THE ROAST SESSION | spring gala event

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    [fancypost=;border:0px;width:450px;text-align:justify][center][size=15]LET'S START ROASTING

    [size=8]Beneath a medium sized green canopy resided a large amount of... cushions? So it appeared, there were literally on cushions here and a large cooler of just... ice. Before you could process the sight anymore a beast of a hellhound snaked up to the scene, smoke rising in their wake everytime they took a step. "Aheh, welcome to the Roast Booth pal. Not the food roast, nah, the insult kind. Here everyone literally just insults eachother. Not seriously of course... or at least it doesn't have to be. Nah, just jump in and roast the first person ya' see." Roasting? How strange. As if seeing your gaze travel to the random cooler of ice the hellhound interrupted your train of though, "The ice is for any sick burns you may receive. Aheheh, get it? Sick burns? Psh, anyways feel free to insult away." Stepping to the side once more you're left with the sight before you.


    WORKERS: Biggs (NPC)
    This booth is no longer taking workers.

    Well, there was no one else here, and Fortinbras was terrible at insults, but he had to admit he was super curious to hear whatever insults were directed at him and who knew? Perhaps he'd have a stroke of genius and come up with a funny line. The canine lapped up a chunk of ice and settled on a cushion, sucking it idly, admiring the vibrancy of the tent above his head.

    [center]FINCH HARBRINGER GRIMM
    [font='Times New Roman, Times, serif'][color=white]valentine harbringer x happypill grimm[center]
    "the club isn't the best place to find a lover so the bar is where i go" [color=white]
    .....
    [font='Times New Roman, Times, serif']


    [color=#85aff2]Finch padded into the area, her blue eyes wide as she noticed that the first person she saw was Fortinbras. She was going to have to roast Fortinbras? She giggled, pressing her side against his, flicking her currently long and sweeping tail. [color=white]"'Sup, old man?"[color=#85aff2] she teased, not wanting to hurt his feelings or anything like that.



    [font='Times New Roman, Times, serif'][fancypost=bgcolor=transparent; width:300px; border:0px dotted white; text-align: justify; padding:5px;]

    tags 4/09

    "Not much, tiny-legs." he chuckled back, attempting to inject some playful venom into his voice and probably not succeeding at it. The feeling of her flank against his own made him smile and he tried to give her a little lick on the ear before continuing, "Surprised you managed to walk all the way over here on those little chicken legs." her short legs were probably an easy target, but then so was his age - this new body hit it quite well but he was aging and part of his reason for joining ShadowClan was an attempt to remind himself that life burst with new experiences and exciting days no matter how old he got. Even though he wasn't super old just yet - four months past five years in mind, around one and a half in body.

    [center]


    SIEGLINDE

    48 moons (4 years) | She-cat | Warrior | ShadowClan
    Always pissed off


    "Woah, might want to calm yourself down there, toots. I've been warning everyone that we've grown softer; and it shows. Poor Finch is probably crying internally about her short legs." Sieg casually remarked, making her way over. She wasn't the best at roasting.. but god damn she could throw a sentence or two around and make anybody mad. Roasting, making others angry.. same thing, right? Right.


    [center](c)kittenrobotarmy

    [center][fancypost=width: 500px; text-align: justify]Ahh, he wished Vulpes was here. It was tempting to summon the frustrated kit fox, but Gray refrained. Walking in with a bit of a smirk - finally, a place to constructively unleash the teen savagery and sarcasm that was just building up in his body. "Least her ears make up for it." Not as big as Vulpes' ears, but close. "And youth is on her side too - not so much you two, though."


    Tags | Updated 4/9/17

    [center]


    SIEGLINDE

    48 moons (4 years) | She-cat | Warrior | ShadowClan
    Always pissed off


    "And you're damn right! Who the fuck wants to be young these days, anyways? All I see you spring chickens doing is prancing around, shoving your butts in each other's faces and pretend you've actually done something in the three days you've been alive." Oh, yes. It was heating up more and more by the minute. This was exciting.


