a realm of possibilities [private, TERRA] open to our hearts

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    Ari, on the other hand, was the opposite. She was very emotional, but then again - what woman wasn't? As a result, when Terra smiled that tiny little thing, she flashed him a grin and laughed softly herself. "For a couple of hours," she replied with that sideways grin still in place. "There was a reason Zombie neve-" she cut herself off, pain visible on her face as she did so. She shook her head, silently, the joy and mirth inside of her fading as another black wolf, this one with brilliant red eyes, welled in her mind. Shortly following, the multicolored form of Valda. Arianna felt like cursing, crying and just dissolving into nothing - any thought of home did this. Brought the memories. Brought up all the bad things, the death, the abandonment. Brought the damn tears. Arianna blinked them away angrily, but a couple still managed to escape and she shook herself, eyes lifting to meet Terra's once more. "Sorry," she muttered, voice gruff even as she looked away


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    Oh damn, she was crying. Now Terra felt the need to comfort, though he had no idea how. His eyes widened rather dramatically, ears flicking forwards to show that he was at attention. The dark wolf gave a small whine before he managed to speak.
    "I- d'ya wanna... talk 'bout it?"


    His words were stiff again, awkward and halted in speech.

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    ooc. Awkward Terra is cute and hilarious *dies* on a side note go listen to "I'm not the one" by 3oh3! I sorta see terra eventually basically saying parts of this to Ari. Only pop song I'll ever listen to.. xD


    From the corner of her eye, Arianna saw his expression. And then she heard the whine, and she felt like both laughing and crying. What came out was a small laugh, with a desperate tinge to it. Laugh or cry, that was the situation. She grasped onto that amusement, looking up at Terra with shining eyes - except, this time those eyes shone with the unshed tears. "Not if it makes you uncomfortable," she said with as much of a smile as she could muster. She realized, though, that she did want to speak of it - she wanted to speak the whole of her life, the pain, the joy, to someone who would understand. But then again, who would understand?


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    [ooc. i've never heard that song, i'm listening to it just now. c: ]


    The wolf hesitated, eyes flicking over Arianna- the truth was, he wasn't a therapist. He wasn't a talker, and had difficulties being introspective, trying to figure out what emotions meant. The greying snout of the Alpha attempted to nudge the top of Arianna's head, the only way he knew how to offer some comfort. When he did speak, it was low and grumbly as it was normally. It was a product of a low voice and a seldom used speech.
    [b]"I ain't a talker, can't figure most stuff out, but I'm a decent listener."

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    ooc. I had to dig up history I already typed for someone, and I was intending to copy and paste and then I realized half of this happened after I typed the history up for the art commission and so HERE IT IS.


    Arianna felt the nudge, and indeed she did feel comforted, despite the awkwardness behind it. She nodded to his words, adknowledging them – thought she disagreed with the ‘doesn’t understand anything’ bit. She sighed, her gaze roaming the forest in front of her. She sat down, gaze still ahead. “Where to start? The beginning, I guess.


    “I was born to a fling. My father encountered a wolf in heat, and that wolf seduced him. MY mother never wanted me. She would tell me how she wished I was never born, and the like. If I ever argued, she would beat me until I was dizzy. The moment I was weaned, I was left in Westeros, to a father who never wanted me. He accepted me as his child, and let me into his home – Winterfell – but never had anything to do with me. It was Winterfell I met Tyvian Lannister, my first true friend… and Zombie Vantas.” Eyes darkened at the mention of both names, and the female let out a long sigh before continuing.


    “Tyvian and I got along because… well, I’m not sure. Maybe it was our constant squabbling and grumbles to each other?” A smile, soft, touched her lips and eyes as she rembered, particularly the day where she sent snow all over him. “Zombie and I… was a bit more complicated. He was a complete asshole to everyone, including me. But somehow, I got to him – he started showing me 'a side he showed none others; an affectionate, genuine side – the real bit.


    "In the meantime, the Queen, Skyrim Baratheon, was being… irresponsible, to say the least. Let’s just say she did a lot of idiotic things. The most idiotic of things she ever tried to do was try to steal Zombie away. I wasn’t… interested in Zombie romantically, not at the time. He was my best friend, my closest friend.


