Trust-Shattering Secrets {P, Hokum}

When I pry my eyes open, their lids still heavy from exhaustion, I must force myself to stand up. I blink, the rays of the morning sun coming too quickly for my adjusting pupils. I press the heels of my hand into my eyes, hoping to rub away the violet bags I know surround them. With a careful hand, I straighten the kinks and wrinkles on my night gown heaving a deep sigh and setting my hands on my hips.
There is little to see in this place I call home. It's just your standard wooden cabin, sturdy but in no way attractive. I have a mattress, if you'd like to call it that, but it is dirty and worn out. I have become accustomed to resting on a neat pile of animal. skins. I also have a small dresser with a mirror that sits above it, swirled designs carefully carved into the mahogany wood. It is my most treasured possession, my father being the one who crafted it.
I stretch my arms, releasing a loud and unlady like yawn, but there is nobody around to scold me. I am the only one, as I always have been since the age of seven, when my parents were murdered. I had to learn quite quickly how to care for and feed myself in order to prevent being taken into an orphanage. But its was easier for me than it would be for a normal child, as I have always had the ability to shift into a five foot tall wolf at will, with jaws strong enough crush the skull of a cow.
I make my way towards the dresser, giving my reflection a quick study. I'll give myself one thing; I'm gorgeous. I don't mean to sound so boastful, but its true. It's not something I wave in peoples faces, but I won't deny it, either. My eyes are a bright, piercing green, almost hypnotizing if you watch them for too long. My hair is long and blonde, thick too, with curls in just the right places. My complexion is like that of a doll, flawless and smooth. Well, nearly flawless. Just as I had though, my eyes are encircled with the purple rings that prove my lack of sleep.
Last night was the full moon, a perfect time for shifting. I was never sure why, it just always felt right. I'm doing it again, drifting off into my thoughts. School will be starting soon, I must hurry. With quick, nimble movements, I pull my stockings, gown,and cap from the drawer. I slip out of my night clothes, pulling my day outfit over my head. I adjust it quickly, sliding on my stockings and tying my cap. The fabric is warm and familiar against my flesh, and I cant stop a smile from curling over my lips. I jog out the doorway, nearly forgetting my shoes.
The route to school is dull and familiar, the grass dead from were I have walked the path so many times. In a matter of minutes I spy the wooden structure of the schoolhouse, and I pick up the pace. When I enter the building, I take my normal seat, wiping a few beads of sweat from above my lip. I am uncomfortable, as usual, with so many human beings surrounding me, but have to resist the urge to get up and leave. People typically never bother me, so when an unfamili boy sits next to me, I shift uncomfortably, moving my hand back to rub my thigh uncomfortably. But on It's way there, my.fingers accidentally brush against his arm. I draw back, blushing.
"Sorry," I murmur, looking away.

I can feel a blush rising beneath my skin, which will be obvious to anyone who has me in their sights, as I am so pale. When I lift my gaze to meet the boys, feeling his stare beating down onto me, and see him quickly withdraw his eyes. Typically, such a reaction from a male would anger me quite a bit. Through the years, every man I've encountered has wanted to be involved with me sexually. The boys that knew me well, or as well as I would allow, were aware of the fact that I didn't put up with it. I treasure my body, its not something Ill hand over on a whim. When that time does come, it will be with someone I know and love.
If I could ever trust anyone enough to fall in love with them.
But this stare didn't seem to be sexual, more admiring than anything. That was a change. A good one in my opinion. My eyes blink rapidly as my cheeks grow pinker by the second. A boy actually looking at me in a nice, appropriate way. It was so... Im not sure what it is, but its a nice feeling.
Not only this, but with gaze holding him, I feel a tingling, a sense of something. I've never felt it before, and it doesnt remind of any particular emotion I've experienced before. It's nothing related to the embarrassment I'm currently undergoing, and I just can't place a finger on it.
Without even thinking I whisper, "Seventeen.", My eyes, still locked on his face.

