WHEN I WAS YOUNG . joining

coda wolfgang. · Mar 10th 2017

[fancypost=background-color:;border:0px;width:560px;text-align:justify;font-size:8pt]
since the very beginning, coda had been anything but normal.

it had started many, many years ago in a time coda could hardly remember, almost all memory of it scratched out of her brain and cut away like scissors on wrinkled paper. she was a small girl then; a human one. she had many siblings whose names she could not recall. she was the youngest of their tight-knit family, and (supposedly) destined since birth to be the family jewel. however, despite all the love poured into her growth, despite all of the hours her caring mother spent braiding her silky blonde locks into pigtails singing softly to her and straightening out her pricey dresses and telling her she looked absolutely beautiful, coda was miles away from the perfect, shining gem she had been raised to be.

at age two, her ten-year-old brother found out the hard way that coda really, really didn't like to be touched. his actions were entirely innocent in nature; he came up behind his beloved younger sister and wrapped his arms around her, smiling into her neck and attempting to hoist her up into his lap, cooing sweetly at her like any sweet-hearted sibling would. however, coda didn't take kindly to this, letting out a shrill wail and thrashing around in a blind panic at the sudden sensation she was being engulfed by. her long nails dragged down the older's arms and legs and chest and face until red dripped from his skin and he was forced to drop her. coda hit her head on the way down but she couldn't recall feeling any pain; in fact, she felt nothing but relief to be set free from the cage she had been put in. after that, coda crawled away and hid under one of her sisters' beds. she pretended to be asleep so that when her mother found her she wouldn't be yelled at. however, this didn't stop her from hearing the screaming of her mother past the closed door. the sound haunted her for days.

when she was three, coda's mother and father brought her to a party to meet the rest of her family. she can remember in vivid detail what she felt at the time despite how long ago it had occurred- her frilly navy blue dress chafed against her skin and the ponytail her long blonde hair had been pulled into was far too tight for comfort. she could still feel her hair burning to the touch from the curler used on it hours ago. in fact, it felt like her entire body was scalding hot, like she was being burned away from the inside. any minute now, she swore on her life that she would burst into flames. a part of her supposed that was better than all of these strangers staring at her like she was a sacred object. anything was better than that; coda had never liked attention.

and, really, that just added to the mystery that was her childhood. most children loved to be attended to, even begged for it, but coda? coda would much rather be left completely alone. she didn't like talking. she never had, and likely never would. she much preferred to spend her time folding whole stacks of colorful paper into airplanes and setting them free out in the backyard and in her siblings' rooms to figure out which flew the longest and the farthest and both in both environments. it took her only three days to decide on the best models, and she would remember for decades to come.

(suzanne for distance. lucy for time. joy for both.

don't ask.)

coda was almost five years old when her mother brought her into a place with a color scheme of dull browns and tans and the occasional splotch of dark blue. the whole building smelled of sandpaper and dust and fresh paint. she didn't like it, but her mother didn't care. as soon as she entered, coda felt the familiar feeling of suffocation take over her body, but she said nothing. she didn't know what to say, nor how to really say anything at all.

her mother along with a strange woman with short black hair and a sickly-sweet smile plastered to her face led coda into a room where a stocky man sat in a burgundy chair, a bushy mustache settled on his upper lip and a glint in his eyes that frightened coda to her core. the man attempted to ask coda multiple questions about her home life and her relationships, both with other children and her family. predictably, the small girl gave no answer. the man grunted deeply in frustration and met coda's mother's eyes. both of them had a knowing look in their eyes, and coda surely noticed, but she didn't understand at the time.

after that, her family started to treat her differently. now she was no longer the family jewel- in fact, it seemed that she was nothing to them at all. and for the most part, coda didn't mind. she was far too wrapped up in her experiments and thoughts to care what they thought during her youth.

but as she grew, she found that her opinion on others' thoughts of her began to change.

in kindergarten on the playground coda often caught other children's suspicious and disgusted eyes. she still didn't understand what those gazes said, but soon she would. far too soon.

in the first grade the names began to slip past their lips. "freak!" "weirdo..." "stupid!" and though coda had never understood the meaning behind other people's words, she was smart enough to know that whatever they meant, it couldn't be good. soon enough she completely withdrew from not only her peers, but from her family members. she spent recesses in her music classroom, messing with pianos and xylophones while her ignorant teacher listened to music in his earbuds, completely careless of what she was doing. coda was perfectly fine with this though- she would much rather practice her scales and arpeggios rather than waste her breath and give herself a headache. and at home she locked herself away in her room and sang solfege scales to herself as high as she could go for hours on end until her throat ached so badly her mother swore she was going to lose her voice forever if she didn't stop. but no one could make her stop- coda was nothing if not determined.

by fourth grade coda had mastered piano and was beginning to play violin, which she would one day find was her favorite part of living. the name-calling did not cease, but she didn't really care. she would simply play loud enough to block them out every day without fail until her ears were worn and abused. she still didn't care.

coda spent her next few years attached to the piano like a tumor. wherever there was one she immediately jumped on it and no one could pull her away until she was satisfied. by eighth grade she knew the violin like the back of her hand and carried hers with her wherever she went. it was her comfort when everything became too much for her. it was her lifeline. her light in the darkness. she loved it like a child.

and this was what led to the first rift in her peaceful life.

she was in ninth grade outside of her orchestra classroom during lunch because there was a substitute today and for some reason she was convinced that coda should try to make friends. as if she knew coda in the slightest. but... whatever. it was fine.

coda carried her violin outside and found a secluded spot on the football field to play in. she had played two and a half pieces before three giant boys and their girlfriends stomped up to her.

