WANNA SCREAM OUT LOUD / self harming + breakdown / open

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    [fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 500px; text-align: center; font-family: arial; letter-spacing: -2px; text-shadow: 1px 1px 1px black; color: mistyrose; font-size: 22pt; color: #FEF1B5][i]walking through this dreadful maze called life
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    [fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 490px; height: auto; font: normal 8pt verdana; text-align: justify; margin-top: -15px; line-height: 13px]Alone, thats what she, well he, was. Litchandelier had been trapped in the body of a dam*ed male, and it had been dreadful for him. And the thing was, he had nobody to go to or talk with, to calm him down. Sure he missed his old body as a dragon but that wouldn't have changed the emptiness he felt inside. He tried to shake the feeling off but it just kept crawling back to him. The panther couldn't stand to look at everyone else being oh so happy and with so many loved ones, yet he was always by himself, distant and silent. The male sat on his bathroom floor, toying with a dagger in his paws as he stared at it.


    Litchandelier held a high role in The Mafia, but that didn't mean anything. He wasn't expecting anyone to look up to him, why would they anyways? He wasn't ever that important. Family. That was the word used for all the members of The Mafia but in reality, they weren't, or he never really felt apart of it. He never was close with them, and probably would never be. The feeling of having nobody was tearing him up on the inside, yet he just stood straight and pretended like he was fine when he wasn't. But nobody would've cared even if they knew, they would just resume life like normal, as if nothing was wrong.


    By a fortune he received today, he was told that he would find love if he was more open, or something like that. But that sh*t probably wasn't even true, it was interesting to hear but he would never find love. It was a pointless thing that would waste his time, he didn't need it, like he didn't need anyone. But Litchandelier tried so hard to think that, only to find himself in disappointment.


    Why did he feel this way in the first place? He had tried to be more 'open' but excuse him for not being as hyped up and crazy as the others, and was that a sin? The male then positioned the dagger towards his wrist, and pierced through it, sliding the dagger downwards. Litchandelier flinched and groaned a bit at the pain, and stopped after a moment. He watched as the crimson liquid began to flow out of his cut wrist, but he thought that he deserved the pain. He was being selfish with these thoughts, wasn't he? No everyone was a nuisance, bothered him, he needed no friends. He deserved to be alone. But why did he feel so upset, why did he hurt on the inside? He needed somebody...just one person at least, somebody...


    The panther stood up with his still bleeding wrist and took the dagger and threw it towards his mirror. [b]"F*CK MY LIFE!" He yelled, at nobody but directing it towards himself, and he watched as the center of the mirror began to shatter into shards that fell as soon as the knife had collided. A tear ran down his eye, he was so unhappy. He was upset. He was alone. Litchandelier fell to the floor and put his head in his paws, ignoring the blood from his wrist staining parts like his ears. Somebody would likely have heard him but, he didn't care. He wasn't a crier but this time was an exception.
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    [color=powderblue][font=georgia][size=12px]ammy looked up to lit, and he probably wasn't the only one. her/his calm demeanour and cool-headedness was something he wished he possessed. after hearing the sound of glass smashing in the panther's room, the collie raced over and peeked through a crack in the door. the sight of blood on the floor and the sound of crying settled it: he was going in. [color=white]lit? are y-you okay? he asked softly, putting his head round the side of the door before walking in to sit beside the sobbing figure. he wasn't going so far as touching the feline just yet but he would if it was necessary. the poor guy....

    [fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 450px][align=right][size=25px][font=corbel][i]LEONA[/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=; border: none; width: 450px; font-family: corbel; font-size: 14px; text-align: justify; margin-top: -20px]Leona hadn't known loneliness. It had been her and Vespar for centuries, counting on and relying on each other. Perhaps she had gotten it in her mind that everyone had someone like Vespar? Perhaps Leona was part of this whole problem? She pushed the family idea, yet she couldn't deliver. How could she when she couldn't even have a real family of her own?


    Hearing Lit's scream and the all too familiar sound of shattering glass, the cream colored boss jumped to her paws and hastily made her way to his room. What she saw was enough to make her heart skip a beat. Her captain, a beloved member of The Mafia, was in tears on the floor with a bloody wrist. [b]"Litchandelier? Here, let me see your wound." Leona murmured calmly, snagging a nearby towel in her maw and awaiting his wrist so she could stop the bleeding. Then they could talk.

    [fancypost bgcolor=; border: 2px solid white; background:url(http://media.giphy.com/media/6r2FaUiC4VMFq/giphy.gif); width: 403px; height: 200px; overflow: hide][fancypost bgcolor= white; border: 0px solid white; width: 405px; height: 40px; opacity: 0.80;margin-left: -17px; margin-bottom: -5px][fancypost bgcolor= transparent; border: 0px solid white; font-family: georgia; font-size: 32px; margin-left: -60px; margin-bottom: -9px; letter-spacing: -2px; text-align: center; color: black]ASTRAROT F.C.H[/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor= transparent; border: 0px solid white; font-family: times new roman; font-size: 12px; margin-left: -60px; margin-bottom: -18px; letter-spacing: 0px; text-align: center; color: black]EVERY SCAR WILL BUILD MY THRONE![/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor= transparent; border: 0px solid white; font-family: candara; font-size: 9px; margin-left: -60px; margin-bottom: 0px; letter-spacing: 0px; text-align: center; color: black]BATTLE TAGS — [abbr=Conjuration; Bodies: Velociraptor-Dragon hybrid {main, intersex}]POWERS[/abbr] — INFORMATION — OTHER[/fancypost][/fancypost]


