[align=center][img height=180 width=155]http://40.media.tumblr.com/a2c…ssvyAgns1uqlfhoo1_500.jpg[/img] [img height=180 width=155]http://41.media.tumblr.com/tum…nnweH6bf1qmn8b3o1_500.jpg[/img] [img height=180 width=155]http://estaticos.elmundo.es/as…/02/04/13915283736891.jpg[/img]
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[fancypost borderwidth=0px; margin-top:-20px; text-shadow:3px 3px 3px black;][color=#A9D0F5][size=28pt]aster "hawke" rede[/fancypost]
[fancypost borderwidth=0px; margin-top:-23px; letter-spacing:2px;][align=center][font=arial][size=6pt][color=#000000][shadow=darkred,right][b]27 YEARS OLD - ANGER ISSUES - SCHIZOPHRENIA - MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES[/shadow][/fancypost]
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[justify][sub][color=black][font=georgia]sometimes, it might just be better to go fucking jail. I mean, I'm only in this place, helping these kids, because it's my own kind of rehab. I've been in their situation before -- doing whatever I could for money and blowing that money on whatever I could use to get away. Get away from everything. Get away from everyone. [i]fuck. I hated it all. The people and their feigned smiles. Their forced laughs. Their masks of easily-detectable lies.
A giant façade was all this was.
When I was ten, I was in a car crash that orphaned me. Not only did it kill my parents, but also physically and mentally scarred me. It fucked up my brain and made me hallucinate. It split my emotions into their own separate personalities. It just... Shit, it fucked me up something fierce. And now I couldn't change anything. Literally. It was almost like they removed a part of my brain that regulated change, because, seventeen-years later, I'm the the same.
My drug addiction started when I was ten. It started out as huffing gluesticks and sharpies. Then it became stealing cigarettes from my foster parents. Then it was stealing liquor from the liquor cabinet. Then it was stealing weed from the high schoolers. Then it was stealing money to buy crack. Then it was selling my body for meth and heroin. Then it was risking my life to get lsd and acid and ecstasy.
I became incredibly violent. I lashed out at anyone and everyone. I went from being the smartest ten year old, to being an object that nobody wanted to go near. From the age of ten, to when I was eighteen, I had been through nearly one hundred different foster families. They all thought they could handle me. They couldn't handle shit.
I've done my fair share of jail time. Gone to my fair share of rehab places. Nothing seems to work. I couldn't even do probation correctly because I would end up wandering off and doing something else. So, as an alternative, the judges did something a little different in my case.
In the summertime -- from June until September -- I was sitting in jail. From the end of September to the beginning of June, I was in a rehab place, trying to help the other people there. It was like a job. I even got paid for it. So, while school was in session for all the kids who went to college and highschool and everything below that, I was stuck helping skinny, twitchy, whiny teenagers. Sometimes I got people my age, but it wasn't very often.
Right now, I was in the back of a police cruiser. I don't understand why they flipped their shit. I mean, the guy hit me first. He started the fight, and I made damn sure I ended it. Was he dead? Maybe. Probably not. I hope not. I don't want to go to jail for murder, in top of everything else I've done.
I was escorted out of the car and into the rehabilitation center. Oh great, the group circle was just getting started. Mrs. Hart, the lead person and owner of the center, was explaining the rules if a game they were playing. If you tell something about you that no one else knows, and cooperate, you get a piece of candy! of course, since most of the people were teenagers, they immediately were drawn in to the lure of sweets and false competition.
The police unlocked my handcuffs and waddled away. Just like every time I come into this room, I took my seat across from Mrs. Hart. There seemed to be one guy who looked like he was above eighteen, which was good. Mrs. Hart smiled at me and threw a tootsie roll at me. I watched it land in my crotch before I picked it up and unwrapped it, popping it in my mouth and staring at the wrapper.
Mrs. Hart pointed to the man who looked to be somewhat near my age. "Okay, your turn!"
(( eyy guess who sucks at starting posts oops
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[size=6pt]★ trek