crashing down on me | o

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    ✦ ✧ ✦ It was raining.

    Oz sits alone by the Villa Lake outside of the main camp, staring into the water. He stares for a long time, looking deep into his eyes and thinking what had become of him. He is unsure of the world now and what he can make of it without Amelia. He couldn't save her, and yet her voice echos in his head: "I probably won't be much use in war, anyways. One big guy scoops me up and I'm a goner," And yet, where were they now?

    He'd been dumb enough to respond, "I won't let that happen." It was the first time Oz had shown genuine care for someone that wasn't himself. It was the first time he felt warmth in his chest and his heart bubbled and melted. Amelia had him between her paws without even knowing it. The soft paws of the medic as she bandaged his sprained ankle, he could remember every moment of it and every word she spoke. He promised her he wouldn't let it happen. He always thought that he'd tear someone apart before they could come within a foot of her, but how had Toughluck beat him to it?

    He stares into his crimson eyes, the stillness of the water so eerie. "I should have trained you." He says softly to himself, a promise he'd made to Amelia, but never followed through on. Perhaps it would have saved her. Or maybe, Oz was simply destined to be alone. All the progress Amelia had made on opening him up and teaching him it was okay to feel was gone. Once again, the hellhound felt like a capped bottle. He was trapped within his own mind and emotions, sealed far away behind closed doors. Amelia's death simply threw away the key.

    He looks at his legs and his sides, covered in bandages. In a fit of rage, he rips them off angrily and tosses them into the lake. What use was it? What was he supposed to do without her? He grits his teeth with anger, the flames on his paws boiling upwards towards his chest as he tries to contain his anger. Contain it. Contain it. Contain it. He thinks, for every time that Amelia had tried to calm him down. He feels so powerless for a boy who craved so much power.

    Porcelain had been following ozy. His father was the on who would take this hit more then one would admit. He stepped out after a moment rain coating his candy pelt as he came up to the side of ozy. " Papa? " He said softly approaching him hesitant because of the flames licking up his paws. " A..are you o..okay? " Porcelain would turn away nose shoved his nose into the scarf then said. " o..of course your not.. " He said trembling. " No one.. But the strangers are okay " He said very softly. " Because the ...th.." he swallowed hard " The lost of ..yo Your loved one I..isnt fresh with them.." porcelain was trying his best to show he was there for his dad even if he was trembling like a leaf containing his own emotions.

    ✦ ✧ ✦ Papa?

    That was right. He had kids, he had something he was supposed to take care of and worry about. However, his heart was conflicted. As much as he knew Amelia would have wanted him to take care of these children, all they did was remind him of Amelia and his failure. He glances to Porce from over his shoulder with narrowed eyes. For a few moments, he's silent, unsure of how to respond to little Porce, with aggression or with love. His gaze goes back to the lake. "Are you?" He asks quietly.

    ✖ ✖ - perhaps when porce said strangers, he was referring to brutus. it was rude, but brutus didn't care about amelia. he had no connection with her and knew nothing about her but her name and how she seemed to be some sort of deity, with the way that people treated her. he hoped he wasn't remembered like that. he'd like to just let other creatures eat his body so at least maybe he'd be good for something.


    still, brutus was not strictly an antagonist - he would not be meaninglessly a jerk to someone grieving. he had been there once, as much as he hated to admit it. his father had been killed, his mother died of illness... he liked to think that he was over it, but really the wound had just scabbed over. if you tapped on it, it would hurt. he figured that would just be the way it was for the rest of his life. all he could do was just avoid thinking about it. making long strides, the massive marine beast padded over, looking at porce and ozy. porce was so pathetic - brutus almost felt bad for him. he wasn't sure how he felt about ozy. all he knew was that he was amelia's widow, apparently.


    he spied the pried-off bandages floating in the water and he rolled his shoulders. "dude, you gotta keep those on," was the only advice he could offer, but pried his half-empty box of cigarettes out of his bag. "want one?"

