welcoмe... [paғp capтaιn aмerιca]... тo тнe new age

“I don’t know what a Gordon Ramsey is.” Loki shook his head, not understanding her joke. He guessed whatever a Gordon Ramsey is, it was probably a person, they had something to do with food.

He stepped inside of the elevator with Ashley and pressed the button to the desired floor and then yawned, covering his mouth with the inside of his elbow as he did so.

And then, he looked at his reflection. He looked good going out And he still looked just as good coming in.

Once the doors opened, he stepped out, giving the rest of the bags to Ashley. He nodded at her words and then headed to the kitchen.

Abel had been sitting at the breakfast bar eating a sandwich. “Welcome back, Lokes.” He greeted the god, smiling at him.

Except Loki didn’t smile back. Instead, he rolled up his sleeves and then turned around to wash his hands at the sink.

“I think...” Abel began with a mouthful of food. “You look really sexy when you roll up your sleeves like that. Can you doing it again, just for me?”

He expected a witty, smart, rude response of some sort. But he didn’t get it. Instead, Loki continued to wash his hands.

Abel swallowed his food and then drank his water. “Whatever. I was out today and I was talking to this lady who loves my flirty comments. Are you making dinner? If so, I think I’m going to invite her over.”

Still no response from Loki.

Abel rolled his eyes. And quietly finished up the rest of his food, watching as Loki dried his hands and then walked over to the fridge.

He guessed that he’d just wait until Ashley came back to talk to her. Because Loki was being a grouch more than usual. And maybe it had to do with what happened earlier.

But still. That was hours ago.

And it was in the future. None of it counted.

Abel turned around upon hearing the bedroom door open. He immediately knew that it had been the door to Ashley’s room.

How? He just did.

He made a face at her comment and then patted the empty stool next to his. “Are you saying Steve isn’t sexy? Because he is.”

He then turned around. “Anyways. We can watch Loki cook together. How was you guys’ day out?” He asked. “Did you guys go out to eat? Go to the movies? Make out a little in the dark?” He teased, still a bit bothered by Loki’s lack of response.

If Abel didn’t know any better, he’d say Loki was ignoring him. Which hurt his heart just a little.

“Okay. Well he’s obviously ignoring me. So I’ll talk to you.” He looked at Ashley. “How was your evening?” He asked her, propping an elbow up on the countertop and then resting his head on his hand. He looked at Ashley.

“I was out earlier.” He sat up to dig his hand in his pocket. He pulled out a small slip of paper and gave it to Ashley. “I went to that cafe place we went to a while ago. And as I was waiting for my order, I chatted it up with some girl. And she thought I was funny and cute and she gave me her number but I dont have a phone to text her back so can you get me a phone?”

Loki found himself making a face in response to the question. Abel was asking his girlfriend to get him a phone?

Was he drunk?

“Are you drunk?” Loki asked. He didn’t sound angry. But there was a hint of anger in his tone. Barely noticeable. But if you noticed stuff like that, it was noticeable.

“No. Why?”

“You just asked her to buy you a phone. Buy your own phone.”

“I don’t have any money.”

“Guess you have to get a job, then.”

Abel rolled his eyes. “Okay, dad. I’ll just ask Tony then.”

“Oh. That sounds exciting. Someone who can bother Loki more than me or Tony? That sounded fun. He wondered who this mystery person was.

He had to be really annoying. Or maybe he was really happy. Or an idiot. Or maybe all of the three.

“Yes. She was beautiful.” He waggled his brows and looked at Loki, who had stopped cutting up an onion to adjust his sleeves. “She had a nice butt.”

Loki brushed his hair out of his face to the best of his ability with the back of his hand and then continued to cut.

The god shrugged in response to Ashley’s comment. He guessed that what she said was true. If Abel was busy flirting with his girl, then he wouldn’t mess with him and Ashley.

“Okay. Get him a phone then.” Loki nodded.

Loki looked at Astrid upon hearing her. And he wondered how she got down the few stairs by herself.

In fact, when she’d learn how to waddle?