    [center](c)kittenrobotarmy

    [center][fancypost=width: 500px; text-align: justify]"Mm, and all y'all oldies just keep talking about the good old days and making other people do your work for you." Seriously, he was pretty sure Cain would be lost without him considering how much the feline made him do.


    Tags | Updated 4/9/17

    [center]


    SIEGLINDE

    48 moons (4 years) | She-cat | Warrior | ShadowClan
    Always pissed off


    "Oh yes, 'the good old days'! The days when apprentices were competent and I was actually able to enjoy my life as a warrior. Oh wait, I wasn't in a clan in those days. I suppose the good old days for me were hunting and clawing the eyes of rogues out! How about you, boy? What do you consider 'good'?"


    [center](c)kittenrobotarmy

    [center][fancypost=width: 500px; text-align: justify]"Right, wonder who it was that ruined it - surely not us spring chickens that have done nothing in our three days?" Yep, this was definitely the right booth for him. The question of what he considered good caught him off guard, as his answer was rather sad. "Any day where I don't have to hear a creaky elder's voice telling me to clean up their shit is a good one." He said, rather than some comment about his mother.


    Tags | Updated 4/9/17

    [center]


    SIEGLINDE

    48 moons (4 years) | She-cat | Warrior | ShadowClan
    Always pissed off


    "Any day where I don't have to listen to apprentices complain about having any semblance of responsibility is a good day in my book, but that's pretty fucking rare these days. Besides, I'm no elder. You put me in a ring with one of those old bastards and you'll have nothing left to bury at the end of the day. Actually, that goes for you too, bud!"


    /oml she sounds like she's drunk when she hasn't gotten her beer yet XD


    [center](c)kittenrobotarmy

    [center]FINCH HARBRINGER GRIMM
    [font='Times New Roman, Times, serif'][color=white]valentine harbringer x happypill grimm[center]
    "the club isn't the best place to find a lover so the bar is where i go" [color=white]
    .....
    [font='Times New Roman, Times, serif']


    [color=#85aff2]Finch had to put her small paws over her mouth to prevent herself from quite literally bursting into laughter as Fortinbras called her chicken legs. Finch was well aware of her legs, and she thought they were a bit funny at times too. She was the furthest thing from self conscious around Fortinbras anyway - she knew that he thought she was pretty, so she didn't have a problem with him poking a little fun.


    [color=white]"You're so mean!"[color=#85aff2] she teased, bumping him. [color=white]"Well, at least I'm not willingly dating a chicken."[color=#85aff2] she giggled, watching Gray and Sieg go back and forth, impressed by their effort.



    [font='Times New Roman, Times, serif'][fancypost=bgcolor=transparent; width:300px; border:0px dotted white; text-align: justify; padding:5px;]

    tags 4/09

    [center][fancypost=width: 500px; text-align: justify]"You're roasting someone that ain't an apprentice - kinda fun watching you waste your quote-unquote 'sick' burns, though." He said sarcastically, a relaxed, cocky smile appearing. Aside from the "good" thing, this was the most content he'd been in a while. "Sure thing, Grandma. Keep telling yourself that."


    Tags | Updated 4/9/17

    [center]


    SIEGLINDE

    48 moons (4 years) | She-cat | Warrior | ShadowClan
    Always pissed off


    "GRANDMA? Lemme tell you something, you little shit. I may be older than you but I'll be damned if I couldn't claw your eyes out right here. You don't fight of packs of rogues alone without a single scar to show for it without learning a thing or two about agility. You know what, actually? Methinks a drink would be nice right around now. I was always a fan of an ice cold beer." With a smile, Sieg added, "But are you sure you can get into the bar, honey? You're looking a tad too young for the adult drinks."