I can feel the corners of my mouth turning up in the beginning of a smile as the boy answers, clearly embarrassed. I'm still trying to determine what the feeling is, but drop the inappropriate fixation on his face. He's handsome... Wait, what in the hell am I doing? I don't think that way! I'm Elizabeth Helms, daughter of the wolves. I don't fall for troublesome school boys! Especially not ones that seem older than I am. Although, I am petite, so nearly everyone I encounter seems older than I. A sixteen year old should be at least a foot taller than I currently am.
Throughout the rest of the class, I pay only partial attention, stealing glances at the boy every few moments, blushing each time he catches me. When we ate dismissed, I can't get to my feet fast enough. I just want to get back to being alone in my cabin, and forget this dreadful experience.
My shoes click against the wooden floorboards as I try to get out first, but end up in the back of the horde. I wait impatiently for the others to get out the door, pushing forward as much as I can. When my turn finally arrives, I attempt to take a long step out, but I feel a l arge hand wrap around my forearm, pulling me back in. I can tell by the stench of mule sweat who it is.
Tucker.
I feel my throat clench as the older boy drags me back into the building, shoving me against a wall. I feel the firmness against my back and concentrate on that in order to keep myself from shifting out of anger. This happens often, and I've learned to just let him have his fun and be done with it.
Tucker is a bulky man, a few years older than I am. He has an unkempt beard that grows unruly across his face and neck. I close my eyes, gagging at the scent of his breath.
I feel him place a hand on my thigh, the other holding me in place. "Hey, sugar cube, where ya headed in such a hurry?" I hear his group of friends chuckle behind him.
He presses his face against my neck, his lips trailing along my skin. I want to puke. Just before he reaches my chest I duck away, and he doesn't like that.
He grabs my face, shoving me roughly back where I was originally. "Hey, hey, hey," He speaks as if calming an overexcited child. The force of his hand pushing me back forces a slight whimper from my throat. I fins myself praying for the teacher to stop them, but she leaves before any of the students do.
I am alone.

I feel hot tears forming behind my eyess as the boy approaches, and shockingly, I'm still blushing. I can feel Tucker's grip tighten, his hand now on the more sensitive part of my neck. His hands are rough and callused, scratchy against my skin. I don't want the boy dragged into this. Tucker and his gang were her problem to deal with, not his. Besides, they'd never gone any farther than touching her, and if they even tried anything else she wouldnt hesitate to shift into her wolf form and personally decapitate them.
I keep my eyes shut tight, not wanting to see him while he's this close. At least this way I can pretend its somebody tolerable. Like the boy...
I feel Tucker's weight shift as he swings around to look at the boy. "Listen here, boy. Just turn around and mind y own business." He strokes my cheek with a dirty finger. "Me and Elizabeth are just having some fun now, ain't we Liz?"
I shift from one foot to another, ashamed that the boy is whitnessing this. A tear spills over the lid, and I quickly blink it away.
"It's alright." I say, my voice cracking.
No, its no alright. But I don't want him dragged into this.
"Please, just go." I whisper.

I feel a certain warmth flood over me as the boy stays, telling then to let me go, but also a sinking feeling of dread. Tucker doesn't take kindly to resistence, I learned that the hard way. The first time I tried running he gave me a black eye. Something I won't soon forget. Tucker chuckles, pulling me over so that I stand infront of the boy.
"Look, kid. I know you're too young to understand this," He starts in a raspy voice, "but I'm doin her a great favor. Ya see."
He grabs my chin, tilting my head up. "I give her a purpose. Girls like her are only good for one thing."
I'm glad my eyes are closed so that I don't see whatever sick motion he makes. But I can't stand it, I need to see him.
With some force, I pry open my eyes, face to face with the boy. Well, nearly, considering how much taller he is. I stare deep into his eyes, and I can feel it again. What is that? Why can't I figure this out?
Unexpectedly, I feel Tucker's grip slacken, and I don't hesitate. I pull away from him, coming to an awkward stop against the boy, as he was so close to me.
"What the Hell?" Tucker roars. "Get em'!"
As I said, he doesn't take kindly to resistence.
My former embarrassment forgotten, I lean harder against the boy as large men start towards me. This is getting out of hand. All I have to do is shift and I could kill them all. But that would mean revealing my secret, and that would mean death.

I feel adrenalin pulse through my body bringing every nerve and sense to life. I relish the feeling of my feet pounding against the ground, the boys tight grasp on my wrist, the shouting of Tucker's gang as they approached. Without hesitation, I joined the boy behind the rocks, trying my best to quiet my breathing.
My eyes are wild with the excitement of the dash, and blonde strands fall from my neat bun, lingering around my face like a picture frame. It is cramped, and we are pressed close, but I don't mind. In fact, it actually feels... Nice. I've never touched a male, or been touched by one, that I don't despise. And I hate to say it, but for the first time in my life, I think horomones will be my enemy. Why? What am I thinking? You don't know him, you can't trust him, he'll betray you in the end.
Keeping this in mind, I lift myself slightly away from him, but we are still closer than we should be. I hold my breath as the deep, scratchy voices make their way past our hiding spot, and I can't help it. I guess It's this overwhelming swirl of emotions, but I burst into laughter.
I laugh so hard that I clench my stomach because it begins to ache, and I know I must look insane, because I'm crying at the same time. I try my best to contain it, but giggles still leak out, and I blush for what feels like the thousandth time.

