Frustration hummed in the back of her mind, she hadn't thought that her problems would dissipate as soon as she'd joined the veil, but she had expected to feel at least a little different. Maybe her problem was hope. If she lacked expectation, if she let go of her anticipation, would she feel less... empty. Or would she feel even more alone, by not being able to be optimistic of the future outcomes.
She feels separate, different, everyone here has family, friends and she, as herself. She is not incapable of forming relations but it is so difficult when you feel as though you experience life in completely different ways. Winter misses feeling, feeling anything other than her emotions, if someone were to hit her and if she could actually feel it she would cry out of joy. Feeling anything, even pain would be better than this numb existence.
Her hollow gaze watches as npc veilers live their life, talking, interacting. She wants what they have, but she does not want the pity that comes with letting someone into her life. Win doesn't want pity, she is not broken and she does not need to be fixed, or at least that is what she tries to convince herself is the truth. Maybe deep inside she knows that she is not whole, she is broken, missing parts of herself. Having others realize the truth would make that more of a reality.
Winter lets out a soft sigh, her gaze drifting from one npc's energy to another. She should do something productive, something to get out of her mind. She could familiarize herself with the territory, being a spooky forest there were many places to explore, to get lost, all the more fun. The snowy feline rose to her paws and started to walk whatever way she was facing. Should she have been accidentally staring at someone the whole time so be it.
[ cdc family & friends influence, only the last paragraph is needed to reply c: ]