"hey, what're you doing in our spot?" one of them boomed. coda just continued to play without stopping for even a second to spare him a glance or say a thing or two. she didn't care enough to, and either way she simply assumed he would leave her be if he understood that she didn't give a *. but he didn't leave. in fact, he moved closer to her and... *, he towered above her tiny 5'2'' self. she lifted her eyes from her playing but did not cease her movements, dark orbs meeting his anger-filled ones. coda swore she heard a few gasps from the others who were watching her play violin without her eyes on her instrument, but she was too focused on staring this tall moron down to care.

though she didn't look it from the outside, coda's heart was pounding out of her chest and her throat was completely dry. she was utterly terrified of the male before her, but she maintained her glare at him with all of the will in her mind. she was nothing if not determined. but soon she would have no more will left.

it all happened so fast that she wasn't sure what to think when the male stepped even nearer to her and aimed a punch to her face. all of the air was knocked out of her body in that instant and she dropped her violin, falling backwards. she went entirely deaf and blind for a good minute or two, completely unaware of the screams from the girls nearby and the desperate attempts of the other boys to stop their friend from killing poor coda. a merciless kick to her right side and multiple stomps down onto her stomach struck her in the next few seconds, causing blood to fly from coda's mouth and land in the green grass around her. she rolled over onto her side, arm raising to wrap around her gut as she began to sob aloud. the girls rushed to her side, attempting to lift her up and get her to the nurse's office, but coda screamed in protest when she felt their hands on her and they automatically pulled away.

but the worst was yet to come.

coda's senses were still completely lost when the furious boy began to trample her violin, tearing apart the wood with his cleats until it was beyond recognition and repair. he then lifted her bow and snapped it in half, throwing both pieces at the girl curled up on the grass. only then did the others finally manage to subdue him and drag him away.

coda 'awoke' a few minutes later, her vision hazy and her face sticky with red liquid. all around her other students stood as well as the recess monitor, whispering among one another with concern in their voices. the monitor was crouched down before her, trying to awaken her. his hand was on her shoulder in an attempt to be comforting, but it only made coda want to scream. and she sure as hell would have if she wasn't choking on her own blood.

coda, instead of taking the monitor's outstretched hand, rolled over to see her violin absolutely wrecked to oblivion behind her. only then did she attempt to sit up, though her efforts were in vain. she was far too weak to move in the slightest. but what she did manage was to start weeping. her lifeline was gone. her peace was gone. her happiness was gone. all torn apart on the grass, ripped out of her hands.

and that was the first time she had ever cried in front of any other human being.

after that, she became even more distant than before. she spoke even less to her family, didn't show up to school three out of five days of the week, and didn't even dare to touch a piano or, least of all, a violin. coda was now afraid of becoming attached because now she understood just how easy it was for something she loved to be taken away from her. her family scolded and yelled at her, trying to convince her to go back to school, but she couldn't bring herself to care. still, she listened to every single word they screamed into her ears, unable to block them out like she had before. she had no protection, not anymore. all was lost.

from then on, coda fell into a daze. she drifted through life like an empty ghost, completely careless about whether she'd get hurt or not. she simply... existed. this went on for multiple years. eventually her family gave up on trying to save her. coda began to count the days until the end would come.

and then when she was nineteen something changed.

coda was out walking the seoul streets, tea in hand, when she bumped into someone. she stumbled backward and the other laughed a handsome laugh. she looked up and there he was in all his glory- his jet-black hair was beautifully messy and in between his lips was a cigarette. his jawline was sharp enough to cut flesh and his aura was strong enough to make coda physically sway as if she was obeying his every whim- and to be totally honest, those soft, dark eyes were enough to do it.

his name was dean.

coda, like with the piano, became immediately drawn to this boy. she wasn't sure why, but everything about him attracted her like metal to a magnet- his face, his voice, his sense of humor, his scent. the way his leather jacket clung to his skin and fell off her shoulders when she stole it from him was everything she ever wanted. he would yell at her jokingly and she would zip it up just to make her point evident to him. he'd leave her be with a playful chuckle and a roll of the eyes. she would walk onward, wrapped up in the smell of him and completely one hundred percent satisfied for the first time in years. he would follow with a fond grin on his handsome face.

dean was the sweetest boy coda had ever met. he understood her better than absolutely anyone- he never made her touch him, and when he touched her himself, he was careful to ask first. when she said no the first few times, he nodded understandingly and they moved on with their lives. however, later on she began allowing him to, and he gleefully did. it began with simple shoulder touches and arms around her waist and eventually became coda's first kiss. it was on a hill overlooking han river when the fireflies were buzzing about around them.

"is this okay?" dean had asked, reaching for her hand. coda hummed in response. dean interlocked his fingers in hers and then leaned closer to her until their faces were centimeters apart.