    [fancypost bgcolor= white; border: 0px solid white; width: 405px; height: 117px; opacity: 0.80;margin-left: -17px][fancypost bgcolor= white; border: 0px solid white; width: 400px; height: 108px; opacity: 1.00;margin-left: -11px; font-family: candara; text-align: justify; overflow:auto; font-size: 11px; line-height: 100%; color: black]"Fuck my life!"
    Oh, how those words sound familiar. Back when The Exiles was in a dictatorship, many Prisoners whom were demoted by Bill screamed this constantly. They didn't, however, and only accepted fate. They were upset or mad or depressed over it. They were pretty much born into the position. Granted, they were starved and dehydrated, but that wasn't their own doing. The chains that had been around their neck prevented them from doing anything; even talking hurt. Astrarot made their way over, a frown on their maw. As they saw what Lich did to himself, that frown got larger, if possible. Now that was new, to them at least. None of the Prisoners had done that to themselves, and it honestly confused the hybrid. Why would anyone want to cause harm to themself? The hybrid said, staring. "L-Lich?" Astrarot choked out, holding their wings close.
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    [size=7pt]© counselor dreamíe ; image credit to owners[/size]

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    [fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 490px; height: auto; font: normal 8pt verdana; text-align: justify; margin-top: -15px; line-height: 13px]Litchandelier didn't want anyone to find him, but they did anyways. He didn't want to be seen in this state but yet it was clear as day. He tried to calm himself down as to speak once he heard familiar voices, but kept his head laid down on his paws. After about a minute, the male wiped an eye with his right paw, the one that he never got to cutting in the first place, and slowly raised his head up. [b]"I-I'm fine..."     he muttered aloud, though wasn't quite sure whether they heard him or not. Litchandelier wiped a tear that threatened to run down his face before he slowly showed his bleeding wrist, as to what Leona told him to do. Great, now he made a scene, but he didn't dare to look at them, he lay still looking down at the floor, wishing they would leave so he could just cry to himself once more.


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    [fancypost bgcolor=; border: 2px solid white; background:url(http://media.giphy.com/media/6r2FaUiC4VMFq/giphy.gif); width: 403px; height: 200px; overflow: hide][fancypost bgcolor= white; border: 0px solid white; width: 405px; height: 40px; opacity: 0.80;margin-left: -17px; margin-bottom: -5px][fancypost bgcolor= transparent; border: 0px solid white; font-family: georgia; font-size: 32px; margin-left: -60px; margin-bottom: -9px; letter-spacing: -2px; text-align: center; color: black]ASTRAROT F.C.H[/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor= transparent; border: 0px solid white; font-family: times new roman; font-size: 12px; margin-left: -60px; margin-bottom: -18px; letter-spacing: 0px; text-align: center; color: black]EVERY SCAR WILL BUILD MY THRONE![/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor= transparent; border: 0px solid white; font-family: candara; font-size: 9px; margin-left: -60px; margin-bottom: 0px; letter-spacing: 0px; text-align: center; color: black]BATTLE TAGS — [abbr=Conjuration; Bodies: Velociraptor-Dragon hybrid {main, intersex}]POWERS[/abbr] — INFORMATION — OTHER[/fancypost][/fancypost]


    [fancypost bgcolor= white; border: 0px solid white; width: 405px; height: 117px; opacity: 0.80;margin-left: -17px][fancypost bgcolor= white; border: 0px solid white; width: 400px; height: 108px; opacity: 1.00;margin-left: -11px; font-family: candara; text-align: justify; overflow:auto; font-size: 11px; line-height: 100%; color: black]"N-no. No you're not." Astrarot half-growled, shaking their head and continuing to stare at Lich with an intense red stare.
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    [size=7pt]© counselor dreamíe ; image credit to owners[/size]

    [size=4pt]#fifthfancy / [c] fifth

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    [fancypost bgcolor= transparent; bordercolor= transparent; width: 467px; color: white; font-family: times new roman;text-transform:lowercase][justify][size=12]what a scene. although young and innocent, Paige clearly knew something was up. "what happened to lit?" the pup asked with a hushed tone before fixing her gaze on him. "how did you get an owie on your wrist, lit? Are you okay?" the ivory canine asked, her onyx orbs voided by worry.
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    "Because he cut himself on purpose." The feline was leaning against the door frame, chewing her gum as she studied Litch, a calm look in her hazel eyes. Oh yes, this was a time that Alani really had knowledge in these kinds of things. The yelling, the breaking and most importantly, the cutting. She put her weight off the door and padded forwards, swallowing her gum, heavily pierced ears flickering as she halted near Litch, though not to close so that he appeared crowded. The girl had cut herself plenty of times back in the human world and the first time had not been a pretty sight. She tried everything. Pills, rope, knife, but all were in vain. She was given anti-depressants after her mother found the cuts on her wrist and it was goodbye to social life.


    "Litch. I don't know why you're sad, simply because i don't know you well enough, but no matter how cheesy or f*cking stupid this sounds, you're not alone." She said, attempting to bend forwards and place a damp cloth on his forehead and face to wipe away the tears before throwing it against the wall behind her.

    [fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 450px][align=right][size=25px][font=corbel][i]LEONA[/fancypost][fancypost bgcolor=; border: none; width: 450px; font-family: corbel; font-size: 14px; text-align: justify; margin-top: -20px][b]"Alani is right. We are always here for you." Leona murmured in agreement as she pressed the towel to his cut and applied enough pressure to hopefully stop the bleeding.