Last time Loki saw her, she was a raisin. And now she was walking and talking.

He watched as Ashley picked up the child and she looked at him, attempting to call him.

Attempting.

Instead, he half smiled - clearly a forced smile - and then continued to dice up the onion.

“Aww I love babies. Give her here.” Abel held out his hands for Astrid. “Hi, Astrid, baby. Do you know me?” He smiled at her.

Loki rolled his eyes and slid the diced onions to the side before getting the pan ready.

He guessed that he’d make rice. Chicken and rice. He had found some chicken breasts in Tony’s freezer and put them in hot water so they’d thaw out. He hoped that by the time he was done making rice the chicken would be useable.

“I think she likes you, Loki.” Abel said.

“Everyone likes me.” The god stated.

“He seems like a fun guy.” Abel smiled, not seeing the glared that Loki sent him.

He wasn’t fun. At all. He was annoying.

“Oh. Nothing bad about you is said behind your back.” Abel told Ashley. “I promise you that.” Then, he looked at Loki.

“You know, Lokes, I read somewhere that babies are a great judge of character. Maybe that’s because they don’t really know good or evil. So they just see everything as good. Who knows?” Abel shrugged, noticing that Astrid wanted to get to Loki.

But he didn’t reply. Abel looked at Ashley. “Look, talk to him for me. Because he’s ignoring me. And if I say something to him again and he ignores me again, I’m gonna bash him upside the head with that hot pan!” He threatened, obviously angry.

“Whoa there, tiger. Calm down.” Tony exited the elevator moments before hearing Abel’s outburst.

“Geez. It’s like he’s going through puberty. You’re hungry. You’re growing. AND you’re emotional. I don’t know how you work, but that sounds like puberty to me.” Tony walked over to Abel and smiled at Astrid.

“Oh. Who’s that?” He pointed to Loki, not recognising him for a moment. He was facing the sink. So all he saw was his back.

And he wasn’t wearing his usual clothes.

Yeah, he had been around when they left. But Tony didn’t even remember what he had for breakfast.

“Wait. Is that Loki?” He paused. “It is! I know that back anywhere.”

“Oh my gosh. Tony, go away. It was already bad before you got here. You’ll just make things worse.” Loki turned around and looked at Tony.

“Oh my gosh. You’ll talk to him but not me?”

“Fine.” Abel crossed his arms over his chest. He hated being scolded. She hadn’t been rude about it. But it was still a scold.

No one liked being scolded.

“Maybe he likes Loki.” Tony sat down on the other side of Abel and waggled his brows. “I don’t judge.”

Before Abel could object, Tony continued talking. “I remember when he was a short, chubby-faced skinny boy.” Tony poked Abel’s cheek.

Abel had been no taller than Ashley upon arriving.

“And now he’s almost taller than you, Loki. And he can bruise thor? I’d hate to get in a fight with you. Unless of course you hurt Skylar. Or hurt me. Then I’d love to kick your ass.”

Loki appreciated Ashley’s words. Because that meant Abel would leave him alone for now. Now Tony and Abel could mess with each other.

“Oh my gosh you guys are rubbing off on her. If Steve or Rachael hears that, we’re dead.” Tony spoke. He knew that Steve and Rachael weren’t really the violent type, despite the fact that Steve had kicked ass as a job back then and nowadays.

And Rachael had her moment of ‘hit anything that moves.’

Overall though, the two of them were pretty ex-violence. Unless violence was needed. So if they heard Astrid say that, they’d flip.

“Nonsense. I think they’ll be fine.” Loki smiled, hearing the concern in Tony’s tone.

Tony stood. “Ashley, this isn’t the time to talk about perverted people. Astrid just said something bad. What are we going to do?”

“Dude, we’ll just explain to them what happened. Are you seriously concerned?” While Abel agreed that Astrid repeating such a phrase wasn’t desirable, Steve and Rachael were understanding. They’d understand that it was a mistake.