"is this okay?" he repeated, breath warm against his girlfriend's lips. coda's breath hitched in her throat and somehow, like her mind knew something she didn't, she replied: "y-yeah."

dean moved closer and pressed his full lips against hers in one magic moment that sent a spark through coda's body so hot that she swore it would turn her to ash, but for once she didn't mind. in fact, a part of her wanted it to. she wanted her entire body to be consumed by the passion she felt- something she hadn't experienced in years. it was... it was a freeing feeling, really. better than anything in the entire world. it... it made her happy.

and coda shared many more magic, electric moments with her boyfriend for the next year and a half. however, after this 17 months, the magic suddenly disappeared. she didn't know why, but she was desperate to know. she wanted it back. she was still happy with dean. she still felt that passion she had two years ago. why had dean's suddenly faded?

she didn't ask him for another five months.

when she did, she was sat upon that same hill where the first magic moment occurred, phone held up to her ear in a shaking hand. her voice was soft and it was trembling, as it always did. she inquired, "b-babe... dean? do... do you still l-love me?" as the words slipped off her tongue her heart clenched in her chest with worry. dean gave no reply for a few long, draining seconds. as the time passed coda felt her heart sink deeper and deeper into her gut until she wasn't sure it was still beating.

but finally he said: "of course, co. of... of course."

coda did her best to convince herself he wasn't lying.

one more month had passed when coda found herself in a pic-quick all by herself, bag hanging off her shoulder. her phone vibrated in her pocket and she paused her mindless walking around the shop to pull it out.

incoming call from babe

usually upon reading this coda would have smiled affectionately and answered without an ounce of hesitance, but now it was different. she paused for a few seconds before finally working up the courage to swipe to the right and answer the call. she didn't even attempt to put on her sweet 'good girlfriend' voice, instead replying with a blunt tone. she sounded like a robot. "yeah?"

dean didn't respond for a few moments. "uh... hey, coda."

immediately a pang was sent to coda's heart. he never called her by her full name. this was wrong. something wasn't right here.

she opened her mouth to ask if he was alright, but he began before her. "look, coda. i... i love you. i really do. but for some reason i just... i don't feel it anymore. you don't either, right? that's okay. things like this happen. not much we can do."

no. no. this... this wasn't right. this was wrong. she did love him. she did.

"d-dean... i do. i do. i l-love you. i love you." she croaked, tears rising in her eyes.

dean fell silent again. "no you don't. coda, you can't." coda opened her mouth to protest, but she couldn't speak. she felt like all the breath had been ripped from her body with the same force of being punched in the face. perhaps it was even worse. she had no words to describe the feeling of being crushed by an invisible stone dropped into her chest like a pebble into a pond, dragging her down into the murky depths.

the tears faded from her eyes. she had nothing left. she wasn't sure she could feel anything anymore. she had gone fully numb.

however, dean continued. "coda i'm sorry. i'm sorry, really i am. but this... what we have... us... it needs to end. i can't do it anymore. i'm sorry." coda didn't understand how he could be this blind. couldn't he see that she was hurt? couldn't he see how much she loved him? could he see anything at all? could she? she couldn't even be sure anymore.

the call ended with two simple words that tore coda apart from the inside out. burned her up. consumed her. destroyed her.

"goodbye coda."

coda reminded herself that this is what she had wanted. she had wanted him to engulf her. she got her wish. she should be thankful. this was what she wanted.

coda stepped out of the store in a haze, phone returned to its home in her pocket. she paused beside her car, staring out at the city before her, feeling like she was dead. however, she was wrong; her heart was still beating. blood still pumped through her veins. her lungs still inhaled and exhaled the musty air of seoul. she was alive, technically. but her mind? it was long gone. it had died months ago, she just didn't notice.

perhaps she had been the blind one after all.

coda got into her car and drove. drove until she found that spot where that first magic moment with dean had started it all. the place where she had asked the gods to let him burn her alive. she cursed her own wish. she cursed everything that had ever gotten her to this point- cursed her damn violin, cursed the one that had destroyed it, cursed the sole person that made her believe she was worth something. cursed herself for letting her become just like all the other stupid, stupid people in this world.

she pulled her phone from her pocket and sent one last message to dean before she stepped out onto the hill that overlooked han river. she pondered the hilarity of the fact that she had ended up back here again, as she always did. she couldn't escape him. coda let out a bitter laugh. she stared out into the open waters one last time and reached her hand up to wipe away the tears covering her face that she hadn't even realized she had shed until now.

then she threw her phone aside and jumped into the water.

somewhere in seoul, a phone buzzed. a message was received. the message was opened. it read:

"희미해지는 color
나 홀로 이 어둠 속을 걸어
그토록 선명했던 우리 추억들은 이제
희미한 흑백처럼"

two days later, coda's body was found washed up somewhere far from her home. her body was identified and a funeral was held. her family prayed for her. if coda was still around, she would have laughed.

and then, a few years later, or maybe a thousand, coda's eyes opened once again. but now things were much, much different.

so different, in fact, that she was now a kitsune. and a pretty one at that- her fur was a shimmering silver color and her eyes dark and void-like in all their endless wonder. in her first moments she rolled over onto her side and yawned loudly, but the yawn was so melodic that her parents believed she warranted a musical-themed name. and thus she was donned 'coda,' a term in music meaning a specific section of music used to bring a piece to an end. as coda grew older, she would find the meaning of her name very ironic.

but at this time, she was but a kit. she spent her days much like she did in her past life, wandering the expansive jungles by herself with a small notebook where she drew bugs and plants and mammals in immense detail, mapping out all their bodily systems and their functions using telekinesis to hold the pen. because, believe it or not, it was extremely difficult to write with paws.

in this life, however, more contrasts were yet to come.

