Error 404: Hat not Found {Open; Joining}

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If you'd like some free FeralFront memorabilia to look back on fondly, see this thread from Dynamo (if this message is still here, we still have memorabilia): https://feralfront.com/thread/2669184-free-feralfront-memorabilia/.

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    [size=7pt]Former Housecat |:| No Powers |:| Easy |:| No Kill |:| Hover for Mitzu[/size]

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    [fancypost bgcolor=#333300; bordercolor= transparent; borderwidth= 0px; overflow: auto; width: 350px; height: 200px; opacity: 0.8;][font=trebuchet ms]~Don't worry dolly, I'll make it open after your post.




    Mud mud mud mud mud, watch the log, don't step on the froggy, mud mud mud yucky mud, is she gaining? Should I look? ...No, I don't wanna know. Gotta keep running...




    Hat tripped for the third time, effectively planting his lovely fave in the swampy mud that pretty much coated this place, much to the tuxedo tom's disdain. But there was no time to mourn over his ruined looks right now; Hat was much to busy running from the walking incarnation of a heat-seeking missile. Was she even following? Hat looked at the surrounding wall of foreboding trees, trying to pick out at least on flicker of movement. It's not like he'd hear her coming if she was coming after him. Hat quickly scraped the mud off his face and took of toward what he hoped was the edge of the territory. A small buzz by his ear let him know that Mitzu, his kinda-faithful hummingbird companion, was right by him while he fled for his... eh, not his life... his looks. Yeah. That's pretty much what was going on here. There was no way on starclan or earth he would ever join a place filled with this much mud. When she first proposed that he come here and do his usual Hat things, the tux tom thought she was joking. When she slung him over her back and drug him here, he quickly found out that she was dead seri-




    Hat tripped again, interrupting Wendigo's attempts at establishing a backstory to this thread. "Dang flabbit!" Hat yelled, though his sorta-curse was muffled by the mud around his face. The tux tom sat up and spat out a wad of swamp peat. Forget Jiyu, Shadowclan's territory would get him first! Hat grumbled to himself, which is something he didn't do quite often, and took off again. This place was teeming with hidden natural booby traps, and the fact that Hat ran like a drunken ballerina didn't help in the least bit. But what could you expect from the former kittypet?




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    and here I am.
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    She had trained for week's sensing the coming of Shadow Clan entering another Bloody Era, now that her son sat as Deputy, she sat Head General, and malice was quickly taking over the high power. However, the female had also sensed trouble coming with this, an issue she didn't want to deal with, the only way she knew to deal it was screaming! Staying up late one night, she'd discovered she did have one other way to teach her Clan the lesson they so desperately needed to learn, it was black and white, it had a bird, it wore green, it had cow licks and bug eyes, it liked to play dress up with a mass murderess.


    The name of Jiyu's secret weapon against the coming unfriendliness towards the more friendly she could see potentially coming? JHatsheput Simul Stamus. A Pacifist Vegan did not survive being related for her without his own set of skills besides her being possessive, she could be possessive over his corpse, she'd kept WhiteMoon's first one, she had the bones! "Are you really running from me hatsheput?"


    Her tri colored paw came back in front of him, the ebony one landing beside it, ears tipping back, tail lashing. She had cut him off, he wasn't too bright to her way, he should have kept his eye on her. "I'll steal some sock's for you if that's what you want, just take a walk around during the day and talk to my clan-mates, you'll see why I stole you away and took you here." she was his knight in shining armor okay? She was giving him something extra fun to do!


    "C'mon please, your the only one who can do this Hat, we're going bloody again and they need to be taught savages and cats like you can live together in relative peace without insulting each other all the time!" she looked right at him with her cold expression and took a few steps forward towards her brother. She wouldn't be caught saying that out load, or anywhere mentally where anyone could hear. hat would be the only one to know! The bug eye was staying, and making Shadow Clan a bloody united force!

