FEEL THE CHEMICALS KICKING IN // private, Dahlia

Gordon typically didn't sleep, and after the clouds had gone into the castle, the she-cat refused to go into the castle, back into her room. She had some NPC get her stuffed animals, though, so she'd have some sort of comfort as she slept in a random den in the camp. Of course, she made sure no one lived in it. Gordon curled up in her nest, silently hoping she'd actually be able to get some sleep for tonight.

@DAHLIA COULTER!
"speaking" actions thoughts

//aaa trigger warnings in the first paragraph and second paragraphs for mentions of abuse/rape.

Gordon had a reason for not liking war, other than being afraid of it and losing her loved ones because of it in general. Bill was her father, and stole her and Billiam from Finnishwars at a young age. They weren't exactly... nice to her, and it was a well-known thing that Bill often disowned their children, no matter how much they were like them. Bill claimed they loved their children that were actually strong, but Gordon knew that was a lie. Bill never loved anybody. And the demon definitely did not like Gordon and her brother; they were weak from the start, and Bill thought they could make them stronger by subjecting them to torture. Bill often lashed out at Billiam and Gordon, and got even more angry when the two of them didn't fight back; they often threw things at Gordon and her brother, and yelled at them. Constantly. Eventually one night, Bill decided that they wanted to separate Gordon and Billiam, thinking that separating them would make one of them strong. Bill was somewhat right. Bill grabbed Gordon, covering her mouth so she wouldn't cry out, and took her deep into The Exiles territory. The demon said some things to her (which she couldn't remember; she didn't want to), before advancing towards her. Gordon tried to struggle, although Bill was a lot larger than her and since she didn't fight back, they were able to do as they pleased, thinking their actions would cause her (or Billiam, considering their bond) to learn to fight back. Gordon didn't. Bill threw Gordon onto her back, snarling about how she should be fighting back against them. Gordon only cried in response, earning Bill to lash out at her stomach, then storming off back towards camp.

Billiam hadn't reached Gordon in time to stop Bill's attack, even when Gordon cried at him through their bond. He was, however, able to reach her after Bill left, and helped bring a medic to mend her wound. They both slept in the forest that night, with Billiam curled around her protectively. He would fight anyone who came near -- particularly Bill -- though he certainly wasn't willing to fight anyone for a stupid reason. Gordon, on the other hand, was physically, emotionally, and mentally broken. Her father molested her. And thought she would be okay because of it. Gordon was often plagued with nightmares of Bill's multiple attacks, hence why she often was found awake at night. Gordon didn't like wars and tortures because she believed that people would end up like her, and she didn't want that. Not because she thought she deserved more sympathy than them, but because she was ashamed of how she acted. And yet, she never stopped to fix it.

Gordon was grateful when she was finally able to fall asleep, although that joy was short lasted as a ghostly forest surrounded her. The Juror tensed up and flattened her ears as she heard a voice (but she was slightly relieved to hear it wasn't Bill). "D-Dahlia?" Gordon called hopefully. Maybe she could lead her out of this forest! But wait... what about how she acted at the trial, how she admitted to murder and was proud of it? Maybe her true self is stuck in this forest. That was more wishful thinking than anything, but Gordon was going to believe it.
"speaking" actions thoughts