I am embarrassed about laughing, but not as embarssed as when he puts his hand over my mouth. His skin feels strong, but not scratchy like Tucker's. I didn't know it was even possible, but his hand feels... Kind. The sensation of his skin against my lips is actually rather soothing.
I lean back against the rocks, my giggling spurts now muffled by the hand. His hand. On my mouth. I listen to the fading sounds of the voices, waiting a moment after they had completely disappeared. I lifted a hand, delicate fingers trailing over the farm boy's hand. I give him a nod telling him he take it away now.
For a moment, I almost wish that the men would come back that we could stay a little while longer, but I know that is rediculous. However, I can repay him. The men are still out there, they could attack him. I could invite him to my cabin.
But then he might ask questions... It didn't matter, she didn't want him to het hurt.
She patiently waited for the pressure to move away from her mouth.

I look back at the boy, my eyes borning into his. I furrow my brow in concentration, leaning in so that we're close enough to share breaths. "Uh huh." I say, absorbing every inch of his face. I smile at him. "Thanks for saving me." I trace a finger along his jaw, which is probably inappropriate, but I'm too distracted to notice or care.
Something about his face seems so familiar, so right.
Surely it couldn't be be... No, it would have been more obvious, wouldn't it? I could have told beforehand, right?
I knew how awkward this was going to be, but I had to know for sure.
"Listen I need to kiss you," I say, hearing how stupid I sounded, "Just trust me."
Every werewolf has the ability to sense their solemate, the one they're destined to be with. I've never felt anything close tohi it until now, so I need to know.
Without waiting for a response, I lean in, pressing my lips to his. It's so nice, I almost don't notice the vision flashing through my mind.
It is me and the boy, in multiple time eras. I can see us growing older every time the vision changes, and its also very obvious we're in love. Yes, yes, yes, I have found him! How could it have been like this though? In this situation?
I don't care, I'm just so happy to have the one I was destined to be with. If what I've heard is true, he saw the vision too.
I grab his face, pushing our lips together, not ready to let go yet. I feel a quite giggle rise in my throat, and I laugh a muffled laugh as we kiss.

I feel a fluttering in my stomach as each vision flips past, burned into my mind. They're so beautiful, so right. I don't want to stop, not at all, but when the rather gorey image enters my mind I pull away. I suck in deep breaths, as I hadn't breathed at all through the experience. I look him over, as I have done multiple times now, and take in every ounce of it. Of him. He is mine, and always was. It's strange, really. Just this morning I didn't even know him, and now we are bound by a force more powerful than anything. Fate.
The I realize, I still don't even know his name. Suddenly, the terrible vision I just whitnessed doesn't matter.
I have found the one person, the only person, in the world that I can truly trust. The men, Tucker, my parents, all of my life has been headed towards this moment; meeting my soulmate.
I feel a little hurt as he breaks away, panicky. He obviously doesn't have the same thoughts. I don't care. I lean in, pulling the boy into a large embrace, and for the first time in a long time, I break.
I cry, tears flowing uncontrollably. I don't have to be alone anymore.
He is mine.
He is mine.
He is mine.
Despite what it may look like, I an overwhelmed with joy.
"So," I whisper, "What's your name?" I laugh a little, hoping they men are far gone so that they don't can't hear me. Even if they could, though, I'm not sure I would care.

I look into his eyes again, my heart rate stedily climbing, becoming so loud im sure he can hear it. I when he tells me his name, Timothy, I smile, keeping him held tight within my arms. I must seem crazy to any other person, but surely he knows what the visions meant. Surely? "Yes," I say, grasping his hand with my own,"I'm Elizabeth." I just try wishing away everything, away the world, so that I can just sit and talk to him.
This should be a happy experience, not a terrifying one. I push the thought of us being attacked aside, sure its just something I've misunderstood. Something I'm looking at the wrong way. Suddenly, I remember my cabin. It wouldn't take long to get there. Just a quick sprint through the trees and we would be safe.
And alone.
It was strange to be attracted to someone I barely knew, but at the same time we had known each other our whole lives, we just needed some time to meet in the flesh. I grab his arm, dragging him into the open and making a mad dash in the direction of my home. As I had expected, we arrived in moments, and I stood panting infront of the wooden structure.
"This is my home," I gasped between breaths, looking over to Timothy.