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    [size=7pt]Former Housecat |:| No Powers |:| Easy |:| No Kill |:| Hover for Mitzu[/size]

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    [fancypost bgcolor=#333300; bordercolor= transparent; borderwidth= 0px; overflow: auto; width: 350px; height: 200px; opacity: 0.8;][font=trebuchet ms]Hat put a forepaw on his pristine white chin and stroked it methodically. "Hm, hm, yes, I see your point. I do need some socks. Especially ones made by designer Pierre Du'frenchiare III." His methodical chin strokes grew more exaggerated, his forepaw now brushing against the edge of his scarf. "Green edition with woven yellow patterns. But you're forgetting one thing." Hat suddenly reached inside his scarf and whipped out a half empty package of triple pepper pizza topping dust. It's blistering contents literally exploded over the two cats, invading nasal passages, mouths, and eyes. Luckily Hat had held his breath and aimed most of it at Jiyu, so he wouldn't get the worst of it. Hat wheezed and shook his head in an effort to clear his burning nose and watering eyes as he spun around on his heels and blindly took off again. "I'd never stay in a place that had this much mu-" Hat was interrupted as he ran smack into a tree. Thankfully he hadn't picked up much speed, so there wasn't much damage unless you count his dignity. He simply fell over on his back and laid there for a few moments, stunned. However, he quickly regained his senses and flipped himself over to return to his running, now covered in more mud than he'd like. Ugh. He was going to have to dry clean his eyeballs after this.
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    Trackilacking




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    The tree went and did her job for her, that was always nice, the environment over reaching itself for her well being. "Please Hat, I Need You Right Now." not like she'd let him leave if she didn't want him to, she had a cage with a key on it if she needed it for him. Hatsheput was her brother, her's. However, she did need him right now, especially with Red being dead.


    "Come on we're going home." she mewed, as she tossed his dazzed form onto her back and headed right on toward's her cabin again. She'd pull him around on a sleigh if she had to.

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    [size=7pt]Former Housecat |:| No Powers |:| Easy |:| No Kill |:| Hover for Mitzu[/size]

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    [fancypost bgcolor=#333300; bordercolor= transparent; borderwidth= 0px; overflow: auto; width: 350px; height: 200px; opacity: 0.8;][font=trebuchet ms]Hat squirmed in Jiyu's grip for a little while as she drug him "home", but eventually gave up. Curse his noodle arms. Hat heaved a heavy sigh and went limp on Jiyu's back. "Okay, how about this," the tom said while picking a few flakes of mud off his pristine white paws. "I'll stay on three conditions. One: you find me a bath tub. And I don't mean dig a hole in the ground and fill it with water, I mean an actual tub. I've never had to lick my fur before, and I'm not about to start." Hat shuddered at the thought of tasting everywhere his fur had been. "Two: we room together or near each other. I am not staying in a dark smelly cave alone. And finally..." Hat adjusted his position on Jiyu's back so he could look at her face. "You'll show up to the parties I throw. And I get to dress you." Finally, for the first time in this thread, a goofy yet slightly mischievous grin stretched across the tux tom's face. "No complaining. No whining. Only partying." Oh yes. Jiyu was going to get social even if it killed her.




    "Other than that, I think this'll be fun. I haven't been in a group in a while, and I heard Shadowclan is a proclan and I've never been in one of those. It sounds nice. Doesn't smell nice, but definitely sounds nice. Hey, do they have Parcheesi? Twister? Jenga? Not scrabble though. Seriously, scrabble stinks. You have to be all smart and stuff." Hat stopped talking for a second as Mitzu landed on his head. "Oh, now you show up. You could've helped me escape here, but noooo, you said you had to go search for flowers for when Jiyu 'konked me on the head' and made us stay here. Real nice," the tux tom said. He blew a raspberry at the bird and then proceeded to do the most hattish thing he could do; sing a song.




    "In the merry month of June, from my home I started. Left the girls of Tuam, nearly broken hearted. Saluted me father dear, kissed me darling mother, drank a pint of beer, my grief and tears to smother. Then off to reap the corn and leave where I was born, cut a stout blackthorn, to banish ghost and goblin, in a brand new pair of brogues, go rattling o'er the bogs, frightening all the dogs,




    "On the rocky road to Dublin, one two three four five!"
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    "Um, hey Jiyu, watcha doin'?" Quad asked as she padded up, staring at the kid on her back.