coda had four siblings- valkyrie, stan, sera, and her favorite, eunju. she found very soon that she liked these siblings much more than the ones she had had before. i mean, generally, she didn't like people, but at least these ones didn't try to touch her constantly. in fact, they were quite respectful of her space. besides her parents who acted concerned as any parents would, they didn't question her much. coda was just a part of the family. just another strange wolfgang child with too many thoughts running around in her head and an incomprehensible intelligence to match. almost like she knew things she shouldn't... hm... wonder why.

anyways, coda grew to like her siblings, but one in particular: eunju. in the first few months of her life, she noticed that he tended to be just as quiet as she, and despite her better judgement and her normal behavioral patterns, this attracted her to him. by four months, she was doing her best to spend time with him at any time he allowed, and this developed into a tight-knit bond between the brother and sister. there was something off about both of them, and that was what made them fit together like two puzzle pieces.

after this, thanks to eun, coda began to grow closer to her other siblings. she would smile with them, even laugh at some points. and for once she actually felt like a part of something. she wasn't a charity object. she was a sister. a friend. she was loved, whatever that meant. it was... amazing, really. not that she would or could really tell them. but that was alright. she was sure they could tell by themselves. they weren't idiots. they were wolfgangs.

but being a wolfgang, in many cases, wasn't a good thing. see, it was almost like, since birth, the world was against the wolfgang children, coda included. at three months, their mother disappeared. coda could remember well seeing her siblings cry, missing their mother more than anything else in the entire world. but, being coda, she was pretty much indifferent. and if even in the deep depths of her mind she missed vivianne (which, *, she did), she would block it out through exploration and writing. she wouldn't let herself be affected. wouldn't let her emotions get the better of her. she was smarter than that. and either way, it wasn't like empathy was something that came easy to coda- most things of that nature didn't. probably never would.

then news came of their niece's death, and coda came to memorize a name: bill cipher. she didn't know why her mind made the decision to remember it, but it did, and coda allowed it to (for whatever reason). coda grew to despise this name and its owner, though there were often days when she wondered exactly why. really, she never cared about things like this, so why did it affect her? she wasn't sure. it seemed her brain liked to pick and choose just what things mattered and what didn't. it just made her more strange than she already was.

things seemed to just get darker and darker for the family as the days passed- coda's siblings were harassed and pushed around almost endlessly. coda managed to evade most of the trauma due to her constant distance from the others, but she still faced the backlash of her siblings' suffering. she would see them cry, see them scream in frustration, see them break. a part of her found it fascinating to see them snap, and the rest of her wilted like a flower in the cold. she didn't want to see them hurt, but she didn't know how to make it better. so she kept her distance.

and then a new figure in her life appeared. co believes his name was calvarychoirs. he was almost like a father to her, although most days she would barely see him due to her frequent absence from family activities and the like. still, on occasion he would pass her caring smiles and loving looks across rooms. he wouldn't try to touch her. he knew better. and that only made coda appreciate him more.

plus, he made her siblings happy. that was enough for her. he was all they had left as a parent, and at this point the kids would appreciate would they could get. coda was thankful, really. he put in all this work to give them someone to rely on. to give them a father.

for a little while, with calvarychoirs and all her loving siblings, coda was... happy. somehow, she felt like it was worth living. and that was all she had wanted.

but, like all things, the pleasant times had to end eventually.

now, coda wasn't sure how it happened. it just... did.

it had started with just a single memory during a brief, rare moment of sleep. coda was completely dead to the world, lost in dreamland when she heard a feminine voice through the pure white fog. "you look beautiful, honey." coda had awoken immediately, glancing wildly around the room in search of the voice's source, but no one was there. her immediate assumption was that her mother had returned, and she was about to rush from her room to shout to her family, but obviously she had been wrong. this left a sour taste in her mouth, but she ignored it. instead she grabbed her notebook and took off into the jungle in an attempt to distract herself from the dream by measuring mushroom patch growths.

coda returned home to the temple late that night, having lost track of time. she headed straight for her room without saying a word to her family. they didn't seem to notice. she couldn't care less if they did or not. because she was absolutely terrified.

out in the woods she could have sworn she heard the voice from her dream following her through the trees.

"say hello to your auntie, sweetheart!"

"why don't you go talk to those kids, darling?"

"sweet dreams."

and then there was a scream. it echoed through the rainforest around her, or at least coda thought it did. it was shrill and full of horror and sent coda sprinting in the direction of her home. only when she had reached the jungle's edge did she let herself walk again. her lungs heaved and her throat was chilled like ice by the crisp winter air, but it didn't matter. what did matter was figuring out where the hell that voice came from.

for the next week coda couldn't sleep a wink, instead spending her time paranoid of the voice's return. she scrabbled notes into her notebook about the female figure she saw in the edges of her vision on occasion, or about the identical scream echoing in her room and in the temple and outside of it, too. it followed her wherever she went, and it was driving her insane. her family tried to help her, but there wasn't much they could do- it just kept coming back. it never ceased and only got worse over time. and as time passed, coda was only brought farther away from the answers she sought.

and to make things worse, at this time, coda's whole foundation was slipping out from beneath her paws. because at seven months, calvarychoirs left her and her siblings behind. he just... disappeared, and without a single trace. gone. lost. perhaps dead. coda felt a sense of betrayal and hurt in the pit of her gut upon finding one day that he was completely and utterly gone. her siblings searched for him, but he was never found. coda considered him dead. a part of her hoped so. he'd hurt her siblings, and thus he must pay.