“Oh. Skylar. Hi.” Tony smiled a large ear-to-ear smile. He hadn’t seen her at all today, if he remembered correctly. And yeah, they didnt really spend time together. But it was weird not seeing her at least once a day.

That’s crazy. Because a few years ago, if he would’ve saw her, it would’ve been like ‘get this girl out of my face.’

How the times have changed ...

“Of course I didn’t make enough for everyone else.” Loki scoffed. And if anyone had thought that someone did so, then they were on the wrong boat.

Because he’d only make enough for himself and Ashley.

He looked up at Ashley upon hearing her words. And he had got distracted by her small action. “Okay.” He nodded.

“Oh and he’s very compliant.” Tony whispered.

What in the world happened to him? No smart comments. No weird looks. No arguing. And he was obedient?

Usually he listened to Ashley. But there was just something different about how he said it. There was no fight in his voice.

It didn’t sound as if he’d make some comment afterwards.

Tony looked at Skylar, waiting to hear her answer. Bucky usually was with her. But he wasn’t. “Is he asleep?”

He glanced at his watch. It wasn’t late. But it was late enough.

If Bucky wasn’t working out with Steve, eating or kicking ass, he was asleep. And he knew he wasn’t with Steve because Steve was in the room with Rachael.

So, Bucky had to be sleeping.

And Tony was right.

Tony appreciated it. He was glad that she actually didn’t call him dad. Not only did it make him feel old, but he still didn’t feel worthy of the title.

Of course, pops made him feel old too.

And imagine when Astrid started to refer to him as grandad or something of that sort. Then tony would definitely flip.

Or break his back trying.

“Oh, kiddo, I don’t have any new gadgets. I’ve just been touching up on the stuff I already have.” Tony told Skylar.

He had a few blueprints for stuff here and there. But nothing was built yet.

He then looked at Loki, watching as he sautéed his diced onions. He had a pot on the stove too. Tony didn’t know what was inside. But it seemed like he was boiling something. Something to go with the food he was cooking.

“I wonder how long it’ll hold up.” Tony spoke, looking at Ashley. It was weird seeing Loki behave. And he wondered how long Loki would continue to do so.

Would it be a day? A week? A month? The rest of his life?

The subject was changed when Ashley told him about a friend she made. And this time, he listened. Last time he kinda blew her off. He had been freaking out over the fact that Astrid said a bad phrase.

“Guy in a red and black suit who isn’t the web guy from a few cities over?” Tony arched a brow. “Who’s that guy?”

“Who’s the web guy?” Abel inquired, looking at Ashley as well.

“Please don’t break anything I already have in the process.” While Tony trusted her a lot more around his workshop than he had when he first met her, he still felt as though he should issue the warning.

Because he didn’t trust her THAT much. But he trusted her enough to leave her unattended in his workshop.

“Oh he likes Steve too?” Abel grinned, waggling his brows and looking at Tony. “Looks like you’ll have a little competition if he ever comes around, buddy.”

“Competition my ass. I understand that Steve is a married man with a daughter. There’s no competition because Rachael already won.” Tony stated matter-of-factly as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Oh. Don’t say anything about ass around him. I don’t want to know what he’ll do.” Loki warned, looking at Tony.

“He can’t be that bad, though. Ashley likes him.” Abel stated. Ashley wasn’t an idiot. Sure, she tried to see the good in people. But she knew a good person from a bad person. If he was bad, she wouldn't like him, right??

The only exception had been Loki.

He was bad. And she liked him.

She loved him, actually.

“Ashley likes everyone though.” Tony pointed out. He then looked at the blonde. “No offence.” He then looked back at Abel. “Good or bad doesn’t really matter in her book.” He pointed to Loki. “He’s like one of the best examples of that. Anyways, Loki...”

Tony looked at Loki. “What are you making for dinner?”

“Nothing for you. So it doesn’t matter.”

“Yeah. You can say that again.” Tony grew up hating Captain America. His father would always talk about him and tell Tony how he should try to be more like the soldier.

And Tony used to hate it. His best was never enough. But Captain America’s ‘least’ was enough to make his dad swoon?