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    [size=7pt]Former Housecat |:| No Powers |:| Easy |:| No Kill |:| Hover for Mitzu[/size]

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    [fancypost bgcolor=#333300; bordercolor= transparent; borderwidth= 0px; overflow: auto; width: 350px; height: 200px; opacity: 0.8;][font=trebuchet ms]Hat stopped his singing and looked over at Quad. "Ello love! She's just helping me avoid all of this mud." The tom then glanced accusingly at the ground as if it had just spat on a kit. His smile soon returned as he looked back up at the she-cat and continued his conversation as if he wasn't slung across another cat's back. "So I was just in the neighborhood, nice little place, could do with some febreze though, and I happened to notice that this place lacks..." Hat bit his lower lip as he searched for the right word. "Sunshine, light, or anything that brings joy in the hearts of friend and feline. You wouldn't happen to have a tanning booth here, would you? A solar lamp? A heat lamp? How about a flashlight? 'Cause honey, my complexion will not make it out here. I mean, just look at yours! Well, I mean, it looks good on you... Hey, do you moisturize? What kind of body lotion do you use? It can't be the mud that helps your skin, it smells like frog poop."




    Mitzu, the little blue hummingbird on Hat's head, gave Quad a glare so harsh no one would be surprised if the she-cat dropped dead right then and there, yet said nothing. Mitzu never talked much, as she preferred to glare at everything and everyone and count off all the things she hated about them. Lovely little bird, no?
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    Bistre had also perked up at the commotion, eyes widening as he saw the muddy figure on the sturdy shoulders of his Aunt...


    "...Hat?" Could that be him? Really? He hadn't seen his Father since his wedding day...ears twitched back untrustfully.

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    [font=georgia][size=6pt][color=white](c)[color=black]la bokeh

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    [size=7pt]Former Housecat |:| No Powers |:| Easy |:| No Kill |:| Hover for Mitzu[/size]

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    [fancypost bgcolor=#333300; bordercolor= transparent; borderwidth= 0px; overflow: auto; width: 350px; height: 200px; opacity: 0.8;][font=trebuchet ms]Hat's ear perked up at the sound of Bistre's voice. "...Grim?" The tux tom craned his neck as he searched for the source of the voice. While he would have loved for that voice to have belonged to his brother, his heart still lept with joy when he saw his son. This was even better. But Hat wasn't usually one to mistake voices; Bistre had always sounded kind of like his uncle, but now the similarity lay in tone rather than sound. Not many cats would notice a tone as subtle as this, but not many cats were Hat. Voices, tones, emotions, and movement meant everything to the tom. Bistre had a leader's tone. Just like Grim did. Just like Arosa did. But, to Hat's knowledge, Bistre wasn't ever a leader. Weird.




    Anywho, while Wendigo was busy typing about nothing, Hat had all but flown off of Jiyu's back and skirted across the swampy ground at a speed that would leave other cats dumbfounded. You could practically see the rainbow blowing out of his butt as he zoomed towards Bistre, squealing with glee. Hat wasn't even ballerina-stepping like before when he was running for his life; if Hat liked you more than he hated mud, then you darn well better prepare for one big-




    A muddy, tired, and completely frazzled Hat smashed into Bistre, totally interrupting Wendigo's muse ramblings. This was no cute kitty-rubs-against-you hug; this was a full on arms-around-your-neck cheek-to-cheek no-personal-space awkward-for-the-son tackle hug.
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    The smoke hadn't really had time to react before his back hit the mud, thick fur soon splattered and matted with muck from both sides as he was shoved into the mud by his over zealous Father.


    Anxiety and creeps of OCD prickled his pelt as dirty and grime intermixed with his pelt, and it was his imediate reaction to try and shove the tuxedo male off of him - except Hat seemed to be infused with the same super-human strength he had when Bistre was a kit, iron arms locking him down and holding him so tight that he nearly forgot how to breathe.


    However, there was a feeling of elation in him as the scent of his Father washed over his senses, paired with the hug that he realized was real. This wasn't some sort of sick dream or graphic nightmare, this was his Father seemingly back from the dead alive and well right before him. There wasn't an inch of Bistre that hadn't missed his parent's, his former life, his kithood. Even as he stood here in Shadowclan camp his mind would still wander off to the castle and the small stuffed animal filled booth that he and all of his siblings were born in. Before Hawkclan. Before the rise and fall of his reign. Before his temptations with the dark forest. Before Harrier and the kits that now filled and consumed every bit of his life.