finally at eight months, coda, fed up with the loss and pain she and her loved ones had been forced to endure, decided that if the answers weren't coming to her, she would go to them.

so in the dead of the night about a month after she first heard the voice in her dream, coda slipped out of her home and ventured out into the woods, both parts familiar and not.

and after weeks of searching, all she found at the end of the road was one thing.

a violin.

a violin sitting in its case, open for all the world to see. and though coda, in this life, had never laid eyes upon this particular instrument before, she was immediately attracted to it. she carried it with her and continued, knowing someway, somehow, that it was important to her.

coda walked for days and weeks and months on end, violin case floating beside her, held up with telekinesis. she did not stop for water or food until she could not walk any longer without sustenance, and when she finally stopped, it was only for a few brief minutes. time was of the essence, she had learned. she had no time to stop- she needed to find the voice. that was all that mattered now. if she could find it, she could be happy. she had convinced herself of this, and she wasn't going to doubt it now that she had come this far.

until she kinda sorta did.

see, it was during one of coda's curt breaks that she came to this realization: she could not recall the faces of her family. not eunju, not sera, not val, not stan, not even her own mother and father (though she supposed she could forgive herself for the last two). and as she wandered onward this began to drive her mad even more than the voice. somehow her worries had picked away at her end goal, eventually leaving only one thought: she needed to find them.

and thus, in an impulsive choice completely unlike her, coda turned around. the logical piece of her knew very well that she had gone too far to even imagine finding her home again, but that wasn't the point. she didn't need home, she just needed family.

for the most part, coda followed nothing but her gut and internal compass to track them down again. she wasn't even remotely sure this technique would bring her at all near to her family, but she was alright with that. she had nothing else to go on; no map, no guide, nothing. nothing but herself and her violin.

it took a good month until coda finally came across a giant set of stairs leading up to a floating island that, for some divine reason, screamed 'home' to her. it just seemed right, and either way, she had followed her heart all the way here. she had nothing to lose. not anymore. might as well as make a fool out of herself than see herself become a true fool if she kept walking any longer. and who knew? maybe her family was here. she could never tell.

so, coda stepped up onto the staircase, staring at her feet and out at the land below as she walked. she wasn't really fearful of falling. if she were to find her end here, she would accept it with open arms. she honestly didn't care anymore. dead or alive, so be it.

as she walked the steps, coda pondered what really did matter nowadays. she supposed her end goal mattered- the voice was still on her mind in those locked-away nooks and crannies she forgot about. it still whispered in her ears and traveled through her brain, carried by the wind. it haunted her like some unknown force, always with her, but only felt when she paid enough attention to it. thankfully because of this it was quite easy to simply distract herself from it- for now, she could keep her paranoia at bay long enough to see to it that she meet her second goal: find her family.

coda gave a solemn glance up the stairs. there were many to go still, but she didn't mind. she did mind, however, the possibility that maybe the ones she was looking for weren't up there. really, all possibilities were... well... possible. they could be here, and they could not. in the end, they could simply be nowhere- dead. gone. lost. and what would it matter? coda's subconscious answered this question with no hesitation: it wouldn't.

a shiver ran down the kitsune's spine, and she wasn't sure it came from the breeze. still, she refused to believe she was frightened by this possibility. the future wasn't scary- the past was. that was what she was running from. if she was running to somewhere safe, then the future must be safe, right? right.

soon enough (not really), coda had reached the end of the line, and she found herself staring out a wide field. she set her violin down at her feet and changed into her doe form. it was a form she had grown to prefer over time- much less attention-bringing. less flashy. less strange. coda took a seat, opening her mouth to shout. however, due to her dehydration, no sound came out. she supposed this was fine with her. it wasn't like she wanted to speak in the first place.

she reckoned she'd just have to wait.

so be it.

""
[ info page ]

SWEETOPHELIA. · Mar 10th 2017

[center][fancypost= width: 450px; text-align: justify;][size=11][font=timesnewroman]Sweetophelia approached when she noticed an unfamiliar figure sitting and waiting: a doe, accompanied by a fine violin case. It was not such a shocking sight, but it was unusual to see "prey" animals coming to join the clans, much less hoofed animals. They were simply less common - she could only recall ever meeting another deer in Westeros, a member of House Baratheon. The stag had been the sigil of the old noble House Baratheon, but after what events had come to pass with the Westerosi civil war, Sweetophelia had little fondness for Baratheons.

But obviously her distaste did not extend to regular deer with no affiliation to Westeros nor the old drama. In fact, Sweetophelia approached the Wolfgang with a smile, small but friendly. "Hey there," she spoke up, her dark ears flicking as she looked over at the other. Nothing too shocking yet. "This is BlizzardClan territory. Can I help you?"

The question and statement was formalities. It was apparent that Coda was at least somewhat aware that this was clan territory she was stumbling upon, and that she had most likely come with a purpose in mind. Nevertheless Sweetophelia found it appropriate to extend the old and familiar pleasantries. "I'm Sweetophelia Targaryen, by the way," the tall Ragdoll feline introduced herself, her dark, plume-like tail swaying softly in the breeze as she continued to watch the other female.

From a first glance, she never would have correctly guessed a single detail of Coda's tragic past - not her previous life as a human, her relentless bullying as a child, her first love and heartbreak leading to her suicide and untimely death, and her subsequent reincarnation into the Wolfgang family and the events that followed in her life. And it wasn't information that most animals were willing to volunteer freely.