    'Cause you know sometimes words


    ｡･ﾟﾟ･ Cassiopeia meant to be upset at Amelia's death, but she couldn't bring herself to. Amelia had been there when Cass had first joined, and she'd been a comforting constant ever since. She got her into healing, if only as an 'easy' alternative to combat. And she raised her kids with such care and diligence. Oh. The kid felt it now, the crumpling realization that Amelia was not going to be around anymore. Maybe she always felt like this. But she couldn't bring herself to cry. Maybe she just doesn't grieve like everyone else. Rain was supposed to be melancholy, but all it did was make the medic's snow gross.


    Cass watched Ozymandias and Porcelain from a fair distance until Brutus showed up, then she fished the gross bandages out of the water and held them out in disdain. Ew. "I'll redress you later. I can't tell you how to grieve, but know you can talk to me. At least I knew her." She was glad she'd just had this grieving revelation- otherwise she wouldn't know what to say.


    have two meanings

    - Tags -

    Mut Alcides-Halycon-----

    Princess of the Brigade


    Mut couldn't bring herself to approach.

    So many conflicting feelings, so much confusion. In her father she saw someone she wanted desperately to press into, to comfort her and tell her it was going to be okay - she saw someone she knew in her heart she could trust...but at the same time, she recalled the hatred in his roar, the blood on his lips. That anger...in her young naive mind, she somehow knew that kind of anger - that kind of grief - changes people. She saw that change first hand in Birdie. So cool and laid back, now a runaway with a temper. Or...had it been Mut's fault that she ran? And if she tried to help her pappa, would he shatter and leave, too? Was it her fault? His? Amelias? Who could she blame? Did it even matter when there was nothing she or anyone else beside Amelia could do to solve this horrid black hole from swallowing them all up?

    Was Mut doomed from here on out to lose everything and everyone?


    Not wanting to begin the process of yet another loss, Mut would not approach. She'd listen from the shadows of a bush as others approached Oz, trying to talk to him, be there for him. She felt anger and remorse, longing and doubt. Soon, though - perhaps even thankfully - the confusion and emotion all melted away, washed down by a cold rain that left Mut feeling heavy. She was...tired...


    So she left the comforting to everyone else. Without ever making her presence known, Mut leaves.


    "Speaking"


    ✦ ✧ ✦ As Brutus comes and corrects his behavior, the hound lets a quiet growl rumble from his throat. Don't fucking tell me what to do, dickhead. He thinks, but he bites his tongue. It was hard to balance what Amelia would want him to do, and what he would like to do. As Brutus offers a cigarette, his crimson gaze falls down to the box. He blinks for a few moments. He's never had a cigarette before.

    Regardless he takes one from the box and pops it into the corner of his mouth. He uses his own produced fire to light it and puff smoke from his nostrils. "Thanks." He grumbles briefly.

    As Cass arrives, he glares at her. Cass . . was a peculiar subject for him. His interactions with Cass were generally never positive until Cass had become Amelia's apprentice. That must've meant that Amelia trusted her to some degree, right? "It's fine." He says. He didn't need redressing. It only brought back hurtful memories of the first time Amelia had held his paw and dressed his wound. It was the first time Oz had ever gotten a good look at Amelia, inside and out for the person she was. It was the day that he'd promised to protect her, and yet, he failed. "I'm not grieving." He objects. He didn't know how to grieve, no, he would just push away everyone and his emotions until he knew better. He would just revert to who he was before Amelia had shown him the light in the darkness he was trapped in.

    'Cause you know sometimes words


    ｡･ﾟﾟ･ Cassiopeia didn't notice Mut. She was too busy rolling her eyes in 12 different ways simultaneously. She was the medic now, and Oz was ating like a small child. Like, smaller than herself. Or Mut. She should ninja-kick that danger straw (Read: cigarette) right out of his mouth. It was her duty as his healer-cat! But she didn't because that old fear of him lingered, especially now that Amelia's dead.


    However she never saw a reason to be afraid of speaking her mind. "Sure you're not. Here, I'll give you a cookie if you let me re-bandage you." Of course not with these nasty bandages, she'll have to walk all the way back to her infirmary. "Also cookies for all your spawn." Children. Obviously. Cass meant children. Maybe if she was alone right now she'd laugh at her own dumb comments, but she held her snicker.

    have two meanings

    - Tags -