    "Months passed… and that’s when I realized Zombie wasn’t acting normal.” Ari’s eyes closed against the pain those memories brought. “He was crazed… as if possessed, or mentally ill. I followed him… and he found Hazel. Hazel Lannister, sister of Ace Lannister… a little german shepherd, so sweet and innocent and only a few months old. I was only a little bit older, and Zombie only a little older than me… he killed her. Ate her alive. I bit him, tried to pull him away… I failed.” It still grated on her, that failure, just a little bit – it was obvious by the tension in her voice, the grief. Her voice lowering, she continued.


    “I went to him, after. All I knew, in my shock, that it wasn’t actually him. It was something else. I protected him, when the others were angry. I was right. But I was still angry at my failure, and so I avoided him. I blamed him, I blamed myself. Mostly myself. He found me a few days later and we… we spoke of it. We spoke of everything, all the tension and we agreed to work on both our problems, everything together.”


    Arianna fell silent after that, gaze never wavering from her vigil. She wasn’t done, she wasn’t nearly done, and it was oh so obvious she wasn’t nearly done. It was… the pain of what she lost, that was what wounded her. What hurt her. What caused the silent stream of tears cascading from her eyes. With another deep breath, a bracing inside, she spoke once more, yellow eyes closing as the images rose in her mind.


    “Months passed. We were happy, for the most part. Skyrim was a thorn in my side, and I wished for my father when I remembered to think about him, but… there was happiness. In fact, I even began to get along with Skyrim. We played together, started to forge a bond. Then Zombie nearly died. He went hunting, for him and me, alone one night. I went to sleep, knowing I would wake up when he returned, for the fresh scent would arose me. That never came. In fact, I awoke with pale light, knowing something was wrong. And I was right. Zombie had been attacked, and was nearly dead.


    "He survived, though. My father went through an attack as well… and it changed him. A lot. In good ways… and in one bad way – he had another fling with someone, but this time he was taking her as mate as well. Not because of love, but of duty. Those pups would replace me; I would be cast aside, illegitimate.” Arianna grimaced and shook her head lightly, mentally moving on.


    “It was only a month or so later that… that Valda appeared.” Her voice choked with tears, and she bent her head down. “Valda was… everything. She was innocence, she was light, she was soothing… she was practically a daughter to me, nevermind that she was only months younger. I loved her.” The last bit was a ragged whisper with shaking shoulders. She swallowed hard.


    “Zombie appeared less frequently. I thought nothing of it. I was frequent as well. I taught Valda how to stand the cold, I taught her how to hunt, and she in turn showed me bits and pieces of how to heal. She became Valda Stark, of my family. She was so gentle; so kind.. she didn’t deserve what happened to her.


    “The humans attacked, months later. By then, I noticed Zombie’s disappearance and it worried me, and it hurt me, but I could weather it. One of the humans hit Valda in their assault… I didn’t notice it! I… it became infected, and I still didn’t notice. I was hunting, and when I came back… she had been trying to go down the stairs, and she failed. She fell. She broke. She died.” Ari turned to look at Terra, eyes still dripping with tears, desperation within them. “She called me ‘mother’. She said it hurt. She said ‘please be there when I go to the stars.’” True, those words hadn't been for her – but Ari never knew. She never knew they had been for Agatha, so she still believed they were for her. And it hurt her even more.


    Her body shook, and she turned away from the alpha. “Zombie never returned. He disappeared, too. My father withdrew back. I hid, hid in the castle, secluding myself. Blaming myself. I still do! I should have noticed, I should have…” her body shook from her withholding herself, forcing herself to speak. “Zombie still didn’t return. A month later, I left. People then appeared, but… I couldn’t stay anymore. Too much… too much. I left, heading north of Stark lands. North to the Wall, where I shifted into a dragon form and flew. Flew until I couldn’t, and I collapsed. I bypassed direwolf lands and dragon lands without stopping. I found things to eat, I don’t even remember. I wandered, just pushing forward, in a daze… and then I found myself in the Nox.” Pain was still in her voice, her eyes, but she was more contained; she was no longer the emotional ball of… well, emotions.


