kurt had completely freaked out after staff had gone out to get him back, the doctor and dave and krist following as kurt just yelled and almost screamed, cursing as he tried to get him all of off him, kurt just so overwhelmed and feeling so lost as it hadn't taken long until he was in a hospital bed having been there for a few hours now, being planned to be hospitalised for at least two nights, being monitored for his symptoms and and his reaction to the anti-psychotic medication which he had been forced to take. kurt was just in a haze. he was so out of it by now, his freaking out before exhausting him mentally and physically. he felt so abandoned, so lost and scared. one of doctors had already told him.. they believed he had a form of paranoid schizophrenia.. that there was no cure, but with the right treatment he could live a happy and perfectly normal life. and kurt was just so scared.
it would be turning dark when dave and krist had arrived out front of their house, having obviously needed to tell topaz everything. it wasn't long before they sat with her, a sad look on both of their faces as they explained to her how he hd freaked out there, how he was being hospitalised and how he was on medication now. "they believe he's got schizophrenia.." dave had spoken quietly as he looked down
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]kurt was so scared, feeling so alone, abandoned and so lost. they had just dumped him there and left in his mind, they wernt ever coming back for gim. kurt wasnt this person. although he defiently may not come across aa it, he really was an actually very happy and funny person, so unique, kind and caring, just a nice person- topaz had seen that side of him, he had been like it just before the tour. but then, just as things were aeeming to look so far up for yim, this comes along and completely ruins everything for him. he was so sensitive already, this was breaking him in half- teating him inhalf. all he wanred was topaz and caspar and to br back home with jingles and to just be normal. but he couldnt. somehow the word had gotten out that he was in hospital, and already things were just iut of control.
dave and krist could both clearly see she wasnt taking care of herself- she wasnt caring abiut herself, wasnt fuctioning fully at all. she looked so lost as well, and she clearly needer help. she needed a good meal, a shower and some rest before anything else though. "topaz, hes in the best hands he possibly can be rught now.. we all know how touchy kurt can get, and with whatevers going on with him right now it is just a matter of time before womething tips him over the edge, or he does something. he'll be okay, theyll take good care with him and he'll be on medication. . he'll get better," krist had spoken quietly. after a second a soft silence had come across them, beforedave had spoken up. "topaz.. i think kurt isnt the only one who needs help right now.. have you been taking care of yourself?" he had asked quietly, looking towards her. the answer was obvious, but he had questioned her anyway to see if she was going to be honest with them abiut hoe she was or not. it was clear she was struggling.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]Both Dave and Krist knew she was right abo what she had said. He did need someone there. He was reacting badly, even though he was so drugged up on medication by now that he felt like a literally zombie. Kurt felt so alone and scared. He was all alone there, there was no one he knew. They just abandoned him there, in his head they had lift him for good and were never coming back to get him after everything he had done. And kurt didn't blame them. He just wanted anyone familiar- someone. Marcus deceit boy would help him, a lot. Krist had let out a soft sigh at her words over her doing just what she needed. She really needed help, it was ibvious she was struggling through all of this. So Krist spoke up. "Topaz.. I'm not trying to sound rude, and please don't take this the wrong way- but you look terrible. We can both see that your struggling, and we don't think any less of you because of that. You can talk to us.."
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots
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[fancypost bgcolor=; border: 6px solid #f2f2f2; background: url(http://i.imgur.com/rWMoTpX.gif) center; background-size: cover; width: 130px; height: 145px;][/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=#e6e6e6; border: none; border-top: 4px solid #0d0d0d; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; height: 79px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-top: 1px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 158px; min-height: 79px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 9px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]KURT D. COBAIN —
“birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak to warn us all of the truth, but sadly we don't speak bird.”
[align=center]♓ | ♂ | ⚤[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost] [fancypost bgcolor=#f2f2f2; border: none; border-left: 5px solid #0d0d0d; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: hidden; padding: 7px; margin-left: -4px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; height: 250px; overflow: auto; padding: 0px; padding-right: 24px;][fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 309px; min-height: 250px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; font-size: 10px; color: #0d0d0d; line-height: 8.5px;]the last few months had seem to go by in a flash for kurt. things seemed to be going well, everything going smooth so far eith the pregnancy- which all seemed to dtop when the doctors gwere concerned about her. she acted as if it was no big deal from ehat kurt could see, but kurt was obviously worried about her. he wiuls always fuss over her, and with a combination between his worry and the fact that she was pregnant lead kurt to be extra caring and protective. his bond with leo was still crazy dtrong as well. kurt had been out with the band for the day, doing a few interviews whrn he would come home. he had opened the front door, beginning to remove the heavy jacket he had worn, doin careying it upstairs, thinking that maria and oucy were upstairs in the bedroom since he hadnt seeen her anywhere doenstairs. kit wasnt long before a tired and wirn iut kurt had walked through the door, a soft smile on his face as he saw her eith leo. "hi.." he had murmered softly, moving over to gently place a liss on her forehead before he had moved towards thd closet, wanting desperatdly to chnange iut of his unconfortable jeans and just fall asleep.
[/fancypost][/fancypost][/fancypost][fancypost borderwidth=0px; font-size: 1px; color: transparent; letter-spacing: 5px; margin-top: -13px;]marsy loves you lots