    He was practically a kit again in his Father's arms, a tightness in his chest nearly threatening to prickle his eyes with tears of joy. Hatsheput was alive.


    It took a moment thanks to his pride, but paws eventually wrapped around the older male, his head pressing into blotches of white and black fur as his brow furrowed with emotion. His Father was alive.


    How much had happened since then? He and Harrier had tried to have kits, but she had miscarried due to a rogue attack. Harrier became a leader, and then so had he. They had a litter, seven little black and brown colored kittens...and Bistre had killed a man trying to bring his mate back from the demons that took her away from him...


    All that pain felt so new, though the sight, scent, and feel of his Father next to him was like a breath of fresh air. Maybe Hat would want to stay this time...Jiyu was here, Antonio was here - his kittens were here! Great goodness, they would be apprentices soon and they hadn't even met their grandfather yet...Bistre hadn't been so happy in such a long time.
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    [font=georgia][size=6pt][color=white](c)[color=black]la bokeh

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    [size=7pt]Former Housecat |:| No Powers |:| Easy |:| No Kill |:| Hover for Mitzu[/size]

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    [fancypost bgcolor=#333300; bordercolor= transparent; borderwidth= 0px; overflow: auto; width: 350px; height: 200px; opacity: 0.8;][font=trebuchet ms]Hat finally released his son once he was sure that this Bistre was the real deal, not some hallucination caused by eating the wrong mushroom. Again. The tom squeezed the smoke once more just to be sure. Yep. It's a Bistre. Hat took half a step back so he could give Bistre his practically tademarked goofy grin. A mere second later that grin morphed into a slightly perplexed frown. Wordlessly, Hat began to mess with Bistre's headfur. Daemons, did he usually keep it this way? It made him look all grown up. How about a classic axe spiked look? ...No, that looked stupid. The tux tom molded the hair into a formal and sleek look, then gently tousled it to make it look slightly untamed. There. Now he looked like a classy young whippersnapper. The grin returned in full force as Hat helped Bistre up and used the end of his scarf to start wiping the mud off of his son's cheeks like all good helicopter daddies should. "Jeeze Biz, did you get in a fight with a dumpster?"
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    "No, just a father." his tail would flick and twitch with agitation, paw almost immediately moving to rub his hair tuft back in place. The soft growl was natural as ears pinned back and his head dropped a little, the younger a little unsettled by being babies by his Father. "Where have you been all these seasons Hat? I thought you got drunk and wandered off during the wedding reception."

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    [font=georgia][size=6pt][color=white](c)[color=black]la bokeh

    [align=center][color=lightgreen]"Correction; I got drunk during the reception, wandered off, then got kidnapped by a trucker who thought I was adorable in my little tuxedo." Hat frowned slightly. "Twenty internet videos later, I bid him adieu and went off on my own to search for... for..." The tuxedo tom inhaled sharply in an effort to compose himself so he wouldn't spoil the moment. For your sisters. Instead of finishing his sentence, Hat coughed and quickly said "I'm an internet meme now, so there's that."


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    He wasn't a tom who knew of internet memes and the such, he assumed it was something as magical and mysterious as his Father now, which reminded him... "...well I'm a Father now." he mewed. "-litter of seven, ring any bells with that one?" His genes had been as avid as his own Dads, what an odd coincidence.

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    [font=georgia][size=6pt][color=white](c)[color=black]la bokeh

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    [size=7pt]Former Kittypet |:| Vegetarian/Pacifist |:| Easy |:| No Kill
    Hover for Mitu    [/size]

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    Hat froze.




    He stared at Bistre. Slowly, a wide open-mouthed grin spread across his face and a little 'squee' began to rise from his still form. Well, not so still anymore. He was practically vibrating, as if he was about to turn into a rainbow-fueled bottle rocket. Oh wait, he was.




    "More little Bistres?! What the crap are we doing here?!" Hat grabbed his son and sped off towards the Shadowclan camp. "Catcha later, Jiyu!"
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