₴кιη & ฿σηєѕ {Private}

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[tt]|| Andy Lites||

"I can't explain why I starve myself, why I hurt myself in every way. But I can tell you part of the reason. I do it, because I hurt myself so you don't have to. I've been cutting for 3 year, but recently they're getting deeper and deeper. I've been malnourished for 8 months, I was put in the hospital and stayed there for 15 days to gain weight... 8 months ago I weighed 118 pounds, A pretty healthy weight.. 2 months later I had lost 10 pounds, dropping fast. 2 months ago I weighed 97 pounds... now I way 74 pounds, a deathly weight. I can see my bones.. well they can.. all I see when I look in the mirror is fat. I'm slowly killing myself."

I looked at my image in the blurry, mirror of my high school bathroom. My face no longer had color, my cheek bones more than noticeable. My lips were now as pale as my face, making them look thin and Dark circles shadowed my grey eyes. It wasn't a different person in the mirror, but I realized how different I had looked just months ago. My bones, day by day, became more pungent, and there was no hiding it. I wore blue jeans and a dark sweatshirt, both way too big on me. I use to wear a pant size of 6, but Now I was around a one or 0. I couldn't buy clothes that would fit though, I didn't have the money.
The only skin visible on my body was my scrawny face and bony hands, that I couldn't hide. I sighed, feeling guilty that I had just eaten a nasty school lunch and had emptied it in the toilet just moments ago. I mean.. it was nothing new, I did it every day, more than twice. I bent over the sink, rinsing my mouth out, in hopes to mask the smell of my breath. My dark hair use to be so thick and pretty, now it was mangled and thin.
I exited the bathroom, walking back into the lunch room. The aroma of food made my guilt twice as bad as my stomach growled. Just like everyday I'd have at least 45 minutes left of lunch to sit alone and wait.
I crawled onto the hard bench of an empty lunch table, hiding my face within my straggly hair. Fumbling with the cuff on my sleeve, I bit my lower lip, letting the suicidal thoughts slip into mind.

NOTICE:

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[color=white][tt]|| Andy Lites||

[color=white]I was lost deep within my mind when a girl spoke. Was she talking to me? I flinched at her simple words, even though they weren't loud. I slowly brought myself to look at her. Wow, she was so pretty.. and that's why you're doing this to yourself.. to look 'pretty'.. I thought. I quickly looked away staring at my pale hands. I bit my lip harder, she was expecting an answer.

I let my hair fall into my eyes before answering, "If this is another joke I will hurt you.." I muttered, not even close to sounding threatening. It was over exaggerated.. Actually I would never hurt anyone even if I had to. My stomach became nauseous as I waited for her answer to my poorly toned threat.

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[color=white][tt]|| Andy Lites||

[color=white]I listened to her laugh, it was light and happy. I watched her take a seat across from me, not liking that she had given me a compliment. I never knew how to respond to such nice words. I never heard them so why would I have an experience. I bit my lip, thinking of a reply. "I'm Andy." I whispered, hoping she would hear. I never liked talking loud. Even when people raised their voice it made me cringe, thinking they'd hurt me even though they wouldn't.

I sighed, pulling my hands into the sleeves of my sweater. I refused to make eye contact or even look at her. Looking at pretty people made me utterly depressed

Bump!

Hello? I made this just for you and you haven't replied.

--Insanity