Never be forgotten. Comments wanted please! First draft

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  • I've never finished a fan fic before so wish me luck.
    Never be forgotten
    Goldenpaw sat in the medicine den organizing herbs. She wasn't the best medicine cat, she wasn't even decent. All she could do was intercept visions, signs, and understand things. She just set her heart on it. She thought back to 3 sunrises ago, when Shadowclan had invaded Thunderclan. She had fought one of the newest warriors, Lightfur. She fought well, too well.
    Through Tiger's eyes darkness will rise again,through a heart of gold the past is to never be forgotten, but the final battle will end in the blazing river.
    It kept comming back to her. She just needed to know what it meant. "Were you thinking about it again?", Jayfeather asked out of nowhere. Goldenpaw wondered when he got there. "Well if the final battle ends in the blazing river shouldn't we find it before the rest of the prophecy?", she asked.
    "Prophecies are strange things. They don't always seem clear at first", Jayfeather replied.
    Then, Goldenpaw's latest vision came to her.
    "I' m sorry Goldenpaw, but I've never seen a Starclan warrior. They've never spoken to me. The past will never be forgotten, but I don't think there is a Starclan" Amberpaw's words stung greatly. As she left a shadow appeared looming over Goldenpaw. "The past will never be forgotten, huh? We'll see about that. Remember this when Starclan is on their paws begging for mercy.", Said a cold dark voice. Then everything went black and the world slipped away.


    Chapter 2
    Goldenpaw opened her eyes. she was back where she was, in the medicine den. She wondered about how Amberpaw didn't believe in Starclan and how many others would follow. The thing is, she knew a secrect. Cats were fading faster than ever and no new cats were comming in Starclan. Where they went? she had no idea. The last cat who made it to Starclan was Moonkit. Her sister. What does it mean? When your told things happen for a reason? Moonkit would never know what it was like to become a warrior, she wouldn't have a mate, kits,she never even got to open her eyes and see the world. Then the strangest thing happened. The newest member of Starclan had dissapeared suddenly. Goldenpaw didn't know why or how she just hoped she was ok. "Blazepaw! why are you soaking wet? get in here now!" Jayfeather's voice surprised Goldenpaw. Of course, Blazepaw.
    "I fell in the river", Blazepaw explained quickly.
    "Moused brained apprentices" Jayfeather muttered.
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    Blazepaw's Pov (Point of View)
    As he explained how he was all soaking wet Blazepaw felt guilty. But it all washed away. They'll never understand, so why make them?
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    Jayfeather's Pov
    "Darkness, could that mean the dark forest?" Goldenpaw asked.
    "It could mean anything".
    "You never really told me much about Tigerclaw",Goldenpaw said.
    "I didn't want to scare you", Jayfeather responded. Then he realizd. Something was off. "Why did you say Tigerclaw?" He asked.
    "Tigerclaw was never a true leader he doesn't deserve the star. Starclan must have been furious when they had to give him 9 lives, of course same with Brokentail" Goldenpaw said.
    Goldenpaw was an interesting young apprentice. She was wise for someone so young."So Blackstar would be Blackfoot? You know he was on Tigerstar's side when Tigerstar was alive."Jayfeather said.
    "So were many others. But they weren't all true evil",Goldenpaw replied.
    Pure evil, Jayfeather thought. If only she knew.


    Chapter 3
    Jayfeather walked up to Lionblaze, "We need to talk, in the uasl spot. Bring Dovewing i'll bring Goldenpaw".
    "What does Goldenpaw have to do with all this?" Lionblaze asked.
    "Trust me"
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    Goldenpaw followed Jayfeather. He had asked for her to come. "Well? What's this all about",She asked.
    Lionblaze turned to her,"Through Tiger's eyes. That is like what would happen in Tigerstar's world. A world of endless slaughter."
    "A heart of gold. I think that might involve you." Jayfeather said.
    "Me?" Goldenpaw asked.
    "The past should never be forgotten. You know Raggedstar fadded 2 sunrises ago?" Jayfeather asked.
    "Already?!?" Goldenpaw knew cats were fadding fast but, she didn't think that fast!
    Suddenly a scream appeared out of nowhere. "It came from Dovewing. Goldenpaw realized what was happening. Dovewing was having her kits.
    Goldenpaw ran as fast as she could to find a stick. She set it down next to Dovewing and ran back to get help. "Bumblestripe!" The warrior looked at her. "What?"
    "Dovewing is having your kits, right now!"
    Bumblestripe's eyes widdened. They ran back to Dovewing. There were already 3 healthy looking kits.
    Bumblestripe slicked a sliver tabby in the ear. "I like spottedkit for this one" Dovewing said motioning