    [center](c)kittenrobotarmy

    [center][fancypost=;border:0px;width:450px;text-align:justify][size=8]The hellhound at the entrance snickered at the roast battle going on before sliding over, his long pointed tongue lolling out of his mouth as he tipped a cooler over sending ice skidding onto the ground around them. "AYEOOOOOO, THOSE ARE SOME SICK BURNS MY HOMIES. THE NAME'S BIGGS AND I GOTTA GIG FOR YOU TWO BITCHES." He produced two colorful balls from seemingly thin air, one being red and the other orange. He distributed them then, one to Sieglinde and one to Grayarea. Sieglinde's popped open revealing a ticket and a note where as Grayarea's revealed a note. "AYEO LOOKS LIKE OUR RANDOMIZER LIKES YOU HOMIE, SIEGELINDE. IT GAVE YA A ART TICKET, TURN THAT IN RIGHT HERE HOMIE TO GET SOME ART OF YERSELF'. ANYHOW, THAT NOTE IS TELLING BOTH OF YOU EXCELLENT ROASTERS TO MESSAGE THE OFFICIAL SHADOWCLAN ACCOUNT FOUND ON THE GUIDE TO GET YOUR MAD ROASTER BADGES BECAUSE YOU EARNED IT HELLA." As if he totally hadn't just yelled a shitton the hellhound retreated back to his post and went silent again.

    [center][fancypost=width: 500px; text-align: justify]Honestly, she probably could whoop his ass, but he wasn't going to give any indication that that was the case. "You actually did that? And it's not just you going senile? Because it sounds like you're going senile - and if you're not, I reckon you did that while you were still in your prime... probably around my age?" He smirked lazily. "I could get into the bar easy - if I was dumb enough to wreck my body with that shit, anyway." His smirk vanished when Biggs came over and yelled at them, but hey, apparently he'd gotten something. Seig got something more which mildly irritated him, like she was winning or something.


    Tags | Updated 4/9/17

    [center]


    SIEGLINDE

    48 moons (4 years) | She-cat | Warrior | ShadowClan
    Always pissed off


    "Senile? Ah, you're probably right; I keep imagining there's a teenage raccoon in front of me, but I know that there's nothing more than a scared little pup just asking for his ass to get beat. And I drank profusely when I was a depressed teen, but apparently nothing bad for me. You, on the other hand; you down a single beer and you'd probably fling yourself off a cliff." She paused momentarily when they were both awarded with gifts for their roasts, but she didn't need it. Being able to roast freely was fun as hell.


    [center](c)kittenrobotarmy

    Scarlett chuckled, padding onto the scene. "It seems I'd have you both beat, boys on the street won't pay ya two compliments for a night in the sheets. Grey here's looking like he fell asleep to early and got himself a sharpie smokey eye. Ginger over here looks like she shaved her fur and temp tattooed her scars, wouldn't be able to hold down caffeine much less the devil's water." She took a seat, waiting for the two of them to pick her apart. The child could care less what they thought of her but hey it was fun seeing people let loose like this.

    [center]


    SIEGLINDE

    48 moons (4 years) | She-cat | Warrior | ShadowClan
    Always pissed off


    Stumbling back in after a drink or two, Sieg heard the roast she had just been presented with. And oh boy, did that fire up drunk Sieg. "Well, y'know, I can't hold down jack shit to save my life, maybe your puny ass can show me how a real girl does it!" She fell over laughing, and continued. "But you young people are so bad at what you do. I'd rather put my trust in a fucking fly than you morons! Ahahaha!"


    [center](c)kittenrobotarmy

    [center][fancypost=width: 500px; text-align: justify]"Scared little pup? Mm, think you might mean this one." He said, tilting his head back towards Scarlett. "You drank profusely when you were young? That explains a lot." He said before rounding on the new challenger. "The boys don't bother because I ain't cheap enough to take two compliments and be ready to go, dunno how you took me for a hoe." Damn rap battle thread making Pyre want to rhyme. "Sharpie smokey eye? You didn't even try."


    Tags | Updated 4/9/17