Posts by Hanakosong

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    They arrived at the stream to the cadence of Tansyface's babbling in time with the stream's. Icefeather set down her marigold and merely observed her friend's anxious demeanor, indigo eyes flicking down to Tansyface's mud coated belly and well...the mud certainly did a good job of masking the tell tale signs of pregnancy, but it was hardly necessary at this stage because only experienced queens and medicine cats familiar with pregnancy would be able to tell. She wasn't quite showing, but there were other signs. And it made sense now, all the things Icefeather had noted as being just off with her friend lately.

    "I'm not here to judge you, Tansyface. I think you're perfectly capable of making your own rational decisions. And you're correct, you'll have ShadowClan to support you, but you'll also have me in your corner. Tansyface, you're my best friend, and however this turns out, I'll be by your side the whole time." Stepping forward, Icefeather nudged her nose against Tansyface's muddy shoulder in a warm gesture before flicking her ears in the direction of the stream.

    "Now, as I said before, don't catch a sickness. You don't know what was living in that mud puddle before you, so wash yourself off and then we can talk more on the way back."

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    Blinking at Tansyface quietly for a moment, Icefeather's indigo eyes flit up and down her friend, lingering on the drying muddy spike of fur before her expression turned a bit exasperated. Sighing, the medicine cat set her herbs down, wanting nothing more than to whack her friend over the ears for being so strange. "It was about sitting in the mud, but also in general," Icefeather said softly once she had licked the bitter taste of marigold from her jaws. She might have been overwhelmed, but the medicine cat had been keeping an eye on her friend regardless. She didn't know exactly what was going on, just knew that something was distinctly off about Tansyface lately - or at least more so than normal.

    "I'm going to worry about you regardless of how tired I am, though," Icefeather said, expression and voice softening with fondness for her longtime friend. "Let's make a trip to the stream to clean you off, and then we talk about that over-heating on the way back to camp." Scooping up her marigold bundle again, Icefeather's indigo eyes were expectant as she flicked her tail in a gesture for the other to follow along. Her paws ached with use, but she didn't mind a trip to the stream, because she could soak them there and dispel some of the heat exhaustion lingering from the oppressively hot air that seemed to have settled in lately.

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    She was going to walk off, but Tansyface's call had her paws halting. The wild she-cat always had a way of pulling the medicine cat's attention, dragging her back from thoughts and into reality. Her friend was grounding, even if Tansyface didn't know she possessed such an ability. It was likely better she didn't know, so that she wouldn't abuse the power she held over the white tabby. However, Icefeather knew that even if Tansyface was aware of how she could ground the other she-cat with just a simple call of her name, she still wouldn't abuse the ability. Either way, Icefeather paused in her steps, indigo gaze swiveling over her shoulder to look back at her friend, submerged in the mud puddle for StarClan knew what reason. Her eyes were expectant, waiting for her odd friend to continue.

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    She came limping from the shadows that curled around a bush nearby, indigo eyes dull with exhaustion, steps unsteady from her limp, but she appeared somewhat alert. The white tabby was slightly bedraggled as she approached, glancing Tansyface up and down for a quick moment before setting down the bundle of marigold she had. "Don't catch a sickness, Tansyface," before scooping up her herbs once more and continuing to limp off. If she had more energy, more presence, she might stay behind and prod, but Oliveslip needed training, the herbs needed sorting, the elders needed tending, she needed to speak with Sorrelstar, and somewhere in all of this, Icefeather really wanted to take a nap.

    speaking thoughts

    I just want to put my two cents in without starting any arguments because that is NOT what I'm here for, but I want to state what I have personally witnessed over the past month. We have had Ruth's rper step down because they felt pressured, called out, and bullied in the position. Following that, Wildseas' rper stepped down after barely a week. We have no guards, and two head guards, one of whom is my own character. I will be the first to admit, I'm in a huge depressive funk right now and literally cannot find the energy to write up quality posts all that often. Additionally, most of the healers are new to the positions.


    My point with this is, I don't know when this poll was started, but an HP wipe seems a little odd - regardless of what the Clan as a whole thinks. The majority of the HPs are all holding their positions for about less than a month. There's really not been a lot of activity in BC as a whole because once the Blood House event finished, there really wasn't a lot going on. Additionally, a lot of people are on vacations with family and often without decent Wifi. The HPs were all changed up during and after the demolition event to top it off, and are likely trying to settle into the new roles while balancing other characters and being on vacations.


    If everyone thinks an HP wipe is what would be best for activity in BC, that's totally fine, and you are absolutely entitled to your opinion. However, be aware that the HPs in BC have not had the best of luck with having everyone on their side recently, and though the intention of this likely was not for calling out and pressure, that can be how it comes across given recent events.


    An HP wipe without immediate replacements leaves BC at even more risk of falling into inactivity. And regardless, you should not be relying solely on HP rpers to garner the activity in BC on the boards. They are not the sole output of activity and plots. Rp activity fluctuates a lot throughout the weeks and months and boards are not always going to be active and that's just a truth we all have to accept. We all say real life before cat site, and while I totally get wanting to keep boards active, we can't always have both as we all know. Muse sometimes sucks, vacation, work, school, mental health - it all gets in the way. Sometimes you just have to get off the cat site, even if you really want to write posts, and give everything time to settle.

    if it's alright, i would like to keep bianca as a guard instead of a head guard. i don't think having two in the position is necessary, but she worked for the guard position and i know i haven't been active much i would like to explore that position with her more. i think Artemis will do fine as the solo head guard however.

