DO SOME DAMAGE p, ash
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ASHBIRD
✦ - Oh, yes. He felt it. He felt those doubts, those negative thoughts swirling in someone’s conscience. It was close, and he could almost hear a shriek of anger being released in his mind. This was a soul, who had been searching for justice- someone who needed help. His help. Someone, who needed a friend.
The moment the black apprentice was summoned into the dreary place, Ashbird’s posture changed, pupils growing by just a bit. He watched the youngster’s confusion, not yet approaching, watching him carefully as if scared to go further. “Oh dear, are you... are you okay, bud?” he asked, as if surprised to see him here.
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He was greeted by a strange cat - a tom, older than him. "Yeah, I'm good, bud." The small apprentice answered, trying to ignore the rage and sadness still burning in his stomach. Shadepaw was trying his very best to hide his feelings from his Clanmates - he didn't want them to think that he was weak, as that would be absolutely humiliating. His Clanmates... they had to see a confident, strong, funny Shadepaw - that was the image of himself he had built up of himself ever since kithood. They could never know about his dark thoughts, his insecurities, his angry thoughts. Because that wasn't who he was, not to them, at least.
And yet pain and anger was evident along with sarcasm in the apprentice's voice. His small ears were flattened, and he sounded... older... more tired.
He was fine, that was what he needed to tell himself. He'd just had a bad day. He didn't need to be afraid of whatever he was becoming.
Not at all.
"that's just what gangsters do."
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ASHBIRD
✦ - Ashbird gave a quick nod, scanning the younger tom’s features. “Well... it doesn’t seem like it. Is, ah, is something troubling you?” he asked.
“Oh- oh, sorry, haven’t even introduced myself and already asking personal questions. Name’s Ashbird. And I might call you...?” Of course, he didn’t want to scare the boy. No, he wanted to help- and to help he needed to know the fella’s problems. But maybe getting to know him first would be a good idea.
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Troubling him? Yes, but Shadepaw didn't intend on blabbering on about his feelings. Honestly... who even was this guy? And where were they? This place wasn't anywhere that he recognised.
"Nothing's troubling me," the tomcat answered in a growl, looking straight into the older tom's eyes in an attempt to be more convincing. If Ashbird really thought that he was going to crack so easily, he truly was an idiot. Shadepaw generally didn't confide in others, as he hated showing any signs of weakness. "I'm Shadepaw," he then questioned, "You have a Clan name - are you a Clan cat?" He tipped his head to the side as he spoke. That was a simple enough question - nothing too personal or intrusive, unlike what Ashbird had asked him.
"that's just what gangsters do."
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ASHBIRD
✦ - Ashbird gave a chuckle. “Of course I am... well, I used to be at least,” he ended, twitching a bit as if something about the words hurt him. “It’s a nice name! Very nice, but... what do you want me to call you?” he questioned. “Haha- yeah, I know, sounds weird. Forget it, I’m a weird cat...” He gave a nervous swish of his tail, along with an awkward smile. “Sorry if I made you uncomfortable or something... not used to guests too much...”
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Shadepaw was puzzled by the question - Shadepaw... was his name.... he hadn't really ever thought about what it would be like to be called something different. He briefly considered telling Ashbird that he wanted to be called 'Shadestar,' but as the strange tom continued to talk, he decided to just keep his jaws shut.
It seemed this guy didn't really know how to socialise - that was sad, but that was also not his problem. He didn't care for Ashbird, not yet, anyway - he had only been talking to him for the past minute or so.
Guests... so Ashbird lived here, wherever here was. Tipping his head to the side, the small tom asked, "Random question, but where exactly are we? I don't remember walking here or anything - maybe I bumped my head... but I seriously don't recognise this place."
"that's just what gangsters do."
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ASHBIRD
✦ - Ashbird tilted his head in confusion. “So you- oh, guess a dream got you here then. Cats stumble upon this place from time to time. This is the Dark Forest, ah- welcome I guess? Seems like you’re not too familiar with it.” He awaited an answer in fear. Cats could leave and then he would never see them... he just needed a friend. He’s been here for years, a lot of years. It sucked, not being with your loved ones. Especially because of the bad reputation this place carried.
That was only what the other Ashbird thought though- of course all he wanted was a trainee to affect the world. He was tired of having no impact for so long. He was starved for fame. His name should be remembered. -
The Dark Forest.
Of course this was the Dark Forest.
Shadepaw wasn't even surprised that Ashbird had visited him, for it was true, he did have dark thoughts. The ThunderClan apprentice genuinely loved and believed in StarClan, but... he did have a darker side to him. A lack of attachment to any of his Clanmates, some pretty messy issues with anger, a vengeful nature, his insecurities...
Did Ashbird perhaps want to train him? Because Shadepaw was down with that. StarClan hadn't been too kind to him so far. Yes, they had blessed him with a group of wonderful friends, cats Shadepaw wouldn't trade for the world. He loved his mother, his father, Ivorypaw, Doepaw, Mousepaw and Serpentpaw with all his heart. His mentor Pumpkinstrut too, and even Shellpaw, though he didn't know her that well.