It didn’t seem fair.

It had actually been Tony’s first time meeting Captain America when Loki pulled the whole ‘Chitauri’ stunt.

And yeah, Cap was cool. But not cool enough to make your own child feel like crap.

That was just Tony’s opinion, though.

It hadn’t taken Loki long to make the food. When he had checked on the chicken to see if it was useable, it was still frozen solid. So, he had put it away and decided to use some shrimp which had already been thawed out and sitting in the fridge waiting to be used.

He guessed that someone was gonna use it.

Oh well. You snooze you lose.

So because Loki decided to use something that was already ready to be used, that took down the cooking time.

And as the shrimp cooked, he made some broccoli.

So, in total, the meal only took about a half hour to prepare. And when he was done, he stood back and looked at the plates he made.

Shrimp and fried rice with broccoli on the side.

Just as he was about to tell Ashley he was done (she probably already knew, though), the elevator doors opened.

“Oh no.” Loki groaned.

“Oh yes. Loki, baby, did you miss me?”

It hadn’t even been a whole day since they parted with the merc and he was back.

“Oh my gosh! IS THAT TONY STARK?”

“Uh, JARVIS, security breach.”

Tony slid off of his stool as Deadpool approached him, a large grin on his masked face.

“I LOVE YOU. YOURE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL MAN. I USED TO MASTURBATE TO YOUR PHOTOS WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER. AND NOW IM MEETING YOU IN REAL LIFE. THIS CANT BE REAL. IM GONNA DIE. PLEASE SHAKE MY HAND.” He extended his hand for Tony to shake but he just stared at it, looking grossed out.

In fact, everyone looked grossed out.

And Abel did for a moment before he smiled. “Aw he’s so weird!” He then looked at Ashley. “He’s all right.” He gave her a thumbs up and then looked back at him.

Deadpool looked at Abel. “Oh my gosh. I don’t know what you just said but your accent is sexy. Don’t tell Loki that, though. He might get jealous.”

“Has anyone told you that you look like Enrique Egglasses?” Deadpool asked, looking at Abel.

“All the time. Except, I think you butchered his name.”

“Potato potato.” The merc shrugged and then he looked at Ashley. “Yeah. I would’ve called. Except I lost my phone. I think I left it in my cabbie’s car. But that doesn’t matter. What does matter is- holy smokes.”

He had lost his train of thought when Rachael entered the room. She looked like she just woke up. But she still looked good. “Oh yeah. I’ve definitely seen you before.”

Loki decided that eating in the room didn’t sound that bad. He usually liked to eat in the dining area. But if that idiot was around, he’d be eating in the room.

“I’ll be in the room if you need me. Feel free to join me.” Loki told Ashley before grabbing his plate and leaving. He muttered a greeting to Rachael as he walked past her. And after that, he was gone.

“Aww. The party was just getting started.” Deadpool frowned. “That’s okay. He’s a bit of a buzzkill anyways.” And then he looked at Rachael.

“Oh. Yeah. Where are my manners? My name is Deadpool. And you have tit-”

Steve entered the room rubbing his eyes. “Did someone make dinner?” He asked.

When he opened his eyes, he spotted the merc and frowned. “Um, who is this?” He said almost in unison with Skylar.

He looked over at the brunette upon hearing her realising that she had said the same thing. “Yeah. What she said.”

Deadpool hadn’t even registered that Skylar entered the room because Captain America was right there.

“Oh my gosh. You look so much better in person than you do in the movies.”

“The movies?”

“And in the comics.” He walked over to Steve, who took a step back. “I don’t know who you are.”

“That’s okay. Just give me like 10 minutes in a room with you and you’ll know exactly who I am.”

“What?” Steve made a ‘wtf’ face.

“Oh my gosh. Even when he makes faces he still looks sexy.”

Abel smiled. This guy wasn’t that bad. Of course, he could be better. But he wasnt that bad. Loki was just a stickler, that’s all.

“Skylar, this is Deadpool. He’s really cool.”