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    Wincing, Icefeather steps forward softly, indigo eyes fraught with guilt as she regards her friend. This was her fault - she didn't know how, but the medicine cat blamed herself anyway. "I didn't mean to distrub you, I just wanted to check on you. I can go, if you'd like me to." The white tabby's gut was tight with tension, guilt, upset. She didn't know how to handle it all, and just wanted to do something to make things even marginally better for the other she-cat.

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    //hhhh sorry i'm so low on muse this is gonna be short
    Icefeather was at Oliveslip's shoulder, letting her apprentice take the reigns on this situation, but present and carefully observant of everything the young she-cat was doing. The white tabby murmured instructions every now and again, indigo eyes flitting between Oliveslip's working paws and Missingpaw's fretful appearance.

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    In that horrific moment, Icefeather hated herself. She wished she could give Tansyface and Shatteredsong everything they deserved, a proper burial, vigil, a second chance at life. But she couldn't do anything other than plead with StarClan to have some mercy for once. She gently laid her tail tip against Tansyface's shoulder and turned indigo eyes full of sorrow on Hornetsting. "Could you go tell everyone at camp what's happened? They should come out this way if they want to pay respects." The medicine cat hated herself, the words felt like heavy acid on her tongue, and she wished things were different.

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    Among all the death, all the sorrow and grieving and dissonance within ShadowClan these days, StarClan had blessed Icefeather with reassurance. They were still there, still watching, still guiding. They sent her a dream, and Icefeather woke up in such a peaceful and reassured state of mind, she almost felt guilty when she brushed past the cleft keeping Tansyface's trinkets safe. But her dream had been clear - a branch, unfamiliar, but named with the knowledge of StarClan - and she knew what she had to do. Admittedly, Icefeather was a little surprised. The choice wasn't an obvious one. The new medicine cat apprentice to-be was quiet, withdrawn, had shown interest form afar. But to Icefeather, if StarClan felt it right, she felt the same and would accept it easily.

    Making her way to where Sorrelstar would normally stand, she did not leap onto the rock, but merely stood below it. The white tabby had stood here too often in recent moons with similar announcements - both of joy and grief. First, to announce Cedarpaw's disappearance, then to announce Summerpaw's promotion, then to woefully proclaim Summerpaw's tragic disappearance. Now she stood here, chest full of potential but wary and worried for the future all the same. If she had to stand here again to announce another missing apprentice anytime soon, Icefeather would lose her mind. She was shocked she hadn't already, especially after Summerpaw.

    "ShadowClan!" Icefeather called out, voice steady. "StarClan have sent me a sign, a dream, and reassured me they are still watching out for us, despite everything that has happened. Additionally, they have guided my vision and paws to a new apprentice through a sign. The new medicine cat apprentice of ShadowClan will be Oliveslip." She would have to take the young she-cat to the Moonstone soon so she could become acquainted with the location, the traditions, with StarClan, with the other medicine cats and their apprentices. But luckily, the half moon wasn't far off. Indigo eyes scanning over the assembled cats, Icefeather searched for the she-cat, wanting to begin moving her into the den.

    OLIVESLIP

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    Icefeather was fortunate to not bear witness to the tossing, flinging, destruction of Tansyface's nest, but unfortunately, she was one to find the aftermath. With Tansyface no where to be found. Sighing softly, the medicine cat slowly gathers up all the trinkets scattered throughout the clearing of camp and brings them to the medicine den. She hides them in one of the unused clefts in the storage portion of her den. The white tabby doesn't know if her friend will ever come looking for those trinkets, those strange collectables she always was so protective of, but just in case, Icefeather holds onto them. She'll look after them, keep them safe for her best friend.

    Slipping out of her den, Icefeather wanders through the trees, following Tansyface's scent until she finds her friend where they buried Shatteredsong just days before. Guilt is a sharp pang in the medicine cat's gut and she hesitates to approach. She doesn't want to disturb, to interrupt, but all Icefeather wants to do is offer comfort, another presence. The white tabby has seen so many of her Clanmates fall apart, be completely wrecked by loss, by disease, by injury, that it hardly fazes her anymore. She still feels upset, still wishes she could comfort them, but she's come to expect their sadness, and knows how to begin to approach them.

    speaking thoughts

    ✧ // but i made it with you next to me

    Glancing at Hornetsting, Icefeather wondered if perhaps it wouldn't be too late to move the body, but she took one look at the stiff corpse and winced. By the time everything was settled, the stiffness would likely have faded to give way to the rot that followed. Standing beside Tansyface, feeling like the worst creature alive, Icefeather gently murmured, "I don't think...I don't think we can move the body. They've been here too long, and not in ideal condition to put in camp for a vigil. But we-we can have a vigil here, surrounded by the flowers and the trees."

    Truly, Icefeather wanted to scream, wanted to breakdown and apologize for not being good enough, for not realizing something was wrong sooner - even though she couldn't have possibly known. The white tabby wanted to give Tansyface everything she wanted, wanted to give Shatteredsong the burial and vigil they deserved. But timing and nature were working against them, and Icefeather couldn't have them moving the rigid corpse, for fear of further trauma.

    speaking thoughts