[fancypost bgcolor= transparent; bordercolor= transparent; borderwidth= 0px; font-family: bookman oldstyle; font-style: italics; font-size: 14px; letter-spacing: 8px; text-align: center; color: white; margin-top: -20px; text-shadow: 3px 3px 3px black; cursor: url("https://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqs4osv61Z1qfoi4t.png"), auto;]voxel st. claire ![/fancypost]
[fancypost bgcolor=transparent; border: 0px solid transparent; font-family: bookman oldstyle; font-size: 7pt; text-align: justify; width: 400px; text-transform: lowercase; cursor: url("https://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqs4osv61Z1qfoi4t.png"), auto;]
"sabine, we don't have time for this! i'd like to get back home as soon as possible! get back here!" this is what i get for buying her that damned ice cream. with a roll of her eyes, the brunette had frustration written all over her face, although there was a hint of amusement in her mocha brown eyes as she ran after the little girl. she caught sight of the looks other women in the store were giving her: annoyance... amusement... surprise. most of the people in this store had watched her grow up, had known her since she was in diapers. none of them had expected her to keep the little girl, herself included, but there was no way the twenty-four year old could have given her up when she looked up at her with those wide bambi eyes and that toothless grin. laughter escaped her as she caught up with the energetic little girl, scooping her up into her arms and spinning her around, relishing in the musical laughter that spilled from her daughter's lips.
"mommy!" sabine squeal, squirming in her mother's grip.
"put me down! i'll stop running, i promise." the young woman could do no more than laugh as her daughter looked up at her, eyes wide and shining.
that's when her breath caught in her throat. everything about her daughter reminded her of herself... everything but they eyes. they were as captivating as her father's had been, pulling one in without that person ever knowing it was happening. she must have been gazing at her daughter with a sorrowful expression on her face - thinking of sabine's father did that to her - because the little girl gave her a quizzical look, tilting her head and reaching out with one hand, placing it on her mother's right cheek.
"what's wrong?" she was so innocent in what her appearance did to her mother, had no idea how much it hurt to be reminded of the man she loved but couldn't have. forcing a smile for her daughter's benefit, she bent her head down and pecked her daughter on the forehead before setting her down and grabbing for her hand, leading her daughter back to the buggy full of groceries they had left behind.
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"you said you wouldn't run again... c'mon!" the brunette hollered, frustrated that her daughter refused to be at least the tiniest bit obedient. she released a huff as she made it to her car, digging her keys from her back pocket and making her way to the driver's side of the car, unlocking the door and leaning over the seat to insert the key into the ignition. she started up the car, watching as sabine hopped in the back seat and buckled herself up. her mother gave her a stern look, a look that said "don't touch anything," before popping the trunk open and heading around the back of the car, loading the groceries into the trunk. she lifted her head for the briefest of moments, catching sight of a woman that looked like an older version of herself.
"voxel!" the woman exclaimed, pulling her daughter into a hug before she even had the chance to respond. the brunette's entire posture shifted from relaxed to stiff in a matter of seconds - her mother tended to do that to her. "hey, ma," she chuckled, pulling away from her mother and lifting a brow, as if asking her if she were going to help load the groceries into the car.
there was silence between the two women as they loaded the car. as calla set the last bag in and slammed the trunk shut, her mother spoke. "freya misses you." voxel merely lifted a brow at her mother's words, leaning against the back of her car. "really? and she couldn't tell me this herself?" her mother gave her an exasperated look, as though calla should know the exact reason why her better half wasn't telling her this face to face. "you haven't been answering her calls, voxel."
oh, yeah, that's right.
"why affiliate with someone who made it abundantly clear that they wanted nothing more to do with me because of who i chose - choose - to love?"
"voxel, you know that's not why she was so upset. don't -"
"don't what, ma? push her away? exclude her from my life? that's what she did to me, so why am i the only one getting a lecture?"
"i'm not lecturing you, voxel, i'm just trying to help. if you just apologized..." the brunette nearly choked, eyes wide at her mother's words. apologized!?
"for what!? i've done nothing wrong!"
"you kept her."
now they were getting somewhere. the brunette's mocha eyes eyes darkened to the deepest shade of brown, nearing black, her mother had ever seen, an animalistic snarl bubbling its through her lips as she glared at her mother.
"are you telling me i'm wrong because i kept my daughter? i'm in the wrong because her father made one mistake?"
"a mistake that cost your sister's boyfriend - your best friend - his life. don't you regret any of that?" voxel had to take a deep breath, had to force away all of the anger and betrayal rising inside of her.
"the only thing i regret is being born to a simple-minded person such as yourself." turning her back on her mother, she strode over to the driver's side of the car and hopped inside, slamming the car door shut behind her. she looked in her rear view mirror at sabine, who was securely buckled in and looking down at her hands, and shifted her gaze towards her mother, who seemed to be hurt at her daughter's words.
good.
without a second glance at her mother, who had begun to walk away from voxel's car, she pulled out her parking spot and sped out of the parking lot, silence enveloping the vehicle as she drove home.
________
voxel collapsed onto her queen sized bed with a groan of frustration, burying her face in her pillow. her mother's words had stung not only herself, but sabine as well. the little girl had broken down in tears after helping her mother put up the groceries, blubbering that her grandmother and auntie hated her. it took a good twenty minutes for voxel to convince the heart-broken child that this was not the case and she hated her family for making her daughter feel that way. somewhere, deep down, calla had always known her mother resented her for keeping sabine. had always resented sabine for being the product of her mother's greatest disappointment (herself) and her worst nightmare (a.k.a. sabine's father).
but she'd hoped, somewhere down the line, that they would come to terms with her decision and love sabine like she should be loved. i was a fool to wish for anything more than what i got when sabine was born. which had been absolutely nothing, mind you. no help, no questions on how she was faring, nothing.
the mere thought of family spats made her head pound and with a groan of pain, she rolled onto her back and looked up at the ceiling, closing her eyes and wishing it to go away. knocking from the front door peaked her interest. who was at the door? her sister, faye? or was it her mother, coming to beg her forgiveness? both should do that, really, but neither would be forgiven.
"i got it!" sabine yelled from the living room, causing her mother to leap to her feet.
"don't you dare, sabine!" she yelled back, making her way to the front door a bit too late as sabine swung it open, smiling up at the man who stood in front of her. sweet motherf.cking hell...[/fancypost]