    “Then, days ago Zombie appeared. He appeared, with no idea I was in the Nox. No idea where I was. He was just there, by coincidence. Me being here as well was coincidental. He left. He didn’t even come back… not even when V-Valda died.” Her head bowed, pain in every bit of her body. Her tears had dried, and she felt… drained. She wanted to collapse, dissolve into the dirt and into oblivion. That wouldn’t happen, though.


    EDIT: AND ARI'S FATHER JUST FREAKING KILLED HIMSELF OMFG ARI IS ALREADY MESSED UP OMG THIS IS GONNA MAKE IT WORSE



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    Terra remained silent for the entirety of the story, though he tried to press himself against Arianna, offer a shoulder for her to lean on. His eyes narrowed at parts, casting downwards at others. It felt very personal, and it was, so the Alpha clung onto every word, every emotion so that he could support her however she needed to be supported.


    But what was he supposed to say? 'I'm sorry'? No, he wasn't sorry- he felt for her, but she had been strong enough to get through it, and strong enough to share it, so he figured he was obliged to share with her. No, not obliged, it just.. it was the right thing.
    "I... dunno if you've noticed, but I've got a son and a daughter here. Yukine and Harley. They're the loves of my life, and every day I just want to protect them."


    His words were slow, carefully thought out as though he was struggling to speak about it.
    "They had siblings, but they're either dead or... gone. Before them, it was me and my mate."


    He clenched his jaw, demanding his eyes not to cry, and though they glazed over, they did not tear up.
    "Hema... Hema was everything to me. It was hard sometimes, especially because for a long time he was a cat, and that was like a death sentence. I loved him throughout it all, and one day he became she and she was going to be the mother of our pups. I don't think I had ever been that happy in my life. When the time came I-"


    He had to stop, jaw slack a little bit. He wasn't sure he wanted to continue, but he couldn't stop.
    "She couldn't do it. None of us could stop the bleeding, and while the pups lived, I had to say good-bye."


    That was all he could manage, and the wolf turned to try and rest his head atop Arianna's

    The post was edited 1 time, last by vampy. ().

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    When Terra pressed himself against her, she leaned gratefully on in, and when she finished her story... she didn't move. Instead, she listened with the same intense, uninterrupting focus that he did with her. She twitched in surprise - no, she didn't know, and she didn't notice those two were his children. They looked nothing alike, and in all her eavesdropping she hadn't heard mention of it. True, Harley had interacted with Terra in a comfortable way... but she figured that she had a higher place in a pack, a place where that was allowed and encouraged. Nope, something entirely different.


    When the alpha paused, she pressed herself against him, nevermind the fact she was already leaning on him. This was different; it was meant to be a comforting type of pressure - not a lean. A... she didn't exactly know what, but it felt right. And when Terra finished, she found herself with nothing to say. She didn't know what she could say. So instead, when he rested his head on top of hers, she tucked her head against his shoulder and said nothing at all. Instead, she gave as much comfort as was given to her, hopefully.


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    The fact that Arianna said nothing helped greatly- he wasn't looking for 'I'm sorry's and 'that's awful's. he had gotten those enough, they were in the eyes of his packmates every time it got rough, every time he was down, he could see some of them remembering exactly why. This was better, the two of them supporting each other (literally) without having to stammer out awkward replies and halfhearted condolences. Like this, Terra knew what he was doing.


    He was fine like this- he was fine.

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    ooc. you know, it's the same in real life. I actually had a debate about this, and silence really is better than the halfhearted 'i'm sorry's.


    Arianna sighed, feeling the last of the dreaded mental pain drain away with it. She didn't move, though. She didn't want to. If she heard Terra's thoughts right now, she'd agree with them - completely. This was so much better than apologies. If Terra had apologized... she wouldn't have known what she had done. Left? Attacked? She had no clue. As is... she was thankful. And since Terra couldn't exactly see her - nevermind it was obvious by the lean - she murmured, "Thank you."


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    [ooc. yeah, i find that the case more often than not; you can get a lot of pity in your life, and sometimes you get sick of it. or at least i do cx ]


    In response, the Alpha nodded- that had been what he had wanted to say. He gingerly moved his head, reluctant to but feeling that they should. Terra's eyes flicked to the ground and back again, and the wolf himself began to stand, despite his instincts screaming for him to not.
    "Come on, we should head back."