OOC | that's some crazy muse there whoa
space

info — updated 3/9

IVYLEE XERSES · Mar 10th 2017

[center][fancypost=width: 450px; line-height: 120%; text-align: justify;][font='Georgia, serif']A violin case being carried up the stairs by a doe... this was an interesting sight to see, not one that was common, but that wasn't a bad thing. IN fact, it peeked Ivylee's interest, although that wasn't something too hard to achieve. The little canine was easily intrigued, always curious in the simplest things. So as she settled down to sit beside Sweetopehlia, she took a moment to give the leader a smile before turning her attention back to Coda, her bright gaze observing the violin case which the other female has possession of. Ivy was never really interested in music, other than listening to it, and so she wasn't too familiar with instruments. Honestly, she didn't know that it was a violin in there, but she knew it had to be some sort of instrument... of some kind.

Seeing a doe was not too unusual for the pooch. Many of them had joined RiverClan before, including some other herbivorous animals. She considered them to be just as decent of clanmates and friends as anyone else, however. What she couldn't help but wonder was if Coda was familiar with clans or not, though it seemed that she did have decent knowledge of them, yes. What could she possibly be here for? That was a question that lingered in the peppy samoyed's mind as she sat, patiently wagging her tail as she waited.

A new clanmate, maybe? Only time could tell.
[size=10]

tags ♡ 03/06

PIERCE P. · Mar 10th 2017

//track for tomorrow !!

coda wolfgang. · Mar 10th 2017

[fancypost=background-color:;border:0px;width:560px;text-align:justify;font-size:8pt]
if coda had been aware, she would've found the strangers' instant distaste towards her quite laughable. it was funny to her just how easily people judge others; not that she was any sort of pure, altruistic creature that never made unfair assumptions of other people. really, she had no right to judge them for judging her- it was just so funny. she honestly wasn't sure why, but if she had the physical ability to right at this moment, she would be crying in laughter... or maybe just crying. who knew at this point, really.

still, coda was dehydrated and pretty much unable to laugh or even talk whatsoever, so she instead listened to sweetophelia speak intently, dark coffee eyes scanning her up and down curiously. she really was pretty- her long fur was very elegant in appearance, and the color of her coat was cool-shaded and yet warm simultaneously. she seemed welcoming. motherly.

a part of coda automatically didn't trust her, all because of that last part. obviously this was rude to sweetophelia- she seemed kind enough. but coda had beef with mother-like figures. her true mother had left her and her family to die. how could she trust anyone like her?

coda shook off the thought. though if sweetophelia paid enough attention, she would notice a dark, bitter tinge appearing in the doe's dark orbs.

coda offered the female a firm, polite nod before she turned her head and conjured up a bottle of water. she removed the cap with telekinesis and quickly chugged some down, panting in a raspy, scratchy manner once she had finished. she managed to summon up her voice and give a weak response with her timid, trembling voice, though the result wasn't the most pleasant.

"h-hello, sweet, u-um, ophelia. i'm coda. wolfgang." inwardly, coda's heart dropped at just how pathetic she sounded. it had been a while since she'd spoken, so long in fact that she barely recognized her own voice as it lurched from her throat. she sounded dead. i mean, it was accurate, at least from a symbolic standpoint, but still... coda wasn't sure she wanted to be dead. or at least she didn't want others to be aware that perhaps she did.

either way, coda continued. "i would l-l-like to join." she bit her tongue at the loud stammer. coda opened her mouth to form some sort of apology, but it seemed her throat had given out on her once again. she took another sip of water and looked over the plastic bottle to see yet another stranger. this one was a canine- pure white with small portions of... neon blue? how... odd.

lowering her bottle to the ground beside her hooves, coda stepped slightly closer to her violin out of subconscious nervousness. she wasn't used to being stared at by multiple people at once. it had been a long time since this had happened- a very long time. it was sort of frightening, really. both parts just that she was being watched in general and the fact that she was even back in a situation of this sort at all. she hadn't expected to be back under the eyes of others as quickly as she had, and it was almost overwhelming for her.

coda glanced toward her violin. she bit her tongue even harder to keep herself grounded. she needed to control herself. she couldn't cave, not in front of these total strangers. she'd look like a moron, and god knows she was anything but. she wouldn't let herself be stupid. not again.

so instead coda just dipped her head toward the dog and did nothing more. minimal effort was required, and minimal effort was exerted. she was alright with this. for now.

// y eah woops. im sure it'll be gone soon lmao

""
[ info page ]

OLIVE · Mar 10th 2017

Olive knew Cavalrychoirs quite well, if indeed it had been the same one Coda loved. He had been a part of the Rift with her, was under Finnishwars's rule. He had been kind, but unfortunately, he had promoted kicking her out when she outright refused to raid a human village--she was a former human herself, after all, like Coda. She couldn't remember if he had been promoted to second-in-command instead of her, or if it was someone else. Even so, he seemed like a nice guy.

But a doe carrying a violin case? How odd. Agent Olive herself had vowed one New Year's to play violin. She never followed through on it though. She was more of a...singer. Now Oprah, Ms. O? She handled the piano, and hot diggity dog did she play it well. Her singing voice was awful though.

