Can You Love Me And My Dark Side? ~PAFP Ziall Very Mature~

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    Zayn said softly "Thanks guys.... But I.... I just need to be alone" he got up slowly and went to the living room, flopping down on the couch. He was already savoring the nicotine taste in his mouth. He closed his eyes and tried to make the lingering taste last.

    Niall sighed why was Zayn always wanting to be alone. He was always so distant now days he wasn't sure what to think. He sat there and looked at the table thinking of Zayn's reasons for doing what he does. He had never had a serious break up, but he didn't think it would ever be this bad.

    Zayn bit his lip and wondered if he should tell Niall how he felt about him. But he sighed instead. Zayn was to afraid of being hurt again. His arms still burned from his cuts, but his jacket sleeves still covered them, so no one Knew the intense pain he was going through.

    Niall wanted to help him, but if he was so distant how could he. Niall was thinking and thinking, but didn't know why he was taking this breakup so bad. He need something to get his mind off it, but what. He knew he loved him, but did Zayn feel the same way about him.

    Zayn swallowed his fears and got to his feet. He pushed by the other lads and out to the porch "H-Hey Nialler" he said with a nervous smile. He closed the sliding door behind him and sat in the porch chair next to Niall.

    "Hey Zayn." Niall greeted with a smile across his face. The sun shone down on the two lads and it mad Niall's hair look almost pure white. He looked at Zayn his eyes were full of happiness and worry, but not for himself. His worry was for Zayn and Zayn only.

    Zayn looked at Niall, so in awe. How could one boy be so handsome? So sweet? Zayn didn't know... But Niall was. Niall is everything that Zayn has always wanted "How you doing?" He asked, trying to make conversation. Zayn loved his voice... Even if his Irish slurred his words. Zayn still understood him, and he loved it so much.

    "I'm doing okay...I guess." He seemed and a bit distant and his Irish was still slurring his words together, but he didn't notice that it was. He looked out off the balcony and was watching the pale blue skies with his blue eyes. "So how are you Zayn?" Niall asked his friend turning to look at his friend. He was so magnificent, but he was afraid of being rejected by Zayn so he just kept his feelings to himself.

    Zayn swallowed "I'm alright.... So far" he ran a hand through his brown hair. He couldn't help but stare at the handsome Irish boy. He finally bit his lip and looked away, his brown eyes reflecting the light of the rising sun.

    "You seem nervous." Niall told Zayn. "Whats wrong DJ Malik?" Niall asked his voice worried was he having withdraw all ready. He couldn't let him have a cigarette. But he did want his friend to make himself sick. He looked in the house and the other lads were laying around a chillin. He and Zayn sat on the balcony though, and there was an edge to the Bradford Bad Boi's voice, but he couldn't tell what it was.

    "To be honest" Zayn said with a sigh "I am" he pulled his legs up and crossed them underneath him. He then smiled softly "But, when i'm with you, I don't feel as nervous as I was before." His big, handsome brown eyes looked over at Niall again.

    "Uhh..." Niall said, but trailed off unsure of what he was trying to get at. "What do you mean?" Niall finally asked s he continued to think of reasons he would be nervous around him. He looked at his brown eyes with his blue eyes and he seemed to feel connected with Zayn somehow.