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    Ooc. I get sick of it -.- and then you catch yourself doing the same thing because you feel you HAVE to say something. Ugh.


    It felt rather weird to have someone nod, while their head was resting on top of yours. Very odd indeed. At the same time, though, Arianna found that she didn't mind - rather, it amused her, briefly, before fading and leaving her alone in that peaceful feeling of emptiness Terra moved away, she sighed, pushing her own body away and standing up swiftly. She felt the same thing Terra did; her mind - thinking mind - saying that moving would be a rather good idea, and her instinctual part of her screaming otherwise.


    She listened to the thinking part, and she nodded to Terra, standing next to him. Nothing more was really needed, so she didn't bother responding verbally.


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    [ooc. actually, i fail at comforting, so when either of my friends are sad, i sort of plop onto them limply and yell that i'm a 'comfort ninja'. pfff i don't hide behind humour ]


    At that, the Alpha began to lead the way back, pretending that he wasn't mulling things over and trying to figure them out. No, he wasn't letting this get to him, of course not... right?


    [ooc. thread end? ]

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    ooc. Why can't I be your irl friend omfg


    Arianna was also thinking, trailing behind her alpha as they went back to the main camp for the Nox - her new home. It was more than just a place in her mind... It was now a home.


    ooc again. Thread end c: New thread? If so, when should it take place? Up to you, I don't mind either option (waiting, or not)
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  • [fancypost borderwidth=0px; width: 400px; ][justify]ooc. i can make a new thread tomorrow, but i'mma go bug you over pm x3

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    Okie


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    /would you like to timeskip? i have little muse at the moment, but i might be able to reply

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    ooc. I expected a new thread, honsetly xD I don't mind a timeskip at all c:


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    /okay! i know i'm uber lazy but i'm so tired



    Night had fallen, covering the world in the cool blanket of crisp air and the indigo hues touched by the soft white light of the moon. The camp was, more or less, silent- most were sleeping, while a few members remained awake, speaking in hushed tones or laughing once in a while. The moon provided enough light to see by, the silence just quiet enough to be able to detect the soft footfalls of a massive wolf, moving quietly but not without a trace of sound.


    It happened that he paused before a den, curious as to whether or not the inhabitant was inside, or if this was even the right den. A moment passed where he hesitated, questioning his own actions before deciding to throw caution to the wind.
    "Arianna? Are you awake?"
    The lay, nestled in the highest part of the sky, but perhaps she would be awake at this hour.

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    The silence, the soft sounds and whispers of the late-night members of the Nox... it all soothed Arianna. It was like... she wasn't quite sure what it was like. Not quite like the serenity of digging in the snow, a temporary den. It was... different. And she loved it, honestly.


    The moonlight glimmered at the entrance of that den, not reaching her eyes - though if she opened them, she'd see the pale light dancing in time with the leaves. However, she had no intention of opening her eyes. She was just about to fall asleep, another peaceful night... when a voice disturbed her.


    "No," the wolf grumbled, head lifting to glare blurrily out the entrance at the massive paws of her alpha. She wiggled around, quite loudly to stick her head out the entrance, the rest of her body still within the little cubby in the earth. She tilted her head upside down, to look up at the giant wolf. She knew she looked comical, but. Eh. She didn't care. If it had been anybody but Terra, she'd not have responded - however, he was her alpha, and she felt... well, obliged to.


    ooc. I relate to you completely.I really should be studying right now. NOPE. /dies.


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    /haha, luckily i finished our introduction to pipettes lab early so i don't have to work on figuring out the concentration/volume. so no more homework! except all that math i'm ignoring but also go und stuuudy


    The Alpha held back a chuckle at the sort of adorable way Arianna poked out of the den. He remained standing, grinning down at the other wolf with a hidden excitement in his eyes. The light cast a shadow on his face, but the gleam of a tooth hinted towards his smile, the smile whose origins were to be revealed.
    "Well, if you're too tired, I suppose you won't wanna come with me then, hm?'


    The dark wolf hummed, sitting down and looking expectantly at his packmate, a small measure of mischief in his gaze.