Now, the vixen blinked her round brown optics at the doe with the violin. Olive was always on anything odd, and this was no exception. If gadgets were allowed here she would have gotten out her Un-Violin-inator and zapped it in a heartbeat. But they didn't exist. They were in a place that, to her and only her, was forbidden to enter. If she had gone back down there it would have been the same as her committing suicide. But how could you, when you were immortal?

She pressed her large satellite-dish-like ear to the ground, hearing the faint laughter of agents all around her. She could hear a guy's voice...a guy she knew well. It was Otto, trash-talking her, naturally. Why was he so obsessed with her? She was gone, he was there, why did he feel the need to brag and boast when he already played the game and won?

Sighing, she lifted her head up and gazed at the ground. She didn't care anymore. Though she still carried the Odd Squad badge as a sort of...tribute to the supposed year--six years?--she had been there, she was ready to put the Odd Squad life behind. Today, she vowed, once she got done greeting this stranger, she would start a fire and burn everything of Otto's she had kept. Every bit of it. Their photos, their handwritten works...all of it, burned in a fiery pit resembling hell. Because that's where that half-assed Mr. O should go. Hell.

That's just the way it was.

The doe spoke then. Her name was Coda. She was here to join. Go figure. "Greetings, my name is Agent Olive. Nice violin." She nodded to the violin case. Her tone held friendliness, but it was laced with anger. Not at Coda, of course, because Coda was not a threat. She wouldn't start attacking people and murdering them with lethal pies or betray them and give them concussions during heated moments that got a little too heated.

TAGS

SWEETOPHELIA. · Mar 11th 2017

[center][fancypost= width: 450px; text-align: justify;][size=11][font=timesnewroman]Sweetophelia's distaste only extended towards Baratheons - regular deer with no affiliation hardly stirred any contention in her. Her facial features remained unchanged, her pale lilac eyes curious as she looked over the other female. Sweetophelia observed her, noting the polite but stiff way the doe carried herself. But that couldn't be scrutinised. Not everyone could be genuinely warm or friendly - it was impossible to know the true extent of another animal's thoughts, feelings, or experiences.

Her brow lifted as she watched Coda summon a plastic bottle of water, gulping the liquid down vigourously. Had she travelled far to find them? The BlizzardClan leader listened intently as the other spoke, her voice coming out rough and awkward. The member of the Wolfgang family didn't seemed to be much accustomed to speaking. She wondered if Coda had been living alone for a long time. Sweetophelia had gone through a similar period of isolationism before, and it had been painful - being alone and separated from the animals that had cared for you, valued you.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Coda Wolfgang," she echoed the other's name so that it might more easily and quickly be imprinted in her memory. She ignored her stutter, her pale gaze instead shifting to Ivylee and Agent Olive as the pair approached soon after. "You're more than welcome to join us, Coda." Her slight smile broadened. "Would you like to see our camp now? We could help you get settled in."
space

info — updated 3/9

PIERCE P. · Mar 11th 2017

[center][fancypost= bgcolor= opacity: 0.5; borderwidth=0px; width: 450px;][font=times new roman][align=justify]Pierce knew what it was like to be nervous around people, especially when there were a lot of them and their attention was all on you. It was difficult sometimes, but he had begun to get better with crowds. This did not to seem to be the case for Coda, judging by her few words and slight stutter. Who knew, though? He had developed a stutter from a scarring experience - maybe it was similar for the doe. Or there was the possibility it was simply a speech impairment she was born with. Either way, he would ignore it.

The young tom approached soon after Agent Olive, observing the Wolfgang with a small, somewhat absent smile as he silently listened to her words. Coda Wolfgang - got it. He cocked his head a moment after hearing the name, however. Another Wolfgang? Was it possible that it was just a coincidence that so many of these joiners shared surnames? It seemed likelier that they were related. He watched the deer curiously, tail flicking slowly, before meowing, "Pleasure to meet you, C-Coda. My name's Pierce, I'm the vice-leader here. Let me know if you need anything." His gaze drifted to the violin that Coda was standing so close to, and he stared at it for a few seconds. A musician? He'd met people with many different hobbies, ranging from athletes to artists, but never had he met a musician. He supposed music was a form of art, though. Pierce quite liked music, although he couldn't use any instruments. Listening to music was just fine for him.

"I like your v-violin. Do you play a lot?" In his experience, talking a lot to someone awkward would either immensely help or make them worse. For him, he loved to talk, but he just... wasn't very good at it. If this girl didn't feel like speaking much, he could understand. The serval had been a rather antisocial child, after all.

//welcome to blizzardclan!

tags :: updated 3/09

IVYLEE XERSES · Mar 12th 2017

[center][fancypost=width: 450px; line-height: 120%; text-align: justify;][font='Georgia, serif']Wolfgang.

The surname was familiar to Ivylee, yes, and she could remember the memories that came with it rather easily. Sera Wolfgang was the first thing that came to her mind - someone whom had once tried joining RiverClan while also being apart of the Cartel, but of course, that didn't go over so well. Ivy didn't have anything against the name or what it meant to her though, it was just something that was familiar to her. She hadn't recalled meeting other Wolfgangs except for Sera, until now. Coda Wolfgang. She'd have to remember that.

Ivy glanced up at the doe, offering her a reassuring smile. It seemed like something that she needed, based off the nervousness in her tone. Ivylee wasn't usually one to intimidate anyone nor be intimidated, so to see something like this occur was something she couldn't relate to, but she could still empathize. She didn't make a comment on the stuttering or anything, but instead continued to smile, glancing at her clanmates for only a moment, her blue gaze soon returning to Coda.