Yet at the same time, it felt like StarClan was pulling a cruel prank on him. Getting attacked and permanently scarred by a rogue before he was even apprenticed, the embarrassment and humiliation he felt after being beaten by Pepperpaw in a spar... and it was hard not to get angry at StarClan with how... complicated the weather had been recently.
And so, his ears pricked, bright eyes shining. "Oh yeah, I've heard of the Dark Forest," he then asked, "Are you a Dark Forest cat?" The question sounded incredibly casual. It didn't bother him if this cat was a Dark Forest warrior, that sounded pretty cool to him. Yeah, deep down, he was a little scared by the thought that he could be talking to a Dark Forest right now, but he was on guard, and as scared as he was, he also felt a rush of exhilaration.
"that's just what gangsters do."
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ASHBIRD
✦ - The apprentice’s reaction was more than Ashbird could’ve hoped for. Yes, maybe it was time for a more confident approach this time. “Of course I am,” he replied, happy for the recognition. Maybe this would be easier than he would’ve thought; Frostpaw was more of the soft bunch, but the more enthusiastic the apprentice was at the starting point, the quicker he could get him to his side. “I’ve been here for a while now, really; used to be known before, but guess the stories faded through time. Is there anything I could do for you?”
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Ashbird seemed friendly, for a Dark Forest cat. Perhaps living cats were too quick to judge those who resided here. Perhaps StarClan were too picky about who they let into their ranks.
Friendly or not, it didn't matter. There had to be a reason why the Dark Forest warrior had chosen to visit Shadepaw. Maybe he thought Shadepaw had potential? That made the apprentice's paws tingle... but at the same time, it upset him. Maybe this was a sign that he would never be successful if he was a good cat, a cat with restrictions and boundaries, with some sort of a moral code.
Maybe this was the only place he would truly be accepted.
Shadepaw... did consider himself a bad cat, in a way. He didn't feel as though he fit in with his Clanmates. He felt as though he was less kind, less considerate, less patient. It seemed as though a dark shadow had hung over the small tom for quite a while now, a shadow he couldn't just shake off, that he couldn't just push away and ignore.
But was there anything that Ashbird could do with him? That, he didn't know. If Shadepaw stayed here much longer, he feared that this shadowy forest would pollute his mind.
Maybe it was for the best.
Hesitantly, the young tom asked, "Could you spar with me?" He knew that was something Dark Forest warriors did with their apprentices, but... there was nothing wrong with asking. Ashbird wasn't Shadepaw's mentor, Shadepaw wasn't doing anything wrong, though honestly, the young ThunderClanner had no idea how he would react if Ashbird offered to train him.
The thought that he would probably consider it right off the bat frightened Shadepaw, to say the least. But maybe it was impossible to get through life by being good. Perhaps the only path to victory was the path of darkness instead.
"that's just what gangsters do."
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ASHBIRD
✦ - Wow, getting ahead of himself, wasn’t this little guy? It felt as if he’s already done this once and wanted to get straight to the point. “Oh, you want a sparring buddy? Well, I have the experience of an elder and strength of a new warrior, friend, but it’s true I’m a bit out of practice. I like your enthusiasm, Shade.” Ashbird got into a fighting position, eyeing the apprentice. “What’s your style? Claws or no claws?” He didn’t want the apprentice getting scared, but he would have to learn some more violent methods if he were to ever progress under him.
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"Claws or no claws?"
Truthfully, the thought of sparring with claws scared Shadepaw a fair bit, but this was a Dark Forest warrior, and the last thing he wanted was to look like a coward.
Even if he totally was a coward.
"Claws." The answer was blunt, feigning confidence. The small tom immediately unsheathed his claws, bright eyes fixed on the Dark Forest warrior, ready for any incoming attacks.
He won't hurt me too badly, Shadepaw tried to reassure himself. Ashbird seemed like a decent guy, and didn't seem incredibly aggressive in any way, but Shadepaw still found himself nervous.
He just didn't want to look weak. He'd made a promise to herself never to look weak again, no matter how he truly felt, and he intended on keeping that promise.
"that's just what gangsters do."
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ASHBIRD
✦ - Ashbird considered asking if he was sure, but then slowly unsheathed his claws. He didn’t want to hurt the boy and scare him away, but a good spar was going to be interesting indeed. He hesitantly looked at the apprentice, but then quickly leapt forwards, taking a first slash at Shadepaw, aiming so that it wouldn’t draw much blood. His hind legs were stiff, tilted so they would land at the ground at a balanced angle.
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Shadepaw, who had been watching Ashbird carefully, was able to leap to the side before the older tom could touch him. He doubted he would be able to win this spar, but even if he managed to get a few hits in here and there it would be quite impressive considering that Ashbird was a fully grown cat, having even described himself as 'experienced as an elder.' Unless the warrior had been feeding Shadepaw lies, he should be a very formidable opponent, almost impossible for a young apprentice, even a strong one such as Shadepaw, to defeat.
Leaping at Ashbird, he attempted to roughly sink his teeth into the Dark Forest warrior's leg, aiming to rake his claws down the tom's side at the same time.
"that's just what gangsters do."