still alive but barely breathing. [ p. aelin

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When he tensed I immediately dropped my arm, thinking it was too awkward he didn't want that, so I tucked it back to me with a frown. Out of all the possible things that could be wrong, I didn't think it would be that . I myself tensed up, anger boiling up out of nowhere. No. Not her. She couldnt be alive. "You saw her dead," I frowned. "How do you know? Did you see her?" I stood up. "Was she on the boat? Oh I'll kill her," I said clenching my fists, taking steps towards the boats. "There is no possible way that woman was allowed to live," I was more than angry now I want to hit something I wanted to hit Aana. And I hated that I felt this way. I'd only felt hate for a person when my parents were killed, never a hate this strong.

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I paused as he took my hand, anger momentarily subsiding for a while as he held onto my hand. "How does Jake know? How could he possibly know?" I asked as I stared at the ground, an unhappy expression on my face. "She better not learn where you are. She better not come within twenty feet of us," I was shaking a little. Of course the thought of her coming back into Cinder's life was unnerving. He'd said he'd had feelings for her, in other words, and maybe...maybe I was jealous that maybe if she came back his feelings for her would be there. I don't know. I looked at him, taking his other hand. "Let's get out of here," I said and glanced towards where Jake had gone impatiently. We needed to get on the boat and drive back home. I wasn't sure if my current house was home. I think home was with Cinder. Yeah cheesy, but whatever. We needed to get somewhere safe.

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I said nothing afterwards. Actually I don't think I wanted to say anything again, for a long time. Everything felt strange and I thought for a moment the two of us could be happy after today. With his family. Guess life wasn't that easy. I let go of his hand and crossed my arms, lingering in the back of the group instead with Cinder, following them to the boat. When Cinder asked if I knew how to drive a boat I just shrugged and got onto the thing. I looked around the controls, before I found what looked like a key and put it in, twisting it. The steering thing had a wheel, but it also had a lever. I think I could figure it out. I waved my hand and motioned for them all to get on, and once they were I figured out how to get it to go forwards. Now, docking...that was going to be interesting.

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I played around with the controls in curiousity. I hit the horn button accidentally and jumped, before giving everyone an apologetic glance. I hope I didn't wake his dad or his mom. I was going slow, because poor Tracy looked terrified. I headed towards home, though at first it took me a while to find the shore. Thank goodness the skies were getting dark, so we could use the shadows to our advantage. I'm sure a bunch of odd creatures like them would go unnoticed at night. Not so much in the daytime. People would notice. I glanced at Cinder for a moment, and he was asking if he did anything. I shook my head no, twice to both of his questions. I gave him a look that said not to worry and I focused on getting across the water. I didn't know how long it was before the shore was closer, and I reduced the speed, avoiding other boats docked, and went right for the beach, luclily empty, and let the boat slide until it hit. Then I shut off the boat and stood up to get off.

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I got off the boat eventually and stood on the beach, watching as Jake and Becca took their time enjoying the water. It made me smile a bit. I wasn't sure if I was expecting them to stay at the house. Maybe not. Cinder was pointing them off towards a forest and I smiled, waving goodbye as they all left. I might have even thought Cinder was going to go with them, but he stayed. I smiled, but my smile disappeared when he took steps away. I took this as him not wanting to come with me. I frowned and turned back around. "It's okay if you want to go with them. I'll hitch a ride back," I mumbled as I headed up the sandy beach towards the road. "Really I'll understand," I added as I glanced back to see if he was going to go.

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I relaxed a little more, the smile coming back as he described what happened when he was asleep around his family. I tried to imagine him with lipstick or mascara and I laughed, shaking my head. "You're lucky I like you. I wouldn't do any of that," I said and then shuffled my feet. "I'm not mad. At least not at you," I said and rubbed my arms. "It's her " I didn't even want to say her name anymore. I crossed my arms and rubbed my shoulders, staring at him, feeling something weird in my chest as he asked to go home. I nodded and shuffled back towards him, wrapping my arms around him so he could go ahead and fly us back. "Yeah let's go home,"

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I didn't delve into too much thinking about us flying. Honestly I was just thinking about how I got to hold onto him. God I was in deep. I needed to calm down. I laughed quietly into his shoulder as he asked where I lived again. I had to turn a little bit so I could see the town below us. It was a little hard in the darkness but the street lights below helped. "Um...wow I've never seen this from above..." I had trouble for a while before I found the large white house a little ways off. "There, with the peeling paint. The only old looking one," I pointed so he knew which. "Land on the roof. Windows open and I'm too lazy to walk up the stairs,"

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I felt slight relief that we were back. I realized how exhausted I felt. All the crying, the building being destroyed. My family, his family, the news of Aana. I just...wanted to curl up into a ball and stay like that for days and days. I smiled, a small one at that, at his comment and I gave him a Not. "Thank you, sir," I whispered. I heard the jingling of a collar and the scrambling of paws on stairs and suddenly Jack was in the room, whimpering and sniffing and licking the both of us. I got down and hugged him, ruffling his fur. "Oh I missed you too you furball," I said and then let go of him, going over to the floor where the blankets were and plopped down, already curling up. Jack took the bed for himself. I left space and blanket room for Cinder to sleep next to me, like usual. "Close the window and come over here," I yawned. I didn't want the window open. In case Aana found us or something. I was worried she would. If she was alive I had a feeling she wanted to find Cinder.

I rubbed my eyes, yawning as I got all comfortable there on the ground. I opened up the blanket as he scrambled inside and curled up into a ball. I reached over and rubbed his bad affectionately. "You're the best thing that's happened to me," I murmured quietly. "I'm so happy you're in my life now," I added and then sighed, yawning and closing my eyes, smiling as I curled up a little as well, trying to fall asleep. It had been a long, emotional, scary day and I tried not to think about the recent news of Aana, and focused on what he told me in the tree. It comforted me more.

Since I had my eyes closed, his reaching out to pull me closer was startling. I relaxed though, as I felt his chin on my head. I let out a relaxing sigh and curled up against him, burying my face in his shoulder, one hand bunching up his shirt. He really didn't have to say anything in response, this gesture was enough to let me know what he wanted to say. "Night," I murmured. I realized that his dream had mostly come true, minus his family living and our kiss. But I wasn't about to bring that up. I just remembered. I squeezed my eyes shut tighter and let sleep take me away.