"Welcome to BlizzardClan, Coda! I'm Ivylee Xerses, a trainee here!" The small canine squeaked, giving a little bounce on her blue paws. She then tilted her head as she heard Pierce say something about a violin. So that's what must be in the case! It was an instrument, as she had assumed, and that made her tail wag, happy to have gotten that correctly.
[size=10]

tags ♡ 03/06

coda wolfgang. · Mar 12th 2017

[fancypost=background-color:;border:0px;width:560px;text-align:justify;font-size:8pt]
coda immediately turned her gaze to the first new stranger- olive. by the time she had spared the fox a glance, the other female had her ear pressed against the ground and coda couldn't help but be confused. however, there was no judgement on her face or in her mind- nothing but slight bewilderment. coda was still staring when olive lifted her head and she speedily turned away to face sweetophelia who appeared to have her eyes on the bottle coda held in the air, one eyebrow quirked. coda self-consciously lowered the bottle to the ground at her paws and offered the other girl an awkward smile in an attempt to hide her shy behavior, but it obviously didn't work very well.

coda visibly shrunk away from the three when a fourth approached; a serval. she stepped slightly backward, fur completely flat to appear slightly smaller. her heel hung off the edge of the floating island. the girl didn't bother to look over her shoulder at the ground below like most people would- she was already well aware that there was nothing but thousands of feet of pure air and then the cruel, cruel ground over there. there was nothing to look at but death behind her. and it wasn't like she was afraid of death.

what coda was afraid of, however, was right in front of her. coda dragged her dark coffee eyes over the quartet spread out at her feet and her heart dropped even deeper into her chest. she hated people. a few of them met her gaze and a shudder ran down her spine that she wondered if they could see or not. probably not... she hoped that was the case.

coda again faced olive, listening to her speak. she didn't look down at her violin until the other fem had finished, as was polite, and when she did, she nodded thankfully towards the fox. she didn't bother to gather her words, as she knew that either way they would likely die on her tongue before they saw the light of day, as they most often did. it was better not to waste her breath if it was going to fade anyways. (nothing mattered.)

very soon after the first had spoken, sweetophelia began, and coda used all her will not to groan. she turned to face the pretty fem and listened with a fake serene look upon her face. coda appreciated the girl's warm welcome, but the smarter part of her knew that there was a high likelihood that this girl was not to be trusted. in fact, none of them were, really. but that didn't stop coda- poor, poor, polite coda- from responding in her weak, quaking voice.

"um... thank y-you. and yes, in just a minute, b-but i still need some, u-uh, rest time. f-for my legs." she explained, passing ophelia a light but somewhat forced smile. she hoped the other fem understood- those stairs were incredibly trying for any person, though specifically coda, being as weak and malnourished as she was at the moment.

then pierce spoke up, voice slightly shaky. a friendly familiarity cascaded over coda and she was honestly reassured to know that there were other people somewhat like her. i mean, yes, she understood that all possibilities were possible, and there were probably many many people out there with a stutter, but... still. to have a tangible example right before her eyes was nice. really, really nice.

coda had opened her mouth to reply, a new twinkle in her eye, when pierce continued. she promptly snapped it shut with a sounding clack of teeth. she cringed inwardly at the sound but it quickly morphed into a joy at the inquiry about her violin. she was always happy to talk about her violin- she loved it a lot. more than anything. or... well... almost anything.

"uh, yes. very. very o-often." coda answered, words hasty but nonetheless laced with a kinda-sorta excited tone. to clarify: she loved talking about her violin, but only to people she trusted. and this pierce guy? coda hardly knew him. not much to go off there.

again, coda was given no break as ivylee spoke up, bark full to the brim to vibrance and life. coda wasn't sure if anyone could tell why, but she definitely soured a bit in posture because of ivy's vivacity, shrinking back even more. her lips curved very slightly downward out of habit. however, she quickly realized this and contorted her lips back into their average thin and firmly-pressed-together form.

coda simply offered the canine a nod of acknowledgement before turning back to sweetophelia. internally, she was aware of how rude that was of her, but she just bit her lip to keep from apologizing or, for that matter, saying anything else. and as she had predicted, the words died on her tongue once again. as they always did.

// thank you, im happy to be here !! ic opinions only btw

""
[ info page ]

OLIVE · Mar 12th 2017

She decided to take it a bit further. "Would you like a tour of the island, perhaps? I could use the chance to stretch my legs." Her tone was friendlier now, but she still gave a small growl at the ground. Most would think she was sick in the head, but if they knew what Olive's old partner had done to her, from the sheer indecency of accusing her of something she didn't making him look stupid all the way up to...oh, what had he called it? "Exile"? "See you later, Exile. Or should I say, NEVER AGAIN?!" When she was supposedly too slow, doing the shame-walk all the way to the tunnels, Otto kicked and shoved her like she was still his slave, calling her names, even her old nickname, "Scribbles". Eventually she was left with bruises on the outside and a broken heart on the inside. Since then she had never trusted anyone except her ThunderClan fam, who cared for her like she was a member too. Why she would now was anyone's guess.

But this girl...seemed harmless. Like a lady friend Olive could just spill and vent to without worry. No person can survive without friends, that much was proven. And though the vixen was immortal, she still wanted friends. Like Otto, but one that's not an asshole. Like Coda. A small smile tugged at the Trainee's lips